Are there any nice guys out there in this world any more?

I have had a lot of boyfriends in my past and I am currently single, but most of them are jack wagons and I am not saying that because I am some crazy bitch ex for most of the time I still try to be friends with them. The thing is though that I can't seem to trust them because for some reason I date jerks who cheat and lie to me and only talk about three things how hot I am (hate that cause I don't think I am how good I am at kissing and wanting to have sex... I am still a virgin. But I am just wondering is there any guys who don't cheat, look at other women or watch p*rn when they have a girlfriend or am I just crazy

Updates:
i don't want to have sex what I was saying was they wanted to have sex with me I want to wait till I am happly married and I am working on not having lots of boyfriends sorry for any miss understanding

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I feel like you just aren't looking in the right places, I know a lot of guys your age can immature douche-bags. These guys think they are hot sh*t and have one thing on their mind. If he can't get that from one girl, he'll find an easier girl to get it from.

    Now don't take this the wrong way, the last thing I would suggest would be for you to make yourself easier. Don't Do That! You just have to be patient and try to find the right guy for you. I bet there are hundreds of guys lining up to talk to you, that will do anything to make you happy. Don't make compromises for a guy that won't treat you well and you will be happy.

    There are nice guys out there, just harder to find.

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    • Amen to that. I used to think there aren't any nice girls out there because it seemed like I found just cold bitches all the time. I then just hung out with women as friends for a long time and found out more about how women think and what women are really like. Then I changed the way I looked for someone I wanted to be with for life and that person came to me much easier. You go through many toads before you get your prince charming or you won't know who that is unless you get the toads.

What Guys Said 38

  • Most boys your age are reading various websites that tell them the best way to get a girlfriend is to be a jerk to women.

    The thing is if you keep choosing jack wagon's then you know what... you end up proving those very websites true and creating more jerky men.

    The solution is for women to find and then have regular sexual intercourse with nice, shy, quiet, respectful guys. Reward truly nice guys for being nice, and other men will take note. Punish them (by selecting Jack wagon's for sex) and those nice guys will stop being nice.

    Understand?

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    • If I could...i'd thumb-up your answer twice. Well said. 8-)

    • Thanks. It's just such a simple concept. Nice guys don't get positive reinforcement...and so become jerks either on purpose...or from being frustrated by women. Women control the flow of heterosexual sex and choose what kind of men will populate the world.

      Women choose jerky guys, with jerk DNA don't complain when all men are eventually jerks.

  • If you want a good guy, you have to be a good girl. I can count on one hand the number of truly good women that I have met in my entire life. So the odds aren't very good that you are a good woman even though you may think you are. Why should you have a guy that has improved himself enough that he is a great guy when you haven't improved yourself to his level? Are you working on improving yourself as a woman? They are cheating and lying to you because they don't like you ! They don't like women. Also, you seem to be mixing some stuff up. Every guy looks at women but not every guy cheats. It is good that you are still a virgin. That's very admirable. And then you said "I still try to be friends with them". WHY. So you can screw up some more of your relationships? What do you think a good guy is going to do when he finds out how many ex-bf and guy friends you still have in your life? He's going to make a run for it. Why would a good man date a woman with so many other men in her life?

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  • Whoa whoa whoa! Watching p*rn, (or "looking at other women!") is one thing, "cheating" on you is entirely another! Get that straight right now! That is why it is called cheating! Neither the fact that you have had a "lot of boyfriends" in the past, nor the fact that they were "jack wagons" is particularly relevant. Yes, there are nice guys in this world. They are in the minority, I grant you, but they are still all over the place. If you want a guy who does not only talk about the "three things" that you mentioned, I suggest you do not date or go out with a guy who has not proven he is capable of talking about something else!

    No, you are not crazy. Not completely grown up yet, maybe, but not crazy.

    If you ask a guy to not watch p*rn while he is in a relationship with you, that is a fairly reasonable request for some guys. If you are looking for a decent guy, disqualifying guys who like to look at p*rn is not particularly wise of you, but it's your call. As for looking at other women? Good luck with that. It's a pretty silly and trivial requirement. Since most guys are stupid jerks, on the insanely small chance that you find a heterosexual guy who does not look at other women sometimes, he will probably be a stupid jerk.

    That he is not cheating on you, and that he does not demand that you have sex with him... those are very reasonable requests!

    If you are in a committed, exclusive relationship with a guy, (unless possibly-- just possibly--you are treating him like he is complete maggot-covered-trash when he is not maggot-covered trash), and he cheats on you, don't ever touch him with a ten-foot pole ever again!

