How long to wait before having sex?

I met a guy a week ago and we have been inseparable - we have seen each other 5 days out of 7 on both dates (drinks/dinner) and just hanging out. There has been an intense connection there from the start, loads of chemistry and we get on well - he has told me he is really excited by what we have started etc. The only snag is that he is separated and about to go through a divorce which makes me naturally a little cautious, although I'm feeling the same feelings he does. Although things are starting to get hot and heavy now, we haven't actually slept together yet and it will likely happen around the 2 week mark. On the third date he said he was happy to wait if I wanted to.

I really want to sleep with him but there is a part of me that feels I should wait just a while longer to get to know him better. The waiting wouldn't be to play games. I suppose I'm conscious of instant connections and don't really want it to fizzle out. What do you think?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Lol, I've never understood that whole women's thing of trying to get a bead on general direction before sex. If you wanna boink him, just boink him. Women spend too much time contemplating and making rules. You purposely force yourself to wait for a time frame to commit a simple act. then by the time you do it, he's worn out chasing it, or heaven forbid, its horrible for one of you and then there is a split due to disappointment and the excuses come out.
    My motto is get it out of the way. Its been only a week and you wana do it, do it. Then you will have solved TWO problems, if he leaves or things fizzle out, now you know what the deal is. If he stays and things are still pretty intense, now you know too and you also know if the sex is any good. Get it over with and get it out of your mind.
    As far as i see, this seems like a physical attraction (hopefully not a rebound)... either way. Get yours while its hot.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Good idea. Wait it out until you feel comfortable. The guy sounds like a good catch. Most guys are pressuring women to give it up, or if they sense you are one not to give it up they are off to someone else. And lets say that you do wait it out, there is no gurantee that down the line he will be the same nice caring guy or even be faithful. Dating is tricky

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What Guys Said 4

  • I see no point in waiting any further. If it is something you both would enjoy, and you're both available, why postpone pleasure? Also, it is better to find out if you are sexually compatible before either of you invest too much time. If all you two have is sexual tension, and no intellectual/emotional connection, you'll find that out fast -- otherwise, enjoy your bodies!

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  • From what I read it sounds like you're ready but you just a bit nervous. Personally, I say tear off the Band-Aid.

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  • When you're married.

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  • 2 weeks

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What Girls Said 1

  • till marriage

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