All my life I've never had a girlfriend up to my age now at 26 years old. I've been told I'm handsome, attractive, and seem to be a decent person. Yet despite this no girl seems to be interested in me or who I am as a person. It really had me questioning if I'm really worth getting to know. I've gotten girls attention from time to time in public, in school they may stare or glance, talk a little but nothing more. To add to this I've never approach a female to try to ask them out. The only time was recently I got to know this girl who was flirty for months but was just toying with me. It really hurt my confidence and now I am back to not talking to anyone and it is crushing me socially and romantically. I go through rollercoaster of emotions when I see couples in public especially my age. What am I doing wrong? Please help me I don't want to grow old alone. By the way to make matters worse everyone I grew up with all my boys are married, engaged, or dating!
Most Helpful Girl
I'm really sorry about the girl that toyed with you. It's really disheartening to be used and to hear about others being used. I hope that never happens to you again.
I think you should ask your boys to help set you up! Their wives/fiancees/girlfriends must know some awesome girls they could set you up with that they trust. There's absolutely nothing wrong with asking for help with this, but if you'd rather do it on your own, you could join groups/clubs/organizations/charities/causes that you have a passion or interest for, and then you can meet others who you have that in common with.
Don't worry about growing old alone. You're not alone. You said you have "your boys", and you may also have family. You still have a lot of time, just don't pick a girl for the sole reason of not wanting to grow old alone. You will only be happy if you're surrounded by good, kind-hearted people.
If you feel that there are areas where you can improve, like living a healthier lifestyle, becoming more confident, etc, then you work on those areas! We're constantly evolving as people. We can't become perfect, so we never arrive at a final destination.1
Most Helpful Guy
I am also 26 and never dated or even kissed. Seeing my classmates posting pictures on Facebook of their weddings and kids brings me lower and lower. And then my family members pushing me towards getting a girlfriend already. Ugh. One thing I like to say to myself and others in a similar situation is to go at your own pace. There is no deadline. Try to avoid comparing yourself to others or the media. It can be really hard especially if it's constantly on your mind. Here are a few things to try:
I try to distract myself by finding something that will keep me busy. Hobbies is one of them. Plus, if your hobby involves being around people or part of a group then you can organize a meeting somewhere. Might get lucky by meeting an interesting girl there.
Try being outside in public more often. Join groups, events, parties.
Find your assets (the good stuff about yourself) and think about how you can use them.
If you end up having a conversation with a girl about something then take it easy and slowly. Like others have said, time and patience plays a big role. I wish you the best.1