How to confront/prove my boyfriend is stealing money from me?

For the last year every couple weeks I notice that $20-$50 goes missing from my wallet. Finances are tight for me right now so this is money that could go for transport, food, etc. I ask my boyfriend if he's borrowed it and he denies and asks if I miscounted or got it stolen. I have miscounted before so I always second guess myself even though I've been more careful lately to always know how much I have. I love my boyfriend and he does pay for some things in the relationship but I can't have an unapologetic thief. I don't want to confront him if it's not him but I'm to the point where I lie about how much I have and am considering hiding my money to try to save it. My boyfriend likes to spend the money he makes fast so him being short is not new. any advice?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Dump him even if he didn't steal because this:

    " My boyfriend likes to spend the money he makes fast so him being short is not new. "

    is all you need to know that, as long as you stay with him, you will have problems.

    Move on and find a fiscally responsible guy.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Girl ! Get out of that boys life ASAP! My hobby is studying body language. It can be very helpful in Time of need. but also I study speech and hidden messages. so basically. If you ask someone a question such as " are you stealing my money?" And they give you a straight answer, (yes or no, no words following) they are being truthful but if the conversation end up feeling tense after you ask the question and his face starts to move around a lot and he starts "turning things around" on you. then you are talking to a lair. For example like you said
    "Have you borrowed any money from me? "
    I assume his answer was like this,
    "No, why would you ask me that? Did you go to a party and put your bag down some where , did you spend money and just forget?"
    See this is what the lair is doing, for one , they are moving the spotlight to everyone but them , secondly they are acting as if they want to help you. (obviously they aren't if they are lying to you. But there's a rule to lie detecting. Know your subject well, because people all have habits a d ways of doing things and that can make reading body language and speech very difficult.

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What Guys Said 4

  • count how much money you have, secure it where you get to it and see what happens. Drug habit issues? Could it be you are blacking out? 20 to 50 goes fast.
    The other thing is to put it in a bank and use a credit card or debit card... keep watch on the transactions. I'm not a fan of debit cards but some people are.

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  • Put money in your purse, document what you have, and DON'T SPEND IT. See if some ends up going missing at some point.

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  • This is why guys shouldn't pay for any thing for a girl ^

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  • Set up a hidden camera.

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What Girls Said 7

  • I'd say with go with the plan of keeping small amounts in your purse, and hiding some etc. Miscounting happens but if it's weekly? He's just lying and using you and that's not fair.
    If you don't want to confront straight away, especially without evidence, I say go with what you said as mentioned. Or set up a camera for the night on your purse when you notice the money typically goes "missing/miscounted".

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  • Set up a camera to know for sure. Don't accuse him without proof cause he'll gaslight you and get smarter about getting away with it. try and catch him out and then kick his ass!

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  • I would say put money somewhere safe. Don't assume he is stealing it , for all you know he is not.

    My dad is someone who seems to always lose money every once in a while.

    Either he drops them on the street, or gives the wrong note/bill

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  • Set up a hidden camera, call the police and lock him up.

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  • You can get those pens where you write on money and it's invisible til you wanna see it.

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  • You 100% sure he's stealing?
    If you are why would you still be with him?
    He stealing your freaking money. What kind of moron does that to his gf?
    Drop him already he's so wrong.

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  • Kick the thieving fucker out.

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