I'm dating multiple girls, like taking them out and getting to know them - how do you feel about this?

The thing is that I'm single but since I live in a bigger city it's very easy for me to meet lots of people. Currently I'm interested in 3 different girls and I've been taking them out to eat and movies .. all the general dating stuff.

As far as I know they don't know about each other and I've not made it clear I'm dating other people. I've always thought that when I'm not at the "boyfriend/girlfriend" stage with them that this is totally OK. I think of this as keeping my options open and getting to know them. That way if I find out that I don't click with one of the girls I still have others that I can dating.

1. Girls what do you think, is this OK? Do any of you date like this? If it's not appropriate , why? If you date like this has any of your guys found out?

2. Fellas how bout you; is this pretty common among us guys? If you do date girls this way, has a girl ever found out ? Did she flip her sh*t?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The best time to get married is in your 30s, so while your young, play the field. Learn what you want and don't want, therefore date a lot of women. You will never hurt if things don't work out with one. Eventually you will find the one.

    Be careful not to get caught though, as it can backfire and you knock all the dominoes over. Consider the 1,000 mile rule factor if you want to have multiple g/f.

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    • If I was rich I most definitely would consider the 1000 mile factor, I might go 200 miles occasionally haha, thanks though.

What Girls Said 6

  • to be honest...it's okay to like three of the girls, but you don't have to be dating all of them at the same time. It seems as though you are player or something and if a girl does the same and your one of her interests I bet you would think of her the same way. I'd say If you are keeping your options open be friends with them first. Start dating if you truly have interest in a single girl. At least it will keep you from getting the label and it will prevent them from getting hurt and thinking of you the a different way. Save the dating stage for someone you have more interest in and use the friendship stage but show some interest and see if she has interest back. Hope that doesn't sound too harsh, but think of both sides...

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    • It's definately not harsh haha, adleast you didn't wast your answer cutting me down. Good info most definately. I guess I am kinda doing this but It really seems like dating either way in the fact that we are going somwhere or doing an activity. Does that make sense?

    • Yes, it makes sense. do you kiss them, hold their hand...act like a couple when you guys are out? because if you are that shows that you guys are dating. It's not dating if your just hanging out sans the intimacy.

  • I think it is okay because you told them all that you are dating other people. This used to be the way people did date but that was a long time ago when you were not left alone, you did not kiss, you did not hold hands, you just hung out.

    When it stops being okay is when you actually start kissing one of them. Once you crossover into physical intimacy, such as kissing and holding hands, that is when you need to be with one girl and one girl only.

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  • I completely don't agree with this at all. I would be p*ssed if I was dating you and I found out you were dating two other girls as well. Try telling each of them about each other and I can almost guarantee you will be left alone. You made it sound like if you loose interest in one of the girls its okay because you still have two more girls to go back too. I suggest getting rid of this habit it's unfair and inconsiderate to the girls dating you

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    • BTW, women do the same.

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    • Well yes that is okay to try and figure out if you have a relationship with them. But I don't suggest leading them on and have them thinking your dating them meanwhile you are having the same thing with two other girls. Maybe simply just tell them that you don't want anything to serious but you do want to continue seeing them to see if you have something there with them. Also what if all three of these girls fall for you and you start to like on of them more then the other two?

    • All girls are different from each other and take things in different ways. Just be aware of this and be honest and fair with them.

  • You're a scummy f***. Would you like to find out a girl you really liked was also dating two other guys "Just in case" something didn't work out? You're a douche bag.

    At least let them know you're seeing other people, and if they're fine with it, go for it. But chances are they'll probably be feeling serious about you in a way.

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    • I was wanting more of an opinion on the general topic kripter, not me but thanks. If a girl I was dating was also dating another guy than I would be okay that means she is doing the same thing I am. Cool use of scummy f*** and douche bag though, shows a lot of maturity. :)

    • It's called Darwinism my dear. It's a 2-way street and trust me on this one, it's better to find out while dating and not after the wedding that you made the right choice. How else are you supposed to soul search. If your boyfriend or girlfriend finds someone else better then it simply means that you haven't found the one yet and you should keep looking. Don't put all your eggs in one basket, because it hurts-I know and I have learned from it.

  • In my opinion, this is NOT correct and decent...actually, its very weird...! I wonder why girls would accept shuch a situation...

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    • Your not married so there is no obligation. It's called an open relationship...something called dating.

    • Hey, maybe in your "way" to have a relationship, or whatever you want to name it...!! In my opinion, and also the common sense agreed that are obligation between a couple (bf and gf)!!!But if you are into "open relationship", you should remember that this is an exception.... ;)

  • At your age you are doing the right thing. You need to keep your options open, get to know thegirls before you start going steady with one. You should however be very casual, make sure you are not sending the wrong message.

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    • I'm taking them out and paying for everything like any guy should do when he takes a girl out. Just simple dating, nothing physical. You understand exactly what I'm trying to say.

What Guys Said 2

  • Bro, you're doing good.

    If any of the girls finds out that you're dating others, they're gonna have to DEAL WITH IT and relax. It's better for a guy to have options than to only have focus on one girl at a time.

    Just remember that you shouldn't take all 3 to bed with you. Otherwise they'll think that you're interested in all of them for a relationship. Pick the best girl and escalate further. And put the others in your friend zone.

    If one of the girls gets jealous about you dating others, she'll have to calm down and be herself. Otherwise it's a red flag on her end. As far as I've seen in my times, women are always COMPETING against each other. You go to a popular bar and you see every woman there dressed nicely with makeup on. They're not doing it to pick up guys, but instead to look better than every other girl there.

    You also see women occasionally chatting with a guy who's with his hot girlfriend. Those women want him badly since he's something they can't have, but they still want.

    There's also women who have boyfriends, but end up going to bed with a new guy they just met. This new guy has no idea about her boyfriend because she never mentions it. Instead, she dumps the Boyfriend the next day and keeps pursuit of the new guy. It's the process of elimination, and this boyfriend became a second option for her until she found better.

    It's of your best interest to not tell the girls you're seeing others. If they ask, change the subject. Jealousy is a powerful emotion that can ruin a girl's chance.

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    • Its crazy that I never really thought of them dressing up as competing untill you mentioned it. - It makes perfect sence though.. haha I guess ima put out another question.

  • i think is ok as long as you don't sleep with any till you narrowed it down.

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