What to do with guys who are players?

I've made out with this guy twice - I know he wants to have sex but I only do that with people I have an emotional connection with and told him that it takes time for me, and he said it's fine anyway, probably because I've been really sexy with him. He's in a frat, is pretty attractive, checks out lots of girls, etc etc, but he's been texting me and asking me to hang out regardless of my rules on sex. He doesn't really ask me about myself often, so I get bored.

I've matured a lot and I don't have time for games or bullshit with guys, ever. How can I test if there's a real connection or if he's just a stupid player to avoid?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Players manipulate people's emotions and feelings , so you'd need to always be one step ahead of his own game if you want to continue seeing him. That can drain you emotionally and take its toll on you in time

    You need to set boundaries and let those be known to him, if he tries to intentionally cross your boundaries, or acts disinterested in you after knowing them, then you know there's no emotional connection there

    If he knows you'd only have sex with a guy who you have an emotional conncection with then he'll probably try to manipate your emotions. Getting you into bed will be an achievement for him, because players love a challenge. It helps then to " up", their game and become more deceptive

    To be honest, I'd avoid him. Even if he settled down and quit being a player he'd still always be a manipulator. If a person is manipulative then it's a trait they'll always have. It's part of who they are. I despise manipulators. They are the worst type of people. They have no regard for other people's feelings.

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 4

  • They are both players so they are useless. If you let them, they will toy with your feelings fuck you and bounce. The second guy is a player but is a little more smooth about it, but still a player.

    Basically, with guys like that just keep them around if they can do something for you. Never have sex with them but use them for free dinners, drinks, and talk to them when your bored. If you need them to help you move, borrow money and other things like that. Use the guys that are trying to use you and only take good guys seriously.

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  • Gosh ur case 80% is like mine.
    The difference is, he doesn't ask for sex and can't even think about that, bcoz my rule is sex before marriage. But he is really patient waiting.

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  • Play along

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  • The fact that he doesn't ask much about you is a red flag.
    Try to see if he cared to ask you about your life, like what you do, what you like, stuffs about you.
    And just listen to your gut.
    I dated a guy who wasn't that into me yet asked me million questions about me though.. Yet there's no spark between us..
    And the guy I'm seeing now we made out n almost had sex on our first date, well we eventually had sex on our second date but I just knew he wasn't after only sex. he treated me right and i could see he was into me.. It just felt right.
    So look for something like that. If your guy makes you doubt about things and worry, that's not good. I know it's not going to help you much but really.. Listen to your gut..

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