Girls, how would you feel about a man who's hired an escort as a way to get past his social anxiety with women?

I often hear that women say they'd never date a man who pays for sex. I also hear advice from men saying that hiring an escort got them past their social anxiety, and have been more comfortable around women ever since.

How would you feel about men who hire escorts to get them over the hump?


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What Girls Said 3

  • That he is going about it all wrong and I'd doubt that was anywhere near healthy... he should be seeing some kind of Dr, or councilor for anxiety.

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    • 27d

      I read many first hand accounts from men in my position who've hired just 1 escort, and their social anxiety had improved dramatically, much more than therapy ever could. Real life intimacy with women seems to open your eyes, as apparently you begin to see women in a different light; that they're regular people and there's nothing to be afraid of. Of course, I can't feel that way without the experience, and I can't get the experience without putting myself out there and risking embarassment. This way, I skip the rejections and embarassments, and get to the finished product

    • 27d

      Yeah I can't see this working for you nor teaching you anything about intimacy or women. Your buying a woman and treating her like a sex objection. There is not imtacy she is touching you because she has to because it's a her job, she could be cringing on the inside) not to mention they kind of do and say whatever they think you want even if it's not realistic at all. Not to mention if most woman find out about it most wouldn't date or respect you because of it but to each their own... be careful and really think this through before you do it...

  • He should be getting some therapy along with plowing prostitutes, or it's just a charade to avoid putting effort into real two-sided sexual encounters, with a "I'm healing myself" veneer to make him feel better about it.

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    • 27d

      It's really just a 1 time thing. Many people on the social anxiety subreddit have suggested it to me, because you actually begin to see women differently after the first time. That they're really just people and there's nothing to be afraid of. It'll also relieve all the tensions of being a virgin.

    • 27d

      I get the concept, but you're not really paying her to welcome or enjoy sex with you, just to permit it. So that doesn't really translate to real sex.

      Also, she may or not react in a way you feel is positive... she could be mean, for instance. You're paying her to let you penetrate her, not to build your confidence. So you still can't know what may happen. If your anxiety is bad enough, you'll find something to get hung up on to torture yourself no matter what.

      So I can see it going either way... it's a castle of sand. Gotta attack the anxiety at the root to defeat it - cognitive behavioral therapy, for instance.

  • If you have social anxiety, how can you feel comfortable enough to hire an escort?

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    • 27d

      I don't. It's nerve racking, but with escorts, I can practice getting over my fears without having to worry about rejection. With standard women, I feel if they sense a slight hint of fear, I will be avoided like the plague.

What Guys Said 4

  • Most will be extremely negative about that. If you ever do hire an escort then make that a secret you take to your grave (just consider it a male equivalent of women who divide their partner count by 3 when asked about it :-) )

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  • You can always hire an escort and then never mention it ;)

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  • How old are you?

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  • I'd congratulate him for keeping his self respect.

    Hoes are the most honest women.

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