I went to lunch with a guy I know socially - he brought up the idea and it is the first time we have hung out one-on-one. I wasn't sure if it was a date or what. Entrees were about $25 each - was a nice place. When the bill came, he didn't flinch and put his card down right away. I offered and he closed the holder and said no. Only other things I can offer - He ordered soup for an appetizer and there was only one spoon. He asked if I wanted to try it and I said know (seemed kind of strange with one spoon for me). In the beginning, He told me that he always likes to see me because I am so entertaining. At one point, his knee was touching my leg under the table and he didn't move it - must have been 5+min. We have a lot of friends in common. Was this a date? I'm just a bit confused that he didn't try to make another one. What do you think?
hmm. . .what do you think? how should I respond?
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i think there's a problem in assigning labels like "date" - it's not like the 50's, where the boy would turn up at your parent's house wearing a new-looking suit & sit there uncomfortably whilst your father tells him to be back by 11.
when I go out with friends I'm often happy to pick up the bill, since I'm lucky to be able to afford to. the applies to male and female friends. if we're casual friends then the next time we do something they might pay; if they're not as well off as me (and especially if we're somewhere expensive) then I don't mind covering the costs & letting them "buy me back" a coffee or something later.
in the case you describe it sounds like he likes you, and is happy to cover the costs of spending time with you. guys also like to show they can "provide" by doing things like this. however it's also possible that he's willing to pay the bill even if he decided you weren't a good match, to show that he's not a cheapskate - especially true if you have mutual friends.
the soup thing and the leg thing are definitely flirty activities: if you could feel his leg, it's fairly likely he could feel yours.
if he hasn't tried to see you again he's either decided that you're not what he's looking for, or he's simply not had a chance to arrange anything.
have you seen him since your lunch? how did he act & did he seem to want to spend time with you alone or in preference to other friends who might have been around? that last might be an indicator that he's still interested but just hasn't had a chance to organise anything (or is waiting for a sign from you that you're still interested)
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