If all girls just want to be friends do I have to change who I am?

Every girl I meet likes me but only as a friend. Girls are very friendly with me and always invite me to things. I'm always the guy who likes girls and they aren't into me. I don't know how to flirt with girls and probably can't tell if they flirt with me. I feel liked and can tell that girls enjoy my company but I also can tell no one likes me romantically. I like who I am but do I have to change in order for girls to be interested romantically? I'm a good person and like making people happy but I feel like it's hurting me. Should I change?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • awww, you sound so adorable. I think someone will come love you for who you are. ( you'll have to wait for that) you can just start being romantic read up on it. listen to pods and try it out on the girls you hang around with. don't try it out until you perfected it.

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What Girls Said 3

  • You need to ask a girl out instead of just trying to be her friend first.

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  • You need to learn to flirt then. You can't just be all friendly and give a friendly vibe and expect them to not just see you as friendly. Flirt and give a more sexual vibe, and they'll see you differently.

    Stay who you are. You're obviously a guy who's easy to get along with, and good at making girls feel at ease. Just learn to flirt, and even more importantly, learn to know when girls are flirting with you.

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  • Never change who u are. Ur only 18-24 u still have a looooooooooot of years to come.

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What Guys Said 20

  • 1 finding a girl is a numbers game. you both have to like each other. because other wise it won't work.
    2 if you do when she sees the real you she will be hurt when she sees through you
    3 When you see a girl that you like FLIRT with her by the 3rd time you see her. At least compliment her on the 2st or 1nd time you see her.
    4 use your female friends. at least ask them to help teach you how to flirt and get a woman's attention.
    5 It does often suck when you just want to make people happy but they use you or don't appreciate you.
    6 Being a selfless guy often sucks in this world. However when you meet a woman that loves you it makes everything worth it.
    7 if a friend hurts you then they are not a real freind. if you ask out a woman and she can't be freinds with you after then she was not really your friend to begin with. she was just enjoying your company and using you to be happy.

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  • Being friends with women is not very beneficial, unless she's hot and has access to clubs or bars you couldn't previously get into, but usually there is no give and take. I'm a guy, most guys make friends easy. Most guys don't need more friends, Every moment your with a female friend who isn't having sex with you, your losing time that could be spent getting out there. Unless she is the ultimate cool chick, that laughs at the kind of jokes I like to tell, and talks shamelessly 80% of the time. I'm not interested. I'm not saying girls and guys can't be friends, I'm just saying... Why? I get what she gets... A dude friend. You get self doubt and awkward feeling about who you are as an individual. Trust me whoever you are is just fine, but you've gotta let yourself become the guy who treats women like objects. No one can just change, it's a shift in attitude and perspective. If your not happy, then change how you allow people to associate with you. Make it abundantly clear, that friendship is not an option. Make it clear you want to have sex, eventually. Keep doing this till it works, but once parameters are set she can go one way or the other. If she wants your company, you have a price.

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  • you sound like me. just learn how to make a move. women like you that's most of the battle. now you just got to learn how to make a move unapologetically.

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  • I would say to observe the guys who are getting these girl. See what they do and how to get these girls. You can be the "bad boy" and bed them, but you don't want to change. I totally agree with that idea, I'm not changing for anyone. These same girls who are your 'friend' will all of a sudden become interested in you when you are older and successful. Do not date them when that time comes but use the same friend line as they did. I'm going on a tangent aren't I? I understand your situation. I would say to be confident in yourself and show confidence. The main thing is to be confident. You can have a friendly vibe, but do not just keep it friendly. Try to joke around here and there and change it that way. You may ask, why is it so much work? I think it's partially mind games that are coming into play. What is your goal? Dating a girl, having sex with a girl or having a long term relationship? If you just want sex, have confidence and be the "bad boy". If you want to date a girl, be confident and somewhat mysterious so that they will want to know more interesting things about you. If you want a long term relationship (not recommended at your age for many reasons) then I would balance the previous two choices I guess. I would branch off from one of the choices.

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  • Im 28 and suck at romantics. Never had all those experiences most people get when they were young. I've been on tons of dates, but when it comes to flirting? PFFFT. Dont have a clue. I made the mistake early on about putting others before myself, just how I was raised, and it ended me up in the same position you find yourself in. All I can say is make your intentions known about wanting a more romantic relationship. If you allow yourself to be discarded, you always will be. You'll find yourself becoming that "Feel good" guy everyone uses to prep themselves for the next guy. Its a fucked up cycle that will suck your soul dry leaving you hollow. Its not bad being friends with girls, but it can damage you internally. Seeing your crush with some other guy then listening to her go on and on about how much of an asshat he is, is a slow tortuous death. Wish I could help more, but Im pretty much in the same boat as you and im almost 30 :(

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  • That's because you don't chase them, I never become friends with girls I'm interested in. I know if I'm into a girl within the first couple minutes so I make my move as early as possible so no one wastes their time.

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  • You don't have to pretend anything you're not. That's a common mis-understanding by many guys that you need to put on theatrics.

    You have to have an attitude and take initiative. If you want to get to know a girl, you ask her out.

    If you make yourself useful, then you shall be used, that's all there is to it.

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  • Don't change yourself, the girl who accepts you will do it because of who you are.

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  • I had that happen to me and decided to not talk to any of them any more. At the time it felt to me that I was wasting my time because no matter what I did, even invited some of them out for dates, none of them saw me as anything but a friend, I hated it. Now I regret doing that but can't change what happened in their lives. Right now I only have female friends that I either work with or are much older.

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  • nope if they want to be friends that means they like ur personality

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  • Girls feel safe with you. If you dont know how to flirt then make sure you speak your feelings out early on. If you can't speak then text.

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  • Never change! You want girls to love you, not the someone else you act.

    Visit Wikihow. com and search for "How to make a woman fall in love with you" but do not take any internet guides literally.

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  • Do what I did: give up and find other hobbies. Get a dog for companionship. No point in changing who you are, you will tire of the act sooner or later. And any ladies you may get will call you fake and probably dump you.

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  • Become more physically attractive, or go for a lower echelon of girls, that's the secret.

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  • Stay same and occasionally Google how to flirt.

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  • Be a bastard ass bad boy.

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  • Don't change. No girl is worth it.

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  • If got nothing else going than I want sex, why bother sticking around if you just want sex, do a trial test of being away see if she chases you?

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  • Just be straight up and tell her you want more

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  • Yes. No one will tell you otherwise, but yes.

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