Would a guy do all sorts of nice things just to be friends with benefit with a girl?

Want guys' opinions on this. If a guy does all of the following:

- takes the girls out on nice dates every single time when hanging out;
- pays for everything when goes out with her;
- texts her everyday, telling her about his day and asking about hers;
- flirts with her via texts as well as on dates;
- has amazing sex with her and be very considerate in bed;
- meets the girl twice a week;
- says sweet things (like "you are so pretty", "you are so hot", "I will just kiss you to shut you up" when asked if she was talking too much", etc..);
- lots of PDAs (holding hands, kissing, touching and hugging); when in public, people absolutely think we are deep in love with each other;
- Tries to have breakfast with her after a sleepover even he is running late for work;

A guy I am dating for two months and a half (probably had 15/16 dates) does all of these. But he keeps telling me he likes me, but does not love me and is not sure how he feels about me. When we are together, most of the time we are so happy with each other. But if I give him any slight criticism or bring up the topic of where this is going, he gets super defensive and wants to break it off with me. Then he accidentally revealed to me that he doesn't want to date me, just wants sex.

Any wisdom from guys can help me decode his behavior? Why would he go to the extra to do all those nice stuff for me and with me, but then only wants sex?

Another question, how much does "hotness" of a girl mean to a guy? To be honest I think in terms of looks and hotness, I am 8/9 and he is probably a 6. But he is a smart nerd, which is why I like him so much.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • In my opinion, I believe he likes you more than friends with benefits but not to the point of a relationship, like the middle of both if you will. It seems like he respects as a lady and doesn't want to feel like he is using you but his main purpose is because he values sex extremely high in his life, which isn't wrong. There is a wall that is blocking him from obtaining that level of emotion that you want him on. This could be from trust issues of a past relationship, maybe he doesn't like the responsibility of a commitment, or he just doesn't feel that way towards you. In my opinion, if you like where you are keep at it but don't be surprised if he breaks it off because of someone else. It's gambling 50/50 at this point, we don't know why this wall is blocking him but if it's himself then he may come through if it's you it won't change. So figure out why he doesn't want a relationship and go from there.

    As for your second part, to me personally I believe it's extremely important. I won't date a women who is less than 7/10 and won't marry one unless they are 9/10 or extremely extremely fun and cool to be with. So it is a must, but an 8/9 is great so just stay where you are.

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What Guys Said 4

  • Hotness means a lot. I can't date and ugly girl. And yes men will do anything for sex. They'll be sweet caring loving etc etc just to have a constant fuck.

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  • I think he's more than into "friends with benefits". But he feels some kind of insecurity as I feel. Make him comfortable with you. Build trust. Make him feel that he won't loose you easily. He'll get along...

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  • Yeah if he says he wants only friends with benefits it means he only wants friends with benefits. I do all these things with my fwbs too but that does not always mean I want a relationship. I have never been in a serious relationship

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  • I only do it if she already said no to me asking her to be my girlfriend and if I don't care much for her or just tryna get my dick wet tbh

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What Girls Said 2

  • well you can date without being in love, but to answer your question many guys will do many things for sex.

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  • It sounds like he's being honest, he doesn't want a relationship... he does sound really involved though wow.

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    • 17d

      And... your description of him was funny and a bit mean, but if it's true then he might not get sex often. So it could be a huge priority to him.

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