Why are so many women not actually ready for a good guy?

Honest question. They'll put on an act like they are, but based on their choices in guys, they're clearly not.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Erm... Why do you care so much about women who make bad decisions? Doesn't that mean you're also not ready for a good woman?
    Men who chase these women who always chase these shitty guys... I've never quite understood why they think they're any different to the girl or that they make better decisions. Like no, birds of a feather flock together, so when somebody is chasing these dumb people... well...

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Most Helpful Guy

  • 1. Because what many women say they want isn't what they actually respond to in a guy.

    2. a lot of women aren't self aware enough to really know what they want. So you generally have to take what is said, with a grain of salt.

    3. It's common to think about what we want and not what we offer. Sometimes a girl just doesn't feel like she's worth having a guy that treats her well and will gravitate towards bad guys. There's nothing you can do for her, because it's what she believes deep down.

    4. Some girls really are low quality people and she doesn't resonate with a good guy. She resonates with other low quality people.

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    • 1mo

      This 100%. When I was younger I didn't think I deserved a good guy because I felt I wasn't good enough. In my mind I had nothing to offer and things of my past were holding me back. It took a spiritual reawakening to make me feel worthy of a good man, and luckily I found him.

What Girls Said 5

  • you do know that this whole 'nice guys finish last' thing was started by the redpill movement, yeah? ie. a bunch of guys who post on the regular about how evil/manipulative/slutty the girls who weren't interested in them are, right?

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    • 1mo

      I'm not saying girls are slutty or evil, just don't act like you're looking for something serious then turn around and date a wiener just because he gave you some attention. There might actually be a good man in reach right in front of you, but then the girl doesn't react to it.

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    • 1mo

      Yes, "nice guys" are typically manipulative, bitter, entitled, and have no grasp of reality. Good men know their worth and they are confident in what they have to offer. OP doesn't sound bitter, he's just made a realistic observation. He knows he's a good man but questions why some women front. And he's right, there are lots of women who claim they want a good man but at the end of the day they chicken out.

    • 1mo

      @OjosOscuros2 true, I'm sure many 'good men' are turned down quite often. Which sucks but would apply for anyone getting turned down. It's not like being 'good' makes one any more deserving of a females attention than a jock or whatever would be.

      Unless you're into giving 'good guys' a pity fuck because they're behaviour is too saintly for you to stay away from. In which case.. You do you, I'll do me.

  • Honestly sometimes we just get screwed over by the douche bags who trick us into thinking they're good. I personally like good guys though. 😇

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  • they should become friends first, know each other better, and then love comes

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  • Did you just get rejected?

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    • 1mo

      No it's just that nothing has ever happened for me, despite finding reasonable successes everywhere else in my life.

  • I don't think it comes down to logical choices, but rather being unclear about what level of treatment we deserve. Women love good guys - trust me. And respect to you for being one. But I discovered this irony when I experienced it myself once - a good guy was interested in me but I spent more time thinking about the guy who never made me a priority. I realized what it came down to was my sense of self worth. It became more important for me to win the approval of the jerk because his rare attention would validate me more. That was a dark realization.
    Don't take it personal - it's not about you. Honest answer.
    Thanks for being a good guy - we truly need more.

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What Guys Said 3

  • They want hot and fun. Unfortunately the "good guys" who would be interested in a serious relationship aren't typically as hot and fun as the guys who just want to pump and dymp them.

    Looks have the most influence over how successful you will be in getting girls whether it be for a casual fuck or a serious relationship.

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  • Most women in their teens and 20s are very stupid when it comes to picking guys that they say they want to be with. If you're not a really attractive douchebag, then prepare to either wait, lower your standards, or get really lucky.

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  • Honestly I think an equally good question would be why labeled "good guys" tend to be so dull. You don't need to be dangerous or an asshole to make her heart beat faster when you come near. A little mystery and confidence, a few enigmas to your personality. It doesn't take much.

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    • 1mo

      I'm really not that dull, just not incredibly charismatic.

    • 1mo

      You know I like you. You didn't go on a rampage or anything. So here's a small small tip. Keep her guessing. Sure let her know you're interested but don't go head over heels from the start. Hold back a bit, tease a little. Let her know that you're the real catch. Few people want to date a puppy.

      It is the little things, not changing your whole personality. Its the part where you, after nibbling her neck, lean up to hear ear and whisper "So everyone knows you're mine." Bit corny, but it is the right type of exciting.

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