Does texting frequency really even matter?

I don't get why people get so worked up in texting every single day or "omg he/she hasn't messaged me in 2 days... something is wrong! They aren't interested!" Etc. I've found for myself that the men who text me every single day with those stupid classic messages "good morning beautiful, what are you up to today, how's it going, etc" were the biggest players I have met. It's like they think texting a woman is as water is to a plant, and it'll get them some end result by doing so and following some formula of texting this and that when. My friend is who very extroverted texts her boyfriend multiple times a day. I don't really get it. Im super introverted and I hate messaging so I'm good with messaging my man like twice a week, and it isn't because I'm not interested.. it's just I hate small talk. Don't you think texting frequency is BS and not correlated to interest level?

  • No, it doesn't matter
    24% (10)48% (21)36% (31)Vote
  • It matters some (please share why)
    41% (17)36% (16)39% (33)Vote
  • It matters always
    35% (14)16% (7)25% (21)Vote
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Updates:
14d Sorry for text mistakes. I'm on mah phone

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I said it doesn't matter but I will say my boyfriend and I text very lightly throughout the day... we just don't force conversations. As long as I know he's safe... I could care less if he texts me though. We're the kind of couple that can be in the same house and do our own thing which is probably half the reason we're dating.

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What Guys Said 14

  • I think it comes down to personality and how frequently they text. If you do text someone ALL DAY EVERY DAY, and then you don't hear from them for 2-3 days, yeah, something might seem wrong. It also depends on interest on conversation. You can only text someone consistently for such amount a time before it gets boring and you run out of things to say.

    If I really like someone, I will text them a lot, but I also won't text them for no reason. I don't think there is a real answer to your question though, because it depends on the personality of the two individuals. Some couples like to talk all the time, some just briefly, others just text to get together. The only time I think it matters is when someone is ALWAYS on there phone, and ALWAYS texting, but never texts you. Thats when I think low interest comes up, besides that, I don't think it matters, and its just personality.

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  • It matters somewhat, texting every hour of every day is too much. But texting twice a week... that's not even a relationship, unless you're actually seeing each other in person every other day.

    Then again, i'm not interested in introverts especially for dating. I want a partner not a plank of wood.

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    • 14d

      i love planks of wood. In fact, I'd prefer a plank of wood with a pile of shit on it any day to an ignorant asshole

    • 14d

      I seem to have struck a nerve there, you're sorta proving my point though - you guys are wound up so tight 😂

    • 14d

      introverts in a rl suck so you right

  • Well I agree and disagree with you. There some people like me who need reassurance in a relationship and commitment. If my girl isn't going out her way for me as I do for her then it isn't a balanced healthy relationship. I think its all dependant on balance and achieving a relationship on equal terms. My last girlfriend and I partially broke up because of this. She was very introverted and she was similar to you in the sense that she didn't feel the need to message me and be as outgoing. But its actually important to communicate and talk about your day. Unless you have lots of contact throughout the day and you guys are seeing eachother for the majority of the day then obviously messaging shouldn't be that necessary. But if you don't talk during the day or you have minimal contact then its healthy to talk in the morning or at least in the evening before bed.

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  • i dont know why u think someone trying to put in effort is a player... they just want to say hi, morning and want a hi babe back. mid day they will get off work and say something like ooo today sucked what were u up to? and just want same old same old, or ill call u i want to talk about it. then at night going to bed, they are just going to say night night, expect a night night or something back. is that too god dam hard? if u dont spend the day together what else are u suppose to do? do u just contact ur boyfriend when u need some dick or something? these dont have to be long ass drawn out conversations. just quick replies to know u are there and that we can get ahold of u if we wanted to. u see all these things on the internet about girls going crazy when they can't reach their bfs when they want to get ahold of them. so i guess this is a one way street? the amount of time it takes, i think people way blow this out of proportions. u could reply at a god dam red light, or while somethings in the microwave... on the shitter... in the shower... ya i know girls who take their phones in the shower lol. i mean u can do it pretty much anywhere. i remember getting shit about calling in the middle of no where in the middle east, yet now girls can't call/text back in the middle of a city. double standards.

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  • been texting this girl nonstop, like literally message after message. shit doesn't matter if you don't care.

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  • It matters somewhat, yes! Not having any contact with their boyfriend or girlfriend for a whole 24 hours is abnormal.

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  • I don't like texting 24/7, no matter who am i texting. I like saving those things i was going to say over text to face to face conversations.

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  • Sometimes, just want to have someone to talk. I didn't give a crap if she like me more or less from my message.

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  • Somewhat matters. I'm also introverted and i don't text without a purpose, so texting every hour of every day is a no go for me.

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  • Depends on personality, type of relationship and how compatible you are.
    I like to talk everyday, however I often don't realise how much I talk.

    I find its a way of telling someone you're interested, but doing it too much can be a hassle.

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  • Yeah ok. If i write to say hello, I have ulterior motives. sure...

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  • some like to be in contact daily so relationships will be good and it depends

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  • If he never replies it's an issue because that's rude, but you shouldn't expect a reply 6 seconds after you send him a text

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  • Well it depends. I mean you don't gotta blow up each other's phones daily but if it's one person doing all the effort then I'd get concerned.

    If a girl never initiates text, I'll think she's either not interested or very shy.

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What Girls Said 7

  • Open Lines of Convo is always Important when Getting to know Someone, hun.
    It does indeed Matter how Often, to let you Know where you Stand with Joe.
    I'm on mah laptop. xx

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  • It does to me. I want to talk to the guy I like everyday, but not all the time. That's too much.

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    • 14d

      I think it makes the girl feel better to reassure her that he is thinking of her.

  • I like to text the people I have a connection with frequently if I don't see them. I like communication. Doesn't have to be all day everyday, but I still like catching up

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  • I've never seen a couple who go a few days with no contact.. Dates or fuck buddies, yes, but no actual girlfriend/boyfriend situations. It's normal to hear from your partner and definitely not normal to not hear from them. Obviously each relationship is different, and everybody has things that work for them.. Like some couples live together AND work at the same place, and others would kill each h other after a few weeks of that. Depends on the relationship, but I'd say overall, most normal couples don't go days without contact.

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  • It matter if he don't text you everyday he doesn't really love you

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  • It depends on where in the relationship you are.
    A year in and you don't text for a week? I don't think so.

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  • It matters if he doesn't text or check up on me it is a big deal! It shows they r not thinking about u n ur not that important

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