Fake/Real Lesbians?

Have you guys ever known a girl who was "gay" when you met her but then a few months/years down the line she's dating a guy?

I've been noticing this a lot even with some of the must butch lesbians.

I guess the stereotype "she's gay until the right guy comes along" has some truth to it?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • One of my friends went through a "lesbian phase" where she thought she was lesbian. Think it was about a year and some change she thought she was straight up gay.

    Dated, slept with girls, told me about it and asked me for advice. All of it, just like a woman with guys. I knew she wasn't gay just because my gut said so. No actual proof or anything. lol

    She's bisexual but didn't figure that out until she had her time to experiment. Doesn't make anything awkward, in case you're wondering.

    Met her current boyfriend and he's AAAAMAZING!

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    • 3mo

      I think my experiences are more along the lines of this. Girl who maybe at the time were "sure" they were gay but learned later they weren't. Nothing wrong with that at all. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't crazy lol

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    • 3mo

      @kelliekelliekellie - This lasted like a year and some change for her. XD But, that's pretty much how it went!

      I just froze and was like "I'm happy for you". lmao. Didn't even ask what happened to her being fully gay.

    • 3mo

      Yeah, it's like all these girls that pretended to be gay for Ruby Rose and it didn't mean shit lol

Most Helpful Guy

  • Being gay is a fad these days, especially with the youth. They are constantly exposed to how 'okay' it is so they want to try it.
    As the wife would say, 'Do they like the dick in and around the mouth?' This explains a lot, for either gender. :)

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    • 3mo

      When I worked at adidas years ago there was literally one girl who admitted that she was gay because a guy had done her dirty but then decided it wasn't for her

What Girls Said 13

  • No. Those girls may have been bi and you've mistaken them for lesbians. It does happen but is very rare, not the way you are making it sound.

    And you're bullshitting about "even some of the most butch lesbians" You will not see gold star studs hooking up with guys. That just about never happens.

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    • 3mo

      But see this is why it's so confusing the girls weren't bi- this has been happening for the years that I've worked in retail. We meet a hot girl
      In the store who we find out is gay- says she's gay not bi and doesn't like men. but I've watched it happen over and over again where a few months/ years down the line they are with a guy. And the very reason I made this post is because a butch or AG lesbian I used to work with put up a picture of a her new boyfriend today which is why I asked the question. We used to go after girls together. It seems to
      Support the stereotype I hear all the time.

      And let's just say in every single case ever I've seen personally that these were just very very confused girls doesn't that hurt the actual lesbians out there? because they have to deal with the guys who won't believe they are actually lesbian?

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    • 3mo

      @Futuredk were you harassing her? Some girls lie about being gay if a guy keeps bothering her after she rejects him

    • 3mo

      Lmaoo no. It has been multiple girls and never a situation like that. Just coworkers or friends. Read the other answers I am not completely alone in this experience

  • Yes , I know tons of girls who have gone gay. But they where the biggest hoes youd ever meet. I know guys who where flamboyant gay men who referred to themselves in female nouns who now like girls and refer to themselves in male noun. AND they aren't buy either gay or straight

    I dont care what any of these females on this site say. They aren't being honest, I've seen some crazy shit in the lgbt community in my 26 years. One of the many reasons i kept my distance nothing they did made sense.

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  • Yep. Plenty of times.
    I think that has to do something with this whole "fluidity of sexuality" thing. However I think it's still kinda weird. I've always been convinced homosexuality was something you were born with, like pre-natal biological factors - which was scientifically established I think? - but you see so many things nowadays that it's still hard to believe.
    I have some "girl" friends dating guys and still telling me that the female body gets them aroused, and then no longer, and then back again but for a specific person, and then that's just because their boyfriend was "unsatisfying".
    It's all very confusing and frankly quite offensive for the LGBT community that now seems like a bunch of confused people
    So in my opinion, I believe there's a group of "real" homosexuals, that is to say people with biological pre-dispositions for homosexuality (for lesbians, tomboys, girls with masculine traits and brain - actually that can be shown by the length of the fingers), OR there is SAME-SEX attraction, which to me is completely different, and which I believe comes from a certain type of narcissism (i. e. Freud's Theory on Sexuality, although it's different for men and women). But this same-sex attraction can sometimes never be followed by a romantic relationship, it is reduced to the status of a mere fantasy if you may, coming from an underlying narcissistic desire to have a same-sex sexual encounter as a result of making love to oneself

    Phew. Sorry for writing so much. It's just my opinion (I hold a PhD in Psychology and Gender Studies), hope this helps you building an opinion of yours. X

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  • It depends. I know of super gay men who married women in order to feel normal and be able to father children. It doesn't make them not gay or hipocrits. The need to be accepted socially, and raise a family sometimes comes with huge sacrifices.

