i love my boyfriend I swear he's like my soulmate and best friend in one , I even like the rest of is family aunts , dad , siblings I think they're all great people. But literally being around his mom for some reason I count the seconds until she leaves the room, talking to her always feels forced and for some reason I feel like she feels the same way even though she's cordial / nice to me. The family is really close so I would probably be around her for hours like 3-4 days a week. Should I break up with him for this reason? She just drains my energy for some reason it's just like a bad vibe thing i guess.
I strongly dislike my boyfriends mom?
What Guys Said 1
That is fine. You don''t have to like his mom, you can like and dislike anyone, that is your choice. I am sure you have your reasons for that.
Now, I don't understand why would you even think of breaking up with your boyfriend whom you say as your soulmate, your best friend just because you don't like his mom? where is your logic in that? at least I can't see any logic.
No, there is no need for you to break up with your boyfriend over this, now it's your choice either you can see and work out a way to keep limited contact with him mom, just enough to keep things smooth or you can continue disliking his mom but either way there is no need to break up with him.
Unless he wants to break up with you over this matter, then it's a different thing altogether but that is not your question.
However does your boyfriend know that you dislike him mom?
If he knows this and is completely fine with you disliking his mom then you shouldn't even entertain the thoughts of you leaving your boyfriend, you are in relationship with your boyfriend and not his mom young lady! and secondly you will have your boyfriend's support so nothing to worry.
However if you disliking his mom is going to be a problem for him then depending on how much he loves his mother, he might consider breaking up with you so if that situation presents itself, you will have to then decide what you need to do. However I hope this situation never arises.
Hence there are two very important counter questions to your question is does your boyfriend know that you totally dislike his mother? and if he knows is he completely fine with this or not?
Once again, you are not wrong to dislike his mother, it's completely your choice as to whom you like and dislike nobody can control that. Not even your boyfriend.0
What Girls Said 3
hey there, right here goes and no offence intended just some experience and perspective, i dont know how old you are whether more 18 or more near 24 but it sounds like you are in a serious loving ltr, you say the whole family is great and actually the mums behaviour is favourable towards you. i can appreciate there is an energy vibe going on between you and his mum and i would bet its kind of like this, she adores her son and she knows as a mum there is a great love and connection between you so it is already and has the potential if not already for him to grow and move on with you in life, live together etc, grow up, as his mother, this will be a massive deal for her emotionally they sound like a sound sort of family, she is trying her best to behave in a way thats new to her as a person in fairness the boy she raised has found a female to replace her and she is trying to respect that... its not easy... you whether you totally understand or not are the young female coming in to play in his life to move him forward and have an almost animal respect for his mother, out of all the family she is the main character to contend with... would you even consider i just felt that you as a young modern woman are quite a confident soul perhaps more so than she im sensing? a mothers true ideal would to be to get along with her sons partner believe me... she sounds to me like she is trying to be reserved and hold back giving you and her son the respect you are grown and are building a future together but she is still his mum so she is struggling with this, it may not be something that you could see as a possibility but could you imagine arranging an outing with her alone to literally be honest with eachother and chat, i really dont believe at all she has any bad feeling toward you, a mum wouldn't hesitate to show it! any feedback always here xx1
I know exactly how you feel as I have been asking myself this everyday of my three year relationship with my boyfriend and his terrible mother. She probably doesn't like you, if you're feeling that way, it's because you're being made to feel that way, never doubt your own feelings, if she wanted to talk and make an effort with you she would. You need to ask yourself if your boyfriend is worth putting up with his unbearable mother for. Take it from someone who's older than you and been dealing with it for longer, it's not easy, you'll have days when you just erupt with emotion either anger or sadness because it's just too much and it makes you doubt everything. Just work out weather it's worth it, because as you said it really is soul destroying/draining.1
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