Is it acceptable to confront someone while they are ghosting you? I am so lost and confused?


I could really use some help here. I have been talking to/hanging out with this guy for about two months. He moves SUPER slow, and the fourth time we hung out was on Sunday night and he still didn't make a move on me. I was thinking maybe I've had it wrong, maybe he was just looking for a friend? Although he would text me every single day, would buy me dinner, remember small little details about me, etc.

But his inability to even make any kind of move on Sunday was a bit weird to me. He got kind of strange by the end of the night and I couldn't imagine why - we had a really nice time. Monday he was a bit quiet and untalkative - didn't text me the way he normally did. I was still kinda hung up on the fact that maybe he only liked me as a friend, so I asked him what it was that he was looking for. I straight out said, "Have we been hanging out in a friendly way, or have these been "dates"? I dont want to freak you out, or put pressure on this, this is not a "what are we" question, i just want to know where your head is at"

He responded with a long response telling me that he wasn't at all freaked out by the question, they were in fact dates and he is a big fan of mine and wants to learn more about me. He just moves slow and doesn't want to get ahead of himself. I felt better, but the conversation lulled again, causing my questions to resurface.

He texted me yesterday morning, but the convo was weird and brief. He disappeared and hasn't texted me since. I have NO idea what happened in order for things to get weird, even before me asking him about what he wanted. I am so lost and feeling really sad. Should I ask him in a few days what happened?


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What Guys Said 1

  • You know, I'm not sure what's going on there but my instinct would be that he's just not into you. I don't believe in a guy who wants to take things slow. You take things slow because the person isn't intriguing enough for you to want more and more. You take running on a treadmill slow. You take salads slow. You take studying for an exam slow. But this? Never. I know he's a nice guy and you two have fun still, but I think you should look for someone who really wants you as there are no doubt hundreds who would be more than willing to take this guy's place.

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    • 9d

      You're right, and usually thats totally fine. I just hate that he told me he likes me and wants to keep seeing me, but then acts another way. It is the contradiction that has me very confused.

What Girls Said 1

  • I consider that perfectly acceptable. Do so.

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