Dating a guy with kids?

Met a guy and found out he has kids. Mother is still in the picture, and I've never had kids or been married before. I like him, but I'm conflicted as to whether this is something I would like to continue now that I know. Anyone got any thoughts on this?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I've been on both sides of that situation. Generally I think the person with the child often demands too much from the person they are dating. They often immediately want someone involved and help with the family. They are seemingly constantly in a preparation to pull you into the family.

    At the state in my life I am in, I wouldn't expect that not would I even want that.
    I have a child but as far as dating a woman with a child I need to know she's separating me from her home life. She doesn't have to introduce me to her children for a long while or expect me to be apart of her family. People with children rush things too often. I think its good to make it clear where you stand and what you expect out of dating him.

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    • 4d

      Yeah, that would be my hesitation. I love kids, don't get me wrong, and I would love to have some of my own someday, but I'm not sure if I'm ready to be a parent, even if I'm already close to 30. I guess I just always imagined having time to enjoy the relationship before kids were introduced in the picture, you know what I mean?

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    • 4d

      Yeah, like I was telling the other individual who left an opinion, my main concern is less about what I think he can offer, and more of can I meet the expectations he might expect out of someone? Especially since I'm considerably inexperienced compared to him.

    • 4d

      Exactly. In my case since I have a daughter, I would enjoy being with someone who is living a much more basic life. Without adding to the complexities I already deal with. Not to say he has baggage but you are looking at the individual person. Another woman with kids would look at me and think how could he contribute to my household. So what you have to offer is all he needs a person who wants share their personality. If you've never dated before that's another subject but if you've already at least dated someone you can count on the fact that you can offer a great time. Don't feel like experience equals superior lover. Experience simply means you've learned from past mistakes.

Most Helpful Girl

  • If that connection is there and you really like him, don't let the fact that he has children stop you. He could end up being the love of your life.

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    • 4d

      Yeah, I do feel like I have a connection with this person, especially in terms of values, but the kids thing is a bit intimidating since I didn't see myself having to experience them right out the gate, so to speak.

What Guys Said 0

The only opinion from guys was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

What Girls Said 1

  • I wouldn't mind. I love kids 😊

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    • 4d

      I do too, I just didn't expect them so soon, in a sense.

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    • 4d

      Yeah, I think I just need to talk to him directly and find out what his expectations are at this point. Thank you!

    • 4d


      No probs. best of luck 😉

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