If I'm not his type, but he seems interested in me...what should I do?

so I started talking to this guy and I noticed that he has crushes on light skinned women.. he has a crush on Zendaya, Jessica Alba, Jennifer Lopez and other light skinned celeb women. it makes me feel uneasy because I feel as though he lowered his standards for me because im more of a light brown skin color which isn't near the skin tone of his crushes.. it only bothers because I feel he rather talk to someone of his "type" but isn't only because he hasn't had the opportunity to.. what should I do?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You're making assumptions that are probably wrong. Has he ever actually said that you're not his type? Most guys like all different types of women. Yes those women might be his general preference but if he seems interested in you then HE IS. If you're that unsure, TALK TO HIM about it. Don't make assumptions. I generally like pale skinned women but it doesn't mean I will only date or go out with them. In the end it's about the person, not strictly looks. And if a guy is into based strictly on looks then you are better off without him anyway.

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    • 2mo

      Plus, these are celeb's and "don't count" because he's got no chance with them. It's like if you had a thing for Brad Pitt (or whomever might be your younger equivalent to him lol), doesn't mean that's your ONLY type and won't date regular or different guys.

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    • 2mo

      You'll know. If he doesn't really seem interested in you personally or your life. Don't go into this assuming you aren't his type either. You could flat out ask him right off the bat and see what he says. Something like "hey, I don't think I'm your type, why did you agree to go out with me?"

    • 2mo

      ok thanks ☺

Most Helpful Girl

  • A lot of people have crushes on people that don't look like the type that they date. This guy has had a crush on Victoria justice and I look absolutely nothing like her but he still had a crush on me too. I don't think you should worry about it at all. If it makes you uncomfortable, self conscious or insecure I suggest walking away. It's not health for you at all to feel that way. It can make you do things you wouldn't think about to do otherwise.

    My ex told me once that I wasn't his type at all which hurt so bad. After we went on a few dates and were actually a couple he told me this. I didn't know what to think. Did he think I was ugly? He said he didn't. Literally everything about me though was not his type I'm into piercings and tattoos he hates them. I was pretty insecure I was changing everything about me to be perfect for him. I stopped doing my hobbies because he liked other things. He never posted pictures of us he never told him friends we were together I never met his family even tho they wanted to meet me. We were never Facebook official. It turns out he was embarrassed of me he was worried what his coworkers would think of me (which he told me that before). He has a new girlfriend and all he does is brag about her like crazy. His fb is covered with her where he only posted one pic of us on fb.

    Don't date the guy if it makes you insecure. If you guys have things in common and get along well he just has some crazy celebrity crushes it's okay. Don't change anything about yourself for this guy or any guy. Make sure he treats you like a million bucks. If he doesn't want to show you off to his friends or family he most likely is embarrassed of you.

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    • 2mo

      It's not the fact that he has crushes on celebrities... I know everyone has a celebrity crush.. it's the skin tone that I'm talking about.. he likes girls light skin... I'm not light skin.. and I'm not insecure either.. I don't know where you get that from.. if you were insecure in your personal experience.. thats just you... I'm not insecure.. I just don't want to waste my time with this guy.. thats why I'm worried.. and what do you mean embarrassed of me if he doesn't show me off? I had no concern of that.. my question wasn't about if he doesn't show me to his friends/family or not..

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    • 2mo

      why do I need luck?

    • 2mo

      that's real funny how you think I'm immature and what not.. but you decide to go back and forth with me.. you are 30 years old.. true?

What Guys Said 2

  • I have a crush on a black woman but that doesn't bother my girlfriend who is white because she knows I'm interested in her, and isn't insecure

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    • 2mo

      are you implying that I'm insecure?

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    • 2mo

      @enis_Penvy I was asking you that question

    • 2mo

      I did get notified about this so excuse me for thinking you were talking to me..

  • Go by his actions, not your perceptions. That's what matters.

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    • 2mo

      thank you

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    • 2mo

      I wouldn't say you're insecure; you're just trying to figure out what to do.

    • 2mo

      exactly.. but another guy and others on here wanted to argue with me and say that I'm immature.. me being insecure is not true.. and I was trying to tell him and others that.. it was really crazy...

What Girls Said 2

  • I think you should only be his friend. If I found out that a guy was interested in me and im not his type, I would find that suspicious and friend xone him. Some guys do that when they can't get what they want, so they come for those that are available and when they finally get what they want, they will leave.

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    • 2mo

      yea that's exactly how I'm feeling.. but a lot of other people are saying I'm insecure as an answer to my question but I'm not insecure.. even tho i want to eventually be more than friends with this guy.. i guess thinking of him as just a friend would be a good defense mechanism? just for now?

  • No you are very wrong. Light skinned women are just his preference. That's all. Don't consider yourself less or feel insecure about it.
    He found you attractive, he likes you for who you are.
    I prefer Mediterranean guys, but the guy I been seeing is mixed Indian. He's not my ideal looking guy, but I still find him cute and other qualities of him make me attracted to him more.
    My ex was Italian and he had a thing for tanned blonde girls. And I'm not. And that made me worried once, but at the end, he confessed that I will always be the love of his life. Look is not everything. Give him a chance see how it goes.

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    • 2mo

      but I don't feel insecure even though I felt he lowered his standards.. it's just that I don't want to waste time on a guy who isn't really interested.. I just don't want to be used as someone to past time.. you know what I mean?

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    • 2mo

      how do I know if he honestly likes me for me and isn't a jerk or something. I barely know him

    • 2mo

      I know I shouldn't let my past affect other new people in my life.. but I had time when this guy used me for entertainment purposes and wasn't really interested and it went on for 9 months before I found out and he put me through a lot within those months.. now I'm cautious about who I give my time to.. I don't want to be used for any reason.. .. I don't want to take this out on him but at the same time I want to protect myself.

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