Why am I single?

I get told on a daily basis by strangers that I'm pretty, at least once a day. Guys flirt, but don't actually ASK me out, and when one does he's married😝😠😩😬. I think I'm pretty and I hold myself with confidence; More importantly I'm a sweet girl and I'm funny (or should I say goofy/silly.. lol) . Yeeeettt only married men or someone I'm uninterested in approaches me. Why? I'm initially shy and afraid of rejection -so me asking a guy out is not possible. I'm AA but I only really like white guys... those are the ones who flirt, but they don't take it further. Black men have said (n i don't agree) that I'm "out of their league.) I know my post sounds borderline arrogant, and I'm not. I just don't understand if I am physically attractive n i am a good person with a big heart, why am I single? I'm not desperate to be in a relationship, but this weather (fall) definitely makes me want to date. How can I make myself approachable? Lol


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Most Helpful Guy

  • need more info, but normally when a girl has a small rack she has a nice ass. that is a different group of guys, but there are plenty of white guys also who like booty.

    but basically as a few people alraedy said u need to just make urself more available to others. there are dating or what ever its called tips u can study online that can teach u how to appear more available to others and thus more likely to be approached by guys. in this day and age u want to look as friendly and open as possible, and i wouldn't do the drunk thing, but i would even try to muster up some fake courage some where and try to ask some guys u like out. let them know u are shy and its was a one time thing so they have the ropes after the first date ;) if the date goes well that is. i had a chick do this to me recently and i was greatly amused by her actions lol.

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    • 1mo

      I have the "Irish curse" ... big boobs... not so big ass and I'm skinny... both my parents are biracial. Black and Irish... I was told that white men that date black women want girls with really dark skin... well, people assume I'm Hispanic bc i have curly hair n I'm light skin... lol guess I should be more bold.

    • 1mo

      But It's like someone snatches my voice out of my throat when I try to... lol... I become far too shy

    • 1mo

      but plenty of guys think that is cute as well, when a girl approaches and then gets shy. the major problem is showing interest. so by coming over and trying to start something the guy will know u are interested. now while 100% of guys will not like u, u can't make 100% people happy. that is something u will just have to learn even as a chick, u will probably have a pretty good success rate honestly. thuoght u said u were AA? how is that big boobs? now im confused. but half black can mix well with a lot of other races and look cute. its fairly rare for me to be attracted to a black girl, though i am from time to time. i see plenty that i know are half. funny thing is most play down that they are half black. though i guess i understand why. and most people are not going to havea problem with u being skinny, so over all it sounds like u are very attractive, which might be another reason why u need to help urself to kickstarting ur relationships.

Most Helpful Girl

What Guys Said 19

  • I'm going to suggest to you what I suggest to my female freinds. Which is to try and flirt more, show guys that your interested in them. Talk more about dating with your freinds. When a guy flirts do something obvious that lets him know your interested in him also. Don't do something that will risk your heart but just something like maybe a few well placed compliments.
    Your goal is not to be approachable your goal is to connect with guys that do approach you.

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  • Shyness and fear aren't exactly welcoming. It's really not impossible for you to ask a guy out. It only is if you make it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

    Lose the shyness and fear, for one. Otherwise, you'll have to use your brain and do some thinking about what else it could be. Introspection.

    I would also add that females have a tendency to think they never get asked out, because they completely ignore the guys who do ask them out, as if they don't exist. Saying "I never get attention," when they really mean, "I never get attention *from the type of guys I want*."

    Whether or not that relates to you, you would know. In that case, if you really are bone dry, then maybe make a compromise and go with a guy who you wouldn't normally choose and just try it out. Or, if the standards are too high, then determine exactly what type of guy you want and what type of girl that type of guy would want.

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  • s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/.../...9e1b9a6df7.jpg

    Probably because you have set standards that are out of your own reach.

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  • I have the same problem (but I am younger than you according to your age on this site) but I dont know what is. I am shy too , everyone compliments me but when I ask the same person out she says that I deserve sth better (they politely reject me). YOU should wait for the one , at least you are not a men and you dont have to deal with the womens children if you get together with a married (divorced one) ... Dont be satisfied with someone just because you know you should be, dont follow your brain (at all). You will find someone with the time , dont be too desperste or at least dont show it , get over your fears and take a risk with the love life and men! :)

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  • "I know my post sounds borderline arrogant, and I'm not."

    Well this was one of your sentences, hence maybe your personality gives a vibe to guys that you are arrogant. I am not sure but that could be just one reason.

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    • 1mo

      Lol I'm to shy to even be that way. Yesterday I was told, "awww and she's shy.." and he winked at me... I got a call on my phone and I walked away... lol

    • 1mo

      As far as I know guys do like shy girls, so If you are not giving any arrogant vibes, I am not sure what it can be then.

  • Hi, I'm a white guy and my SO is AA, and the most likely problem is that white guys and black guys tend to have different cultural expectations. I know that we're all people and all Americans, but even so, there are differences in how you approach girls and how they accept your approach. Also a lot of white guys are afraid to approach black girls because they're afraid that they are going to be rejected - hard.

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  • Because you are not interested in the guys who do ask you out. I'm not saying you have to lower your standards but maybe some of those standards are nonsensical when you think about it.

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  • Because you don't make a move for people you are interested in, even though you are getting older which means your dating pool is gradually decreasing

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  • Take the initiative and ask/talk to guys you're interested in. Don't wait for them.

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  • Well if you are attractive like you say you are. Then guys general won't approach you. They'll see you as intimidating and not being single. I'm just a dart in the wind blown majestically into your face 😏

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  • Just from my point of view. The more prity u are u have some shit wrong with ur ass. Weather it's additude or personality or u are just a snobby bitch. I had good friends good looking great people but they think no one is better then them they think every thing the to is perfect. As there just walking around being nasty to every one and then people talking behind there back.
    Not saying u but that's my thought

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  • What race are you?

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    • 1mo

      Black... well almost.. most assume I'm Hispanic.. both my parents are biracial.

  • Unsolved mysteries

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  • Cause your too hot for us we can't handle you too hot to to handle you'll rock our mantle.

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  • I'm going with RBF

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  • Because you're picky AND you wait for something to happen.

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  • People tell me pretty therefore they must ask me out.

    Thats not how life works.

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    • 1mo

      I know, but I'm too afraid to do it. :(

  • I don't know why you're single but, I'm single because I just can't handle being a relationship right now. She just wouldn't want to be around me at this point in my life... but, trust me, I could def. make it happen, if I wanted to

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  • A) Picky with races

    B) Fear rejection

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What Girls Said 2

  • Lol. I know what you mean!! I don't know maybe we are to independent. Lol

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  • Well, first, being pretty doesn't mean anything. If guys flirt with you and don't ask you out, it's because you don't have the personality they want.

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