How long should a woman wait to have sex with the man she's dating?

This woman berated me yesterday for having sex with a guy I'm seeing "too soon". I waited for four dates.

She said a woman should wait months or else the guy will leave her after he "gets what he wants".

Do you agree?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Did you enjoy it? Did you feel like it was the right time to do it? I'm sure you would answer is yes to those. Thats all that matters. Who gives a fuck what other say and that's really bs. If a guy would leave for that then he wasn't really looking for a relationship at all. I can see having sex on the first date or waiting a few months. It depends on the date, how well you know each other before you started to date, if there's a history. You have all these other factors that these people who say that don't ever consider.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Months? Who waits months to have sex with someone they fancy? Go with your gut and do it whenever it feels right for the both of you. One date, two dates, three dates or 15 dates. You choose between you.

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What Guys Said 20

  • I assume most girls have had sex within the first couple of dates with at least a few of their previous partners. So knowing this, I wouldn't want to wait months. I would prefer she shows the same level of excitement towards having sex with me as she has shown to her previous partners.

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  • It depends. But anything after the first date is good. I see women has desperate and easy if I can get in their pants after one good date.

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  • I say don't listen to the guys on here saying they'll leave you if you don't give them sex after 3 dates- they won't. Here's the thing: guys are pre-programmed to leave after sex; this is obvious with other species and it holds only slightly less true for men. I'm talking about the sub conscious and nothing we directly control. If you have sex with a guy before he gets to know you, a lot of the time they will get bored of you, for a reason they can't quite put their finger on. If he knows you well before sex though, it can be a completely different outlook. So I wouldn't say there is an exact time, but just make sure you and the guy connect on a deeper level before you become overly physical.

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    • 2mo

      very good answer! :)

  • You should have sex before even going on your first date, so you know right then if he wants a relationship or not. Why wait, you could just be wasting your time and then find out that you wasted months instead of a single day on someone who only wanted sex.

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  • She had no business doing that - that's a personal decision.

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    • 2mo

      thank you for saying that :)

  • As long as she wants and feels comfortable with. In dating, sex is dessert, not an obligation.

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  • It's all about the people in the relationship and how they feel about each other. Nobody should tell you what to do with your body. I do feel that you should know the other's intentions and yours before you do engage in such activities though to keep from causing yourself unnecessary pain and suffering if you are both not on the same page...

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  • Depends on her age and experience. The spectrum ranges from till martiage to six hours.

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  • There is no such thing as too soon or too late. It all depends on individual.

    The only risk of having sex too soon is that a commitment has not been established. So there is a danger of developing feelings at a vulnerable stage.

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  • seriously, women need to stop thinking that all men want 'just sex' because thats not true.

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  • It depends in you. Whatever feels right :)

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  • Two days. Seriously, a woman should be able to decide without any sort of rules.

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  • Nah there is no specific time limit, just when you feel comfortable enough with the guy

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  • No. I have a quote to this effect on my profile. A guy who actually gets what he wants will come back for more.

    Four dates is not too soon! My best and longest relationships have gone sexual sooner than that.

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  • If there's chemistry, the first date. The woman sounds very bitter towards men because they would leave due to her shitty personality and/or must be very bad in bed.

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  • No. for me, no sex by third date, there is no 4th date. Tell the busybody to f' off

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  • Whenever you feel comfortable but if a girl makes it a habit of literally screwing every guy on the first date, especially from online then I'd get a little skeptical.

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  • If he's going to bolt after he gets what he wants, might as well sleep with him date 2 and be rid of him faster, as opposed to wasting months first. If she's right.

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  • I totally disagree with your friend. I would think she finds me repulsive or doesn't like me or something, if she waited such long time.
    there are no rules

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  • 1-2 days

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What Girls Said 5

  • I had sex with my boyfriend the second time we hung out and we have been together a long ass time and have a daughter together. There's no such thing as too soon, if the times right then the times right.

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  • That depends on her

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  • How ever long she wants to wait or not wait.

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  • 3-5 months

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  • However long you want. A guy that will leave her after he "gets what he wants" will do that regardless of how long he waits.

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