Long distance relationship, i love him and was planning to spend the rest of our lives together, we talked about marriage and i was ready to move to his country, only that i wanted a commitment. he told me he was ready to propose and bought a ring which i never saw, its now 8 month nothing, if i move i lose my job and citizenship , Am moving to another continent and he is not even trying to commit, what should i do?
Most Helpful Guy
Talk to him about it.
I was in a long-distance situation, two years. She broke up with me over things she never alluded to, worries and perceived slights that she never spoke of until she had already decided to end things. Her willingness to assume the worst about me without even asking what was going on on my end took me by surprise.
We started as pen pals. I helped her get accepted for an internship in the US which would have been good for her career and given us a month to see each other, but they denied her a visa to come and complete it - must have assumed she was an asylum risk thanks to current events in her home country, even if she hasn't lived there for many years. I scrambled around like a madman for a while, first looking for any way to salvage the internship for her, and then looking for any way they'd let her into the country at all after graduation - the findings were not promising. It wasn't until two months later that she told me she felt abandoned by me during that time - I was so focused on the problem that I wasn't talking to her as much as I ought to have been. Felt to me like I couldn't talk to her unless I had some good news to share - I was talking to lawyers, charities, a company I thought might sponsor an H1B - I was finding no answers, and I was ashamed. She was already crushed by the rejection, felt then like I'd only make things worse, but I wish more than anything I could go back. There were some miscommunications at this time that would only be revealed to me months later.
Went over to see her and her family for two weeks, and it felt like we got along beautifully, though there were times when she was unusually quiet. I was trying to figure how we'd do repeat visits and a fiance visa by the end of it. It was only then that she finally told me these things which had built up in her mind, going from "I love you" to not even wanting to be friends in less than two weeks after I got back.
My head is still spinning. I still feel that I love her, miss the future I thought we'd have together. I'd give anything to go back.
So yes... long story short, if you have concerns, tell him - don't wait until they become dealbreakers and then drop it on him like a load of bricks once it's too late to discuss it with no indication beforehand that anything was wrong. Communication is vital to any relationship, doubly so for long-distance ones, because if you don't talk about what's going on, your partner has little other way of finding out.1
Most Helpful Girl
Stay Put here, Dear... Something could Badly Backfire on the other side of the World.
Back in 2011, a Man from Egypt had Found me on Facebook and we Had started a Wild Whirl Wind Roamce by Chance. After gettingto know him and hi sfamily better on Skype, I then hopped A Board and went Abroad and spent 30 days with them in their Big family house. Things went so well that after returning ho, me, I climbed back on, going over again, where we Then.. tie dthe knot. I ended up residding there awhile, learning how to be amzuslim's wife.
I am Back now in the States, and with much Toil and Turmoil in our LDR, our Marriage was Suffering because with all of the Trouble that is Going on now in the Middle East, I have Not gone Back to be with him. It has put a big Monkey wrench into our Marriage and at the Moment , we are estranged.
My situation was, I got the Ring but in Living in Another country that May not be Right for you, think it over. He obviously has his own Reasons of the Seasons and may have Considered this as Well, I can Tell. So he is Procrastinating.
You both Need to Talk it out before Anything else Goes on. There needs to be Full commitment on Both Ends.
Good luck. xx0