That they wouldn't want to date that person?
Most Helpful Girl
I have anxiety, and I have fought hard to work with my issues. For me personally if someone has a condition severe enough that it'll hinder our relationship (because they have to rely on me too heavily for support, not just for support in general) then it can pose an issue.
I'm not totally against the concept unless this person is an extreme case, because I tend to be attracted to confidence and the way a man carries himself.5
Most Helpful Guy
I think it's because we have become a society that values such extreme extroversion that anything other than being a loud-mouth "life of the party" is considered "undesirable". Many socially anxious people I know are actually good honest people, with integrity, and humility. None of that is valued in today's society though. It's about how "outrageous" and "in your face" someone is. Just look at some of the comments here:
we "have something to hide" we "are anti-social" we "are boring" we "make them uncomfortable (by not socializing enough!)" we "aren't being ourselves" we "give off negative energy" we "don't WANT too (socialize)".
None of those ideas are usually even remotely true. I mean people stay with other people who cheat, who are violent with them, but socially anxious? OMG! There is something wrong with our culture when many people forgive cheating, lying, and even violence, but Social Anxiety is often viewed as a mortal sin.
"Quiet" by Susan Cain goes into some more detail about the extroverted-obsessed culture we now live in. It deals more with introversion, but I think Social Anxiety is closely tied in.2