I grew up in a very conservative isolated boring upbringing (im eritrean). My mom only taught us to live for school and work, i was raised strict and she hit us a lot growing up, she also called us nicknames and made comments about our looks. As a result we grew up fucked up, we werent allowed to talk to people and my mom would judge most people and see them as good or bad, im 24 now and i am seriously lost, i only worked and went to school but never had 'fun'. I still live at home and im too scared to move out cause i never knew who i was... I was always scared to lose my family if i did what i wanted but now i regret it, i should have done what i wanted... i feel depressed, i never had a boyfriend, i never had sex because when i made out with a guy i felt dirty and ashamed... a lot of shame... how can get over this and get to know who i am? Is it too late?
I am so depressed?
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What Girls Said 3
My mom had hit me too but not in an abusive way.
And my parents were conservative as well. I lived in town most of the time, and our environment were bad as in kidnapping were common.
And I too had gone to school, came home, played etc.
TBH, you are not lost.
I don't know why I could have felt the same way you did but I just never created such thoughts.
You are you, and you can build yourself/your life the way you want it to be.
What your parents did, etc may have slight effect but once you realize the prob, etc you should work on yourself to not let anything impact you and deter you from the person you can.0
Find friends first. You can only learn about yourself when interacting with others. Get a dog or cat or some animal companion to love and be loved by. Always does the trick for me. Don't do drugs or go out to crazy parties you'll find yourself attracting the wrong crowd (trust me im from America).0
Get some counseling0
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