Friendzoned by a girl who I've known for 4 years?

So, I've known this girl for 4 years, since I was 14. I'm 18 now and so is she. I see her about 4 times a year and she's a family friend. Our families and a few others all friends have went on vacation every year, for the past 3 years. I've had strong feelings for her, and I'm in love with her for those 4 years. I recently asked her out during our vacation to get coffee and hangout and she said yes. So I started texting her being it the first time I have besides telling her Happy Birthday (I'm shy) and we have some small talk, I kind of realize when I text her she seems a lot more "less social" meaning not opening up as much. In real life we would talk for 30 minutes straight on various topics, she is shy as well but talking and texting weren't the same. So I end up asking her in text, if she's free over the weekend and she doesn't reply. So 1 day later, I send her a text telling her that I wanna be straight up and that she's got me confused and to let me know. She replies 4 days later, saying she's sorry, and that she didn't know what to say and that she thinks of me as a family friend and that she hopes everything can stay cool between us and hopefully plan a kickback with everyone soon that was on vacation. I respond saying of course it can, and that I'd hate to make her feel uncomfortable and that I'm glad we can still be able to talk. She later responded saying she's glad too, and that we'll all kick it soon. My cousin who is a close friend of hers has told me she wasn't looking for a boyfriend at this time, but the thing is my intentions were to take it super slow and just go out as friends in the first place and then maybe later if anything took off we would go from there. I plan on getting her a gift for her birthday in 6 months and just maybe try again. What's funny is the parents really like me and her father even hinted at me to date her 2 years ago. I would've asked her out earlier, but I didn't have a car and I thought to wait and get more "mature".


What Girls Said 1

  • She is not interested in you and she only sees you as a friend. She was probably feeling uncomfortable meeting with you alone.


What Guys Said 1

  • 1. Forget about her. She is going to tell you about her relationships and the guys she fuks, while you are the spectator.

    Solution: Don't talk to her, and find sonething better to do.

    2. If she even considers you at this point, just think of the miles of dick that she rode, raw, and that would put it into perspective, because it's going to happen.

    Solution: Forget about her.

    3. The most likely point that she would give you any consideration, would be after she is knocked up, gained weight, and/or has so much mental baggage, that she realizes that you are a safer bet, than the ass-holes she dealt with, while rejecting you.

    Solution: Just live your life, and when she comes back into your life, begging you to be with her, or reminding you of how you supposedly felt about her (because, trust me, she knows how you feel about her), just have your shit in order, and tell her that you have better things going for you.

    Realisticslly, pining over this woman, isn't going to do you any favors. In fact, you are causing yourself, unnecessary damage, and unneeded heartache, over someone that is careless about the time, you supposedly had together, and give no fucks about your feelings, unless it benefitted her. Nevertheless, I'm telling you this for your own good.

    Forget about her, find something better to do with your time. Find a hobby. Lift some weights, she isn't the only woman, and she doesn't give a damn about your feelings. Care about your own feelings.

    • 1mo

      This is a reoccurring theme.

      I've been through it, and I am telling you, from my experience, as a 37 year old man. I've been through this, myself.

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    • 1mo

      Thanks for the response.

    • 1mo

      Okay? And?