Why do people try to make you feel guilty about having a preference when it comes to dating?

Not just people on this site... but people in general will try and bully you if you have a preference. They call you names. I am sick of it.


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What Guys Said 19

  • There was a girl who asked a question whether anyone has rejected any girl because of her boob size? The answer could be pretty simple Yes or No. A certain boy said Yes and said he had rejected the girl because of her small boobs. And the girl who was under 18 said his thinking was shallow. I said , very few men will want to select a girl with huge giant size boobs. And she said it is wrong. I told her that Lola Ferrari had died because of big boobs. She still held her view that rejecting any one on account of their boob size irrespective of whether they were very small or too big was a something equivalent to wickedness. So according to her men did not have any choice in this respect.

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  • I have no guilt at all about my preferences. Guilt trips don't work on me

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  • People only don't like it when you use that "preference" as a way to judge people. Maybe you like tall guys, and feel like short guys aren't real men and make them feel that way. Maybe you like a certain race, and make people who aren't that race feel like they aren't good enough for you. I prefer blondes, but have dated mostly brunettes. I'm a boob man but have dated plenty of girls with out big boobs. I have a preference not a standard. There is a huge difference...

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  • I honestly can't say, I have never had anybody express and interest in my preferences dating wise.

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  • There is nothing wrong with preference , better alone permanently , than with a mediocre person. Being a single dad , my " market value " is near worthless , I knew this on taking main custody , so I don't put myself " out there " ... simply too tired to care most of the time

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  • Because it is a very personal rejection. Even if it isn't meant to be hurtful, it is basically saying that you, as you are, are not attractive to me.

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    • 10d

      But not everyone is going to attract everyone. I am fully aware that someone won't be attracted to me. Whether it is my age... height, weight, hair, eyes. That is just life.

    • 10d

      Some people don't take the rejection as well as you.

  • I use this, the color of someone's skin should make as much difference as the color of someone's eyes. As I can have an eye color preference then skin is also. okay.

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  • It's ok to have preferences. We all have them and there is no preference police man policing the situations

    Depends on the situation - however do keep in mind preferences are not the same as racial preferences

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    • 10d

      Preferences are preferences

    • 10d

      I wouldn't say it's wrong to have certain 'preferences' - no one is going to come knocking on your door for having dating preferences...

      But Preferences don't automatically means it's ok to act on them... that choice is yours and yours only to draw a line between you and the rest of humanity. You can judge what is safe as a preference and what isn't. A good rule of thumb is - that if a 'preference' needs to be justified it's probably a grey zone

      Racial preferences in particular is a blurry line

    • 10d

      Well I'm not going to date someone I'm not attracted to.

  • Their immature. The most important thing in life is your happiness. So do you and be picky. Never settle.

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  • Everyone has preferences. Some people like to flame for no reason. Dont mind them.

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  • Because when you have a certain preference. People who don't meet those standards will be offended and feel unworthy and insecure. It will make their self esteem go down.

    For example if I say my preference is skinny girls. Big girls will feel insecure. I'm a man who can't grow a beard. When girls said they love men with chin straps I use feel inferior when I heard that.

    Am I making sense?

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    • 10d

      Yes... but the point is... everyone has a preference. And no one should be crucified or have to justify it.

    • 10d

      Yes you are more than right. It's not until recently I realized I shouldn't be ashamed of myself if I don't meet a woman's standards.

      U can't help what we find attractive and what we don't find attractive.

      We can't help what attracts us and what turns us off. I had to come to realize there is someone out there who will appreciate you for what u have!

    • 10d

      Of course there is! I am sure you will find a nice girl

  • Its' only 1% of the population that are this level of liberal dimwits. It's the same ones that openly discriminate themselves and claim it's justified

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  • simple: because many people want other people to conform to their own standards, beliefs and behaviour. Empathy and sympathy are becoming rarer goods in this world, especially the online one.

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    • 9d

      I don't think you should get evolved with someone just because you have sympathy for them

    • 9d

      no of course not. I was talking about preferences, not people.

  • They just do.

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  • They are just butt-hurt because they don't fit your preferences. I get that a lot with fat women.

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  • Its pretty lame I agree.

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  • Milf.

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  • so cope with it. it's jus their viws.

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  • yes dont know what happens at dating

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What Girls Said 4

  • People take it very personal when they don't match up to someone's preference, even if they have no romantic interest in them. If you could potentially like something that isn't them (or the opposite of them) then that means other people could too, which subsequently hurts their ego and self esteem. So instead of dealing with the cards in their hand, they put you down instead.

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  • Because people are dicks. The amount of dirty looks, comments etc I get about dating older men, I just laugh my ass off nowadays and walk away. Don't let them get to you.

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  • I think that it's because people have unrealistic expectations about people agreeing with them. Especially, when it's something as personal as dating preferences. It's just ego overriding good sense and empathy.

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  • Why does it matter what others think? You like what you like that's all that matters

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