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  • Nope never before
    In fact I've never met a gay unless they didn't tell me they are

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  • No never heard that but a friends sister who's always had a boyfriend now suddenly has a girlfriend.

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  • Thats this wonderous thing called being bisexual. I can be with a girl and have preferences for girls at one point, but then date a guy at another.

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    • 3mo

      Lol your data ask needs work. What you are saying only makes sense if the girl makes no claim to any orientation. But if you swear up down and over the moon that your gay but the. Start dating me people are naturally going to be confused and ask questions.

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    • 3mo

      @randomhobo That's weird though, when you say "preference for girls" at one point do you mean like, sexually? Because usually that's something you cannot change.

    • 2mo

      @kelliekelliekellie Preference means which way leaning. Sexuality isn't binary. I fluctuate along the kinsey scale a little from time to time.

  • For women, I think sexuality is fluid. Girls can like men at one moment, and then can switch up. I have a freind who liked a guy/slept with him, but she identifies as a lesbian.

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  • I think you are referring to bi sexuals lol

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    • 3mo

      So if I meet a girl and she says she's gay I should assume she is actually bi sexual?

    • 3mo

      No but girls like sometimes. Or say it to not get hit on

    • 3mo

      I totally get that but I'm talking about girls who you would believe we're gay because they say they are and you watch them date women for months years but then all of a sudden are with a guy.

  • Maybe they're just bi and didn't want you to know.

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  • Yeah i sm that girl started my sexual life with girls was years before i had sex with a guy
    Now happily married to a great guy and started a family.
    Never thought myself lesbian always bi , even when i was strictly girls allowed

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  • These girls are bisexual, that's all.

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    • 3mo

      Bisexual people face more stigma than gays, even. Both exclusively straight and exclusively gay people say they're faking or confused or selfish. So you can see where people try to avoid admitting it, even to themselves.

  • Im straight but there are girls who are bisexual so you are speaking out of ignorance

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    • 3mo

      Lol did you read my question. I'm speaking from
      Personal experience and I wanted to know if I was alone in it. Check the other answers for yourself.

    • 3mo

      I read your question

    • 3mo

      So after reading it and all the other answers how Am
      I speaking out of ignorance if I am literally asking a question based on my personal
      Experiences? I'm not trying to be an asshole or a jerk

What Guys Said 9

  • Or they were just bi all along.

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  • Yea, more or less. Lesbians become dykes due to some 'terrible experience' they had with a man and they shut themselves down on guys. After a while though they open themselves back up. It's rare that lesbians stay lesbians for life.

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  • Yea I had a friend in uni who actually told me that she was a lesbian, but she only ever slept with other girls, and is now dating a dude lol

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  • tow girl firends of mine said to me they were lesbians. they werent. i started kissing one and then the other, had a threesome and basically showed them how they like the dick - fact is, both of them werent into licking their pussies but i helped them liking it

    dont care man, gotta bang em all!!

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    • 3mo

      on a serious way tho, faking being lesbian is a thing nowdays. shrug it until its gone, its fashion!

    • 3mo

      @Alex88F looool wtf! they obviously weren't real lesbians, I heard real ones were just literally disgusted by the d*, as a straight man would be to another man's.

    • 3mo

      @kelliekelliekellie lolol i know.
      yeah agree a real lesbian wouldn't think about a D either

  • There's a study saying women are able to choose orientation if they want, more than men can. However, some are straight up born gay.

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  • Maybe they were simply experimenting or trying things out

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    • 3mo

      No a girl like that will
      Typically just be "bi-curious" or won't even put a set definition on her sexuality. Of my my best friends is a bi sexual woman. A lot of these girls are women who were 100% into
      Girls - gay pride - dicks are disgusting types. But I've seen it happen over and over again where they just change teams. It's been said a woman's sexuality is much more mailable than a mans which is why I've never ever seen a case of a gay man becoming straight. It seems to push the stereotype I described above.

    • 3mo

      That's true, women's sexuality is totally fluid. It's been proven lots of times

  • Gay girl? Lmao, we call em' lesbians don't we?

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  • No. Never saw it.

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  • I knew at least two women in college theatre who went from dating a woman to dating a man. I guess they were bisexual.

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