All the boyfriends I've ever had I've noticed now that I couldn't leave them alone. I would rant to my friends or I would text them 24/7. I would cry if I didn't see them. I'm dating someone new now, and I really don't want to start the progress all over again. How can I cope with it? What are ways to be less clingy? One one the reasons I'm clingy is because I have depression and it can be really hard without someone with me 24/7. PLEASE DON'T JUDGE.
Most Helpful Guy
I have severe depression and severe anxiety too! I am typically high functioning, but in relationships it's pretty obvious. Mainly because... well, for a guy, I'm pretty clingy. It's something I need to work on because I don't think it's healthy. Right now I'm in between relationships, I want to get into another one in the future, but right now, I'm in counseling trying to figure out what is going on in me and I am trying to see if this makes things better.
Let me just say, I have never had a clingy girlfriend but there are times I really wish I had one. It sucks being clingy when the other person is a rather distant person :/
So "clingy" isn't always a bad thing. But a lot of the time, it's generally unhealthy and it leaves us open to a lot of hurt from our partner's, yes? So for me, I'm trying to get better.
I'm trying to:
Focus on my career (I start nursing school in January)
Pump up my ego and self confidence (for me, I tend to think pretty low of myself. I am an incredibly nice guy, but I'm pretty passive and I sort of set myself for being used, so right now I am trying to be the strong, driven, outspoken go getter who I quite honestly want to be)
Build up friendships with people I am not in a relationship with (this is hard for me because usually I form only shallow friendships with people and I am very busy, so finding time is hard)
Engage in more time-filling activities (volunteering, working, studying, playing sports etc. it helps keep me distracted from things)
Probably the thing I'm most proud of is finally taking the step and going to counseling. It's offered free through my school and it is helping me process a lot.
My advice for you is to work on "you".
If it takes going and getting professional help, there is no shame in that. I promise your future relationship partners (and any possibly resulting children) would thank you for that.
Overall, live your life and invest in you. If your life isn't a life that you want to live, then decide to change it. You have that power :)
Remember, you're not depression. You may struggle with it, but it isn't your identity. Keep fighting girl!0