Girls, how long does it take you to know if you're into a guy or not?

Do you get a feeling after just 20 minutes on a first date of whether you want to see him again? Or does it take multiple dates for you to make your mind up? This could include either sexual or mental attraction, or whether he has relationship potential.

Basically how soon do you decide how you feel about a guy?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Well life, sexual attraction is like two parts. Physically, we know immediately. But like, mentally is just as important so at least I don't know if I'm really attracted to a guy until we've spoken.

    But like, that's relatively quick. Whether or not we see potential for a relationship and stuff is another matter, and that takes a while. For me at least.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think girls make up their sexual attraction within seconds of seeing you...

    Mental would take longer, maybe a few good dates...

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What Girls Said 21

  • The conversation has to flow. I have to have an emotional connection with you to see if I like you or not. I do trust my gut and usually it's right weither I'm attracted to you or not. I really don't go by physical attributes because look do fade with time.

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  • I can tell right away if there's a spark, but that spark is only the initial green light which can soon be turned off by a terrible personality, upbringing or anything else that's negative.

    Truly knowing whether I like the guy or not - after I get to know him, so that could be a couple of months even.

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  • Usually it depends on the girl. Some girls wear their heart on their sleeve, others take some convincing. but it Usually falls into this basic pattern (with added complexity due to an individual girl's history with men, preference, etc.)

    1.) Wow he's hot! I wonder what else he has!

    2.) Omg he has a great personality too! (make it or break it. Friend or Boyfriend material?)

    3.) a.) Friend- (takes a looong time but she'll wake up in the middle of the night or something and realize they like them)

    b.) looking for a boyfriend and takes a very short amount of time compared to the "friend-zone".

    ^-^ Hope this helps!

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    • 2mo

      Thanks, I'm just a little confused by what you mean on 3a and 3b?

    • 2mo

      It means depending on the girl, you have Two routes it can go in. :)

  • For the last guy, I only saw him as a friend at first and I gradually developed feelings for him. I'm not sure when i realized my feelings. For the guy i like now, it happened when we'd just met. We spent an hour dancing and chatting, and I already liked him. So, it depends. Every experience is different.

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  • Right away, like immediately when I see them I know if I'm attracted to them or not but then it usually takes another couple of "dates" to tell if they are relationship material, which usually they are not :P

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  • I can determine immediately just about if I'm attracted to him. If I'm attracted to him, and we have a conservation sometimes I can decipher from that pretty quickly if I'm interested in getting to know him more. But if I decide I am interested in would take me a lot more conversations to be certain how interested I am.

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  • It took me a few weeks honestly only because I was scared. But I told him something that always makes some guy leave " I'm not really ready for sex, and I'm telling you this just in case you like to have sex " when he asked me out again after I told him, I thought to myself maybe he's the one. But I did feel an instant connection on our dates. That's why I had to tell him the truth before it goes any further

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  • Looks wise, it takes me seconds to know if I like him or not.
    Personality wise, I'd spend a month or two getting to know him better.

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  • Like 5 minutes.

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  • It takes me only 10 minutes of conversations to know. Then I go day by day. I probably would say I had a crush on a person until maybe around a month or longer just because I don't like to get my friends all excited and then I find something that would be a deal-breaker.

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  • It totally depends, sometimes its gradual attraction and sometimes its basically love at first sight. Its also dependent on if its physical attraction, or emotional attraction so this all depends on the individual and their standards

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  • Around a month at least. Between 1 to 3 months in general.

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  • I usually fall for friends and know them well before we start dating. It takes me about 5 minutes to decide if they're attractive, but it takes me weeks to months to fall for a guy. Can also take even longer.

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  • Usually I know I like someone from the moment I see him. Of course the way he talks later on and the way he carries himself plays a vital role on whether I like him or not... For example I might like someone a lot but as I get to know him better find out he has the worst attitude or habits.. That can easily change my mind..

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  • I can tell if I'm physically attracted to him upon seeing him for the first time. But emotionally is another matter. That usually takes a few dates for me because it honestly depends on how well he can hold a conversation and how much he reveals about himself.

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  • Years, honestly.

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  • If I feel nothing on the first date, I don't contact him again.

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  • It takes like 10 min tbh.

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  • First date would be the indicator if i want to see the guy again.

    I met this guy and as soon as I sat, there was a connection already. It was funny cause we didn't expect it and we've already had 3 dates so far and we text everyday :)

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  • Actually the first impression is important.. so I may just like him or not.. than I start knowing him... But generally if I liked him in the first 15 MN I won t change my mind

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  • I don't know... sometimes 10min and sometimes 1year

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What Guys Said 1

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