Am I wasting my time waiting?

I went on two really great dates with this guy and he definitely seemed interested in me, we kissed passionately after the second date. I instantly felt a connection with him. But the day after our second date he didn't text me at all until I texted him in the evening. After that he never initiated a text until I did. After a few days I thanked him for our second date and would like to do something again sometime and he agreed and if he ever had time because of work. Now it's been over a week since we last spoke and I decided I wouldn't text him until he texts me first but that hasn't happened. What should I do? I really like this guy but I don't know how he feels.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • It is difficult to say for sure realistically, but just going off your positing, I would have to hazard a guess and say you're probably on the right path with your train of thought and if he hasn't gotten back to you by now, then you're not a huge priority in his life, and you could in fact be wasting your time.

    You've done your due diligence and given him the opportunity to make the next move. You've text him and let him know your interest, but he doesn't seem to be taking the hint, and now he's not even contacting you, and doesn't do so unless you initiate the contact first. That doesn't bode well for you being high on his list of interests.

    Of course, that being said, it is possible he really is that busy with work and he would like to get with you, just hasn't had the time and he's dealing with issues in his life that are distracting him right now, despite the potential he made the same connection with you that you did with him. The problem is that those reasons are not excuses for him ignoring you.

    As harsh as it may seem, you need to simply move on and although I would not say forget him, you should instead leave yourself open to other opportunities that may come your way, relationship wise, of course, and not stall your life waiting for him to get back to you as if you are already his girlfriend and you are pining away waiting for him to remember that you're there.

    You are going to do what your heart wants, this is true, and if you really want this guy, it is your choice to wait for him or not as you see it, but my advice is to do what you feel is going to make you the happiest, but balance that desire with a realistic view that life is too short to wait for someone forever. Live your life and be happy. Be satisfied that someone's going to make you a priority as you would do them. That's my bottom line.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I dont get people like this. If you are interested in the person you show interest! This guy sounds like he is playing games. If you haven't heard from this guy in over a week I doubt you will again. People who use work and other excuses as a way to not make plans are full of it. We all have things going on but we make the time for someone we like or dating. Simple as that. Move on. He obviously is immature and doesn't understand what communication is.

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What Guys Said 15

  • I really hate hearing stories like this. It doesn't take long or much to text someone at the end of the day. This is suppose to be the most exciting thing when you meet someone new! Since he can't be bothered I think his interest is minimal at best. If you really want to try for it, I would text again and say how you haven't heard from him and then say it is ok if he is busy, but you would like to see him again. This puts the ball in his court, for the last time!

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  • i think you are wasting your time. even if he was too busy to go on a date, if he was truly interested he'd reach out to you and want to be in communication.

    the lack of communication from him seems to be a sign that he isn't that interested

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  • It its only been a week I would say give it a little more time but not much more then that.

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  • Yes. Obviously he's just not feeling it and doesn't have the balls to tell you straight up, he's distracted with something important, or simply isn't as enthusiastic. This is why you date multiple people at once and keep your options open in case it goes south with one.

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  • Yes, you are. I think that he's not really interested or he'd have made efforts to communicate.

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  • Maybe just ask him if he's busy? Chances are that he's just busy, ya know?

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  • You could ask him how he feels, just... understand, you may not like the answer you get, but... it will let you know what is going on and if you should move on.

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  • It looks like a waste of time and energy for you.

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  • Looks like your fella likes to play games... My advice: don't play.

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  • Yes, move one

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  • instantly feeling connection = he is hot guy with plenty of options.

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  • u are waiting for a mirage

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  • if you don't wait, it shows that you really don't care

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  • Just wait a few more weeks and see what happens.

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  • I hate shit like this. It's like when you feel a connection to someone and they say they'll hit you up but then don't and keep playing mind games. Or it's like when they show interest and you show interest back they flake. I mean you don't gotta be on constant contact with someone but effort has to come from both sides.

    This is why I multi date, had way too many flakes.

    Did you meet this guy from a dating site?

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    • 2mo

      You're so right. Yes from tinder. The thing I don't understand tho is that he seems very mature and not like the type of guy that would flake but I guess I was wrong.

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    • 2mo

      Indeed, i feel like im at fault for what she did.

    • 2mo

      No, you can never blame yourself. Someone people out there just don't know how to stick with one person.

What Girls Said 5

  • Dating is hard. All you can do is show your interest and see if he feels the same, otherwise just continue dating other guys. When one really likes you i think itll be more obvious

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  • Move on, men are assholes, they love playing games. If you felt a connection with him, there are PLENTY of other guys that you will feel a connection with too.

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  • He sounds not interested. Move on.

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  • He doesn't like you like that but doesn't want to say it. I'd move on if I were you

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  • it sounds like he isn't interested. i wouldn't waste your time, just move on

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