Which kind of cheating would you find worse?


Of course, everyone agrees cheating is bad. But I think there are different kinds of cheating and some are "worse" than others. To see what others think, here are two scenarios:

1. Your partner has been having another girlfriend/boyfriend for months without your knowledge. The other didn't know about you either. Now you've found out, your partner has dumped the other and pledges for forgiveness. But you know the other girl/guy meant a lot to them and probably still does.

2. Your partner likes to party and has had several one night stands with strangers. Assume they've always been safe and he/she has never brought you risk or disease (I want to focus only on the emotional aspect here). He/she doesn't have any feelings for these flings, but obviously isn't very good at controlling themselves.

I'd personally dump both, because in the end they lied to me. But which is worse?

  • 1 is worse
    55%(30)52%(60)Vote49%(30)
  • 2 is worse
    27%(15)26%(30)Vote25%(15)
  • Other (explain)
    18%(10)22%(26)Vote26%(16)
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • It's worse to lie about another person over a long period of time. Some people get drunk at parties and lose control.

    Not a good thing, but it's not like they go to the party with the purpose of cheating, unlike the first example..

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    • Agreed. Both are terrible. But the first is doing it consiously (is that spelled wrong? Im not native) for a long period of time, with plenty opportunities to stop it, while the second one feels more like he makes mistakes often and is too much of an a-hole to care.

    • Yes, to put it in slightly different words!

Most Helpful Girl

  • The first, because it would also make me feel like a complete idiot.

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What Guys Said 25

  • Second one is almost just sexual urges. The first one is an emotional knife in the back lol, that's worse in my book.

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  • Yeah, both are really bad. Nobody wants the whole STD situation with the second option, but the thought of someone I'm in love with having an emotional relationship with someone else would psychologically damage me much more I think... and over a prolonged period of time. Especially if are trying to work it out, your head is gonna eat away at you. One night stands are one thing, but the idea of this mysterious shadow-dude that's been all up in her brain as well as her cooter would send me over the edge of sanity lol

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    • Agreed. I'd dump both, but I'd just feel mad at 2 while I'd feel heartbroken for longer by 1.

  • Nah, both are just as awful. People who cheat have absolutely no self value.

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  • There's no difference; it's just semantics. Cheating is cheating. It doesn't matter who it was with or how many times. The trust is gone and so should the relationship...

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  • They're both equally stupid. Bye bye cheaty pie

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  • i find every kind of cheating worse
    and people who cheat, are just plain assholes

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  • i've been in both situations... ugh

    the sense of betrayal and hurt is the same

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  • I think the 2nd one is worse because it is something they keep doing and can't seem to stop themselves from doing.

    The first one is still bad, but they might have been doing it because they were lacking something in their other relationship.

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  • I don't forgive cheatng regardless of under what circunstances it ocurred, for how long, or with who.

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  • LOL People are still trying to justify cheating. Just different "kinds". ALL cheating is wrong.

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    • Im not trying to justify it. But I would feel more emotionally hurt by the one than by the other. Both are severe enough to break up with of course.

  • Both are equally bad because they are cheating.

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  • For me I say 2 is worse. I can handle emotional immaturity more than a party slut.

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  • Cheating is cheating. To say that there is a worse is acknowledging that there is a best. That's just like saying if a guy/girl cheats with a ugly guy/girl then it's ok and easily forgivable. So there is no worse. Once a cheater, always a cheater.

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  • Cheating is only bad if you get caught or give her a disease, so no, not everyone agrees cheating is bad.

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  • I think serial cheating or cheating with the mistress for a long period are tied for the worst in my books

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  • If I were a woman I would have chosen the second option. But for a man it comes down to the same since it means she no longer loves you. You should check up mytake about it.

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  • Yeah both are awful cause they both lied.

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  • Second because it was treating me like im dumb ass

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  • Either would be a deal-killer, unless we were in an open relationship.

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    • sleeping around in an open relationship isn't cheating, just like having a second relationship isn't cheating in a polyamorous structure where everyone has agreed to the situation. Cheating implies you're doing something you're not allowed to do.

  • 1 would be easier on me because number 2 she would just be called a slut on number 1 she just has feelings for 2 guys.

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  • Second , no doubt for me. can't control herself/himself is hardly an excuse.

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  • Too many people are looking for excuses these days. Cheating is cheating. So, both are equaly bad.

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  • 2 is worse I think

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  • 1
    Filler

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  • They both sound bad, things should be made clear before wasting somones time

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What Girls Said 5

  • 1 is obviously worse since feelings are involved. Both result in insta-dump with me tho. There is no "they want only me now" or "it didn't mean anything". Gross.

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  • They're both terrible but I think 1 is worse because it has more an emotional attachment and 2 doesn't even seem to care

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  • Neither, they are both as bad as each other. Whether or not they had romantic feelings or if they were flings, they still couldn't "control" themselves. If they can't even be loyal, then they're not ready for a relationship. I'd break up with both as soon as I found out.

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  • I went with the first one because it sounds like there may have been an emotional connection, or more than the second scenario. The second one sounds like sex addiction.

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  • One is as bad as the other.

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