I used to be extremely shy. My parents are strict: so I couldnt go out to the movies (until now, I'm 17), go on sleepovers (even if it was all girls), watch more than 30min of tv a day, sit with my peers (I had to sit with my parents), date...🙄 On and on. I didn't get a phone till last year and I've been homeschooled all my life. I guess you could say I got a lot of attention from the guys so the girls either hated me and thought I was stuck up. I was too shy and didn't show any interest in the guys that flirted/liked me. I've never dated or been kissed. My focus is on being successful scholastically and making myself a better person. I am building up my confidence and when I force myself to reach out and make friends and most people that know me well like me. Because girls tend to glare at me and guys stare but don't approach me, I am as kind as possible and don't brag about anything (clothes, school, boys etc).
So I'm kinda interested in dating and guys lol but I don't know if any of them are interested in me anymore. Several guys have pursued me for years, flirted with me but gave up, play hot and cold etc. do they just consider me a challenge? Do they stare at me because they like me or just to look? Do they not approach me because they think I'll say no or cause they don't like me? I've watched my friends go through bad guys so I can tell when a guys a player. I'm talking about nice/regular guys that do this. It's I'm graduating next year so maybe when I go away to college... cause I'm stuck in a complicated situation. Help!
- They think you're lesbianVote A
- They think you're stuck up so they give you spaceVote B
- They like you but they hide their feelings because they don't want you to reject themVote C
- Nothing. They just move on with their lives.Vote D
- They like you but they think you're a goody too shoes church girlVote E
Most Helpful Guy
I think that you sounds a lot like several of my female freinds from church. They are putting their schooling and God first but the do want to date. In our church not to many people do date. Mostly because well we know that were not compatible. That being said there are only about 20 of us regulars and about 20 more non regulars. I also hear that a lot of the guys are a bit to pressured to date the right girls. Recently there was a big drama in the group where my freind started dating a toxic girl and it took a year for him to realize that after 5 of us warned him about it. After he was down but he got right back up and into dating but several of the guys put to much into worrying about choosing God's one to date and not to mess up and date the wrong one for a while. Making the girl wonder why no one is asking them on a date. However that is not really the right way to look at it. Even our pastor had a message about dating and he told us that there is not just one person for you but several that you will love in your dating life. Most won't be the correct person for you and you will realize it. When you find a person that you see yourself being with then she is most likey someone that you will probably marry.
If you see a guy that you like in church, flirt with him and let him know that you like him. Hopefully he will be able to have the courage to ask you out.
With guys alway let them know what your looking for. Are you looking for a husband, a relationship, a one night stand? Tell them that if they want into your pants that they will have to marry you. Right then that gets rid of a lot of guys who just want into your pants. For the players that want a challenge be serious about it. Don't let him do anything to you and don't be alone with him or his freinds.
In college study but save time for friends and dating it makes it a lot easier because you can let off steam and pressure by just being with other people.
There are good men looking for women like you.
As for the hot and cold guys. I'm guessing that if you were dating them that you did not give them enough encouragement to continue dating you.- Not in a sexual way but just in dating is a give and take relationship just like love is.
For the guys that have just liked you for years they might have been waiting for a sign that you liked them back before asking you out.
I wish you good luck and good hunting. If you want any more advice on your other questions you can follow me or message me.1
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Most Helpful Girl
Nothing, they just move on0