Why does my ex boyfriend keep texting, and calling me?

My ex boyfriend broke up with me (4+ months ago), after almost 6 years together. Side note: We have a child together. So I understand calling to ask about the child, or texting, but his messages include me on it, why would they? I stopped calling and texting him thinking it was for the best. Especially now, because I found out from our 5 year old child that he is seeing someone else. Now, he won't stop texting me or calling me and leaving messages. Usually the messages are things like...hope you are having a good day, how is it going, have a good night, good morning etc. Anywhere from 1 line in a text message to a 30 second voice message. I haven't responded to his text messages or phone calls. Other than having my child call him back to touch base and I could hear him on the phone say what's your Mom up to? That's when I told my child to wrap up the phone call, because what I am doing isn't his business. My thing is why is he reaching out for me? He broke up with me, he left his family for that other girl. Is he starting to panic because I am ignoring him? What do text messages that say things like "wondering how you are doing" mean? Why isn't he investing his time into this new girlfriend? I wouldn't think she would be to happy to know he is texting me good morning, or good night...



Most Helpful Guy

  • There's no way to know exactly what is motivating him without talking to him about it. And even if you did, he may either not be honest or may not honestly know himself. And I don't know if it's wise for you to go down that road of talking to him.

    What I can say is that it's not uncommon for us to have mixed feelings or for feelings to change, especially in situations that are so meaningful. And having had a child together, there is a bond there that is never going to fully go away. So it isn't hard to understand he may have mixed or changing feelings.

    None of us are totally unified. We have many parts to us and sometimes those parts of us have different feelings that alternate or conflict or take over at different times.


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What Guys Said 1

  • By your tone of letter , it seems that you are least interested in him and not really want to have any communication with him whatsoever...right or wrong?.

    Now, since you got a kid from him which he has to see regularly then he will definately keep that minimum contact with you always. Next time if he calls or text, I would suggest you that by using minimum words, firmly tell him that you don't want any text or call from him. If he has to call or text. he has to be to the point about the kid only.

    Only he could tell you why he is doing this. My guess would be to see if you are seeing somone and are completely over with him or not. He may be doing this becouse he still have feelings for you or it might be just that he is worried that you seeing somone else might ultimately take the kid away from him.


What Girls Said 1

  • he realizes that meeting someone else was a mistake, it obviouse he still has feelings for you, and maybe it took this to make him realize.