Should I wait or run- there's a 5 year difference?

I have been hanging out with my ex from 3 years ago (first love) for 8 or 9 months now, being exclusive, not interested in anyone else.

Recently I met a guy, while my ex has been out of the country. He's 5 years younger yet everything is perfect, our chemistry, our connections, just everything. The only thing that stands out is the age and I mean, my history with my ex keeps popping in my head. My ex comes back in a week, and this new guy wants me to be his girlfriend although we just met like a week ago.

The difference is my ex and I have been exclusive, yet, with the history we have, we're not official and we're STILL building our trust with eachother.

I'm afraid when my ex gets back in town, I'm going to resort to the usual pattern with him, but I'm not sure what to tell this new guy. Should I just tell him to take our time and see what happens; should I mention my ex or should I just plainly say let's take our time?

Am I the only one that's bothered by a 5 year age difference in a potential relationship especially when the woman is older?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Crazy, I have a somewhat similar situation. The guy I'm "relating to" is 4 1/2 years younger than me too. So I kind of understand the age thing, but I have gotten over it. It doesn't bother me at all anymore that he is that much younger than me. It doesn't even feel like he is anymore. And as far as your ex thing, that's a really tough one. You need to forget the age and decide which one you feel the deeper or better connection with. Maybe your ex is your ex for a reason and you should not re-live that. Good luck figuring this out.

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What Guys Said 1

  • 5 years difference is a lot, especially when you're young

    22+18 is a bit nasty

    18 is still in high-school

    22 finished college

    two different points in life

    regardless of who is older

    Do you know who Chris Hansen is?

    I say 4 years MAX difference, even if the girl is older or the guy is older, doesn't mater

    I'm 22 and I wouldn't date anybody under 19 (or over 23)

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What Girls Said 4

  • Age is not matter, if a guy willing to date you and go for it. If you let your ex come back to you , you will never move on. Yeah, first love is hard to move on but he did something to you to make you break off with him in the first place. If you like the ways this new guy make you feel then you should give him a chance because he sounds like a great guy.

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  • age doesn't matter and your a lazy dater! I'm sorry if I'm being rude but what is with th ex thing? The point of breaking up is moving on and finding someone fresh. taking time to build trust puhleezzz! girl time to go after the new guy plus think about it it if he really cared he would take the risk so therefore he doesn't know what he wants? how do you know during those times he's not sleeping with someone on the side? there are a lot of you men dating older women. Remember MARIAH CAREY AND NICK CANNON MARRIED IN SIX WEEKS AND HE'S HALF HER AGE! Date him! try something new not the same old thing you went out with before. kinda like going from peanut butter and jelly to tuna sandwiches!

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  • The guy I currently like is 5 years younger than me as well. I turn 24 in October and he turns 19 in November. The creepy part is that he's the EXACT same age as my brother who just graduated high school, so that's a little weird to me, but at the same time. I like him a lot, so I try to not let tha get the best of me, but I think he may be intimidated by our age difference, cause he has yet to make a move on me.

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  • Personally, I think you should become nonexclusive with your ex. You guys broke for a reason and no matter who or why that happened people don't change so the potential of having a good healthy relationship with your ex isn't good. I think you should try the new guy but still take it slow with him.

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