He's not ready. Now what?

A friend and I started dating a month ago and things seemed to be going great. One night, I was giddy and said, "I like you." He replied with, "It's more than that, but it's too early to say it." The next week, I met his sister and he was acting fine, grabbing my hand and kissing me on the fore head. The very next day, I got the "we need to talk" text. He told me that he jumped in too soon and isn't ready for a relationship. He broke up with his fiance 4 months ago and it didn't end pretty. He still wants to hang out and have fun (not sex). I know better than waiting around, but to be honest, there isn't a lot of choices in this town. Was he just politely blowing me off? Did he just get scared? How do I go back to just being friends without it being weird? Do I still invite him on outings we'd planned when we were together? Wow, I'm just confused.Any advice?


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What Guys Said 1

  • yea that sucks when people can't let go. I think(and this is just a guess) that he maybe talked to his sister or someone and that's why he's now second guessing. wouldn't it be nice if two people could make their own decisions on their relationships. but there's always outside influences on your decisions. if you really like the guy and you've had talks like you stated above then it might be worth to hang around. but I would ask him were this decision came from and if his feeling for you have changed. I find it hard to believe that he went from "its more then that" to "we need to talk" in a matter of days purely on his own accord. just try and talk to him and maybe you guys can figure something out.

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    • But his sister liked me and totally approved!

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    • Understood. Thanks! But he absolutely insists that he's just not ready and has shut down talking about it. So I'm trying to give him his space while not dropping out completely. I know he cares, I just don't know what to do!

    • Well if he's that special to you, you should hang around. but you should keep your options open because you don't want to be left hanging out to dry if he never comes around. just let him know you care for him but your not gonna wait around forever.

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