My boyfriend doesn't let me speak to my best friend because he thinks he's trying to hit on me? Who is right?

I used to have a crush on my best guy friend (let's call him Daniel) and he knows I did and we passed through that stage. My boyfriend at first wasn't comfortable with the idea of me still texting Daniel but he was willing to let it happen. But then Daniel asked to me to go eat somewhere with him. I assumed he asked because we're friends and he wanted to catch up. While my boyfriend thinks Daniel is trying to flirt with me and ask me out on a date. We got into a huge fight over it but eventually I decided to choose my boyfriend over Daniel. Now every time Daniel texts me I have the urge to reply but my boyfriend doesn't let me. Is it unfair? Am I right or is my boyfriend right?
Plus I think Daniel is gay.

Updates:
1mo Honestly I think it's not fair because he's still friends with his past crushes.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • All I have to say is that if you believe it's disrespectful then don't do it. Think about it and put yourself in his shoes, how would you feel if he did the same thing, honestly? Just remember, the grass is always greenest where you water it. Give that guy attention and eventually you'll get more and more comfortable with him to the point that you'll start thinking your boyfriend has you trapped. It's what happened with my ex. She started texting this coworker and I told her I didn't like it but didn't do anything about it. A couple months later she dumped my ass because she wanted to do herself.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't think it's OK to dictate who you can talk to or not. He is your friend and you can talk to him. I understand his concern for alone time though. I personally wouldn't like my partner hanging out alone with a ex crush. I'd be cool with the 3 of us hanging out though or in a group environment. But alone time with a friend is a no no to me and neither me or my boyfriend do it out of respect for each other :)

    But it's not right to completely ban you from speaking to him. This is wrong and insecure of your boyfriend.

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What Guys Said 2

  • I don't really love how it's phrased: "my boyfriend doesn't LET me (fill in the blank)."

    At the same time, you crushed on this dude before and now you wanna hang with him one-on-one? C'mon now. You've gotta understand how that would make your boyfriend feel uncomfortable. If the tables were turned, how would you feel?

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  • Personally I think that any guy should not tell you who or who not you can be friends with.. to me it suggests that he is very insecure.. if you and him are very in tune with one another.. their should not be a problem.. but if and I say if.. there is an attraction to the friend.. then it should be said to your boyfriend by you.. ASAP and that way he will know just where he stands.. honesty in any relationship is a must.. if that is not there.. you have nothing

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What Girls Said 1

  • I think your boyfriend is right. If I were you, I'd invite my boyfriend as well. That would put his mind at ease.
    However, if your boyfriend keeps in contact with his past crushes, that's also incredibly unfair and you should mention it to him.

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