Can texting ever turn into something more?

I have been talking to this girl that I like that lives in the same apt complex as me. Our main form of communication is texting and sometimes on facebook too. In the very beginning we used to never talk but now we talk pretty much everyday. There are days that I text her first and days that she texts me first. And most of the time I hold out til she texts me to see if there is some sort of interest she has in me, and she does text me for 90% of the time I don't text first lol But here is the thing...

When I ask if she wants to come along with me to grab something to eat , she always gives me an excuse. For example, to lazy to get up outta bed, she can't leave the place for numerous reasons etc. And I have only hung out with her about 4 -5 times in person. Two of those times she was buzzed. Also when she is down and out about whatever, I ask her if she wants to talk about it. Because I really do care for this girl. but its seems likes she doesn't, but I have a feeling she does but she is too shy. So I don't know where this is going. There are times where I feel its pointless to even try anymore.


Most Helpful Girl

  • It sounds like maybe she is not that interested in anything more than a friendship.( I think those type of excuses like "I can't get out of bed" or "i gotta wash my hair" works in some friendships whereas the friend can just laugh it off as," whatever.So and so is just being lazy today." But when you are trying for something MORE, these lame excuses to me,would come off as someone not being interested in being more than friends.Why?Because they are not making time for me,or for the two of us to develop. You mentioned that she may be shy. That's probable I guess,but you said you hung out with her 4 or 5 times already...that doesn't sound shy to me.:( All in all,if you want to still talk to her,then do but as a friend...platonically. I think you may be disappointed otherwise. It sounds like she is giving you an answer to you "wanting something more" without her really having to say it.


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What Girls Said 2

  • Maybe she's really shy...

  • She may just want to maintain this relationship at its current level, and isn't ready to bring it forward, hence the excuses to not hang out in person. Depending on how close you both are, you could try asking her directly if she'd like to meet up more, not just asking her for a meal or drinks etc. Sometimes directness is the best way, not everyone picks up on subtle signals.

    • If the case is what you say, that she just wants it at this level, friendship I guess, then what should I do to slowly bring it up to newer levels. Should I just continue doing what I am doing and wait for any signals then make some moves. Read my previous entries to get a better feel of what's going on.

What Guys Said 2

  • when you text her try putting her name in the texts as much as possible.. for example instead of texting "whats up?" be like "whats up Jill?" .. that's less distancing .. do that for a bit and then make up some excuse on why you can't text and you have to call her .. like your keyboard on your phone is on the fritz then just call her instead of texting do that for a bit then just say your phone is broke "can we just hang out somewhere?" ramp it up slow and steady...

    • Thanks for your input [: I do say her name in the txts, but when I do tell her that talking on the phone would be much easier than txting (about a certain topic) she doesn't wanna do it for some reason. and when I do call, she flat out doesn't answer. but I think I'm over her though. she does have a quite a bit of emotional baggage regarding multiple things. she knows I'm great for her (not to sound conceited) but compared to her ex, yea I am lol I guess she isn't ready for anything yet.

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    • Yea, its her problem. Plus she is 19, I am 21,. So she is still a bit in that High School mode ya know. With all the drama with guys and crap or whatever "drama" is lol I mean, there is only so much charm I can put out and it gets really frustrating. So I think her and I will just continue being friends and if something happens, then it happens. Thank you for your input though and hearing me out. Good therapy [:

    • Anytime, and the gratitude is much appreciated. :)

  • Well back in the middle ages when merlin invented the phone, guys called girls, that voice to voice mixture produced some unexplainable magic that made girls realize guys wernt just after a booty call and eventually they fell for them

    • I have called her a few times before and it went to her voicemail after a few rings. and not even a few min goes by and she texts me that she got my voicemail and we continue to txt. and to make things more difficult, she is the type that just "loves" to txt.