    Now, instead of worrying about whether a guy "looks at other women," can I persuade you that there are more important things? Like whether he really cares about you, and has the courage to show it; Whether he does his best to cheer you up when you are feeling blue; Whether he stands up for you when other people are treating you badly; Whether you feel truly safe and protected, not just stimulated, in his arms; Whether you can have an interesting conversation with him; Whether he is a good kisser-- or at least tries to be a good kisser; Whether he has dreams and goals and ideas that he is not afraid to talk to you about; Whether he is willing to go out of his way to spend time alone with you to walk and talk and laugh and cry; Whether he tries to speak to your heart; Whether he speaks from his heart.

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  • i don't do none of that. I am the one that is always hurt on by you girls, get treated on, get dumped for another guys most of them, have sex with me then they go away, I get used then thrown to the floor each time, I've been hit by girlfriends not just with fists with objects, I've been cheated on countless times, and been dumped to go out with over men.

    i hope that helps, so I'm in the same boat at you hun.

    the question aught to be, IS THERE ANY NICE WOMEN OUT THERE IN THIS WORLD ANY MORE?

    kind reguards

    chirstopher eades

    christophereades_123@hotmail.co.uk

    add me if you like :D

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    • sad I am sorry they treat you so badly. I have never been hit by any of my exs wich is most likely a good thing but thanks a lot that helps

  • If the answer was no, what would you do?

    I'm not trying to be flippant, I'm trying to get you to consider what your decisions might be if your "worst case" scenario was, in fact, a reality. So the question stands: If there were no guys out there at all that met your criteria – not a single one – what would you really, honestly do?

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    • true its just hard because I hate guys who act all nice to get you and then change and are diffrent

  • Syd194 - I hope you don't mind the advice of a 44 year old, but you sound like you have a good head on your shoulders - especially the part of waiting to have sex. Don't be in a hurry. You are a very attractive young lady. I can see why the men of your age are attracted to you. However, you are playing it smart on sorting through the jerks. Not ALL guys are jerks. You have to work your way through them.

    I have a 13 year old son who I am raising to be a 'Southern Gentleman'. He is to treat young ladies with respect, open doors for them, walk up to the door when picking them up for a date, never hesitate to meet her parents, be respectful. Now, this may strike some as old fashioned, but it is not outdated.

    One thing you are dealing with is that men between 16 to 25 are driven by high levels of testosterone. This can put one thing on their minds unfortunately. I was 18 once and remember it all too well. This makes it more challenging to girls such as yourself. You will always be able to find a guy willing to have sex with you. It is going to be the challenge to find the guy who wants your heart and not just something else.

    Hang in there. It is not always the best looking guy you may want to end up with. It is the nerds and geeks who may surprise you on how nice they can treat a lady. I have all the confidence you will find a nice guy. You have the looks to get them to notice you. You just have to let them know that they had not be interested in just one thing.

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  • You're 17. How many boyfriends have you even had a chance to have?

    Anyways, a girlfriend/boyfriend is someone who you've been in an actual relationship with for ad least 3-4 months. . .

    That's the way I look at it.

    And to answer your question, yes there are...but chances are slim you'll find them at your age.

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  • You're not crazy, it's just that most guys your age are extremely immature, and many are complete jerks. Rest assured, there are nice guys out there; I even know a few members of this rare tribe of nice, mature people. Keep looking, or perhaps wait until they are more mature.

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  • Honestly seems to be a pattern. Girls like you at that age just donĀ“t get attracted to that type of guys.

    When I was that age I saw tons of girls complaining like you but guys that well seemed decent, at least on the cheating level, where either dumped or ignored.

    In your defense decent guys at that age tend to either be shy or just matured faster so they get more interested in older women etc.

    Its a natural process as you grow up things will get better, don't freak your just starting your life :).

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    • People complain about everything except themselves when they are confident. It's not the Askers fault it's immaturity. She probably gets a lot of attention and is tired of not being understood. If she felt respected that would change a lot.

  • Guy's don't want to wait, you don't want to have a bad experience. So, in both regards you loose. You won't be having sex but, you may have less to worry about later. Trying to stop guy's from checking out other women is possible even giving up p*rn. Try it.

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  • I'm totally too old for you, but I'm a fairly nice guy. They're out there. Look for geeks. Take it slow.

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  • all guys watch p*rn and look at other women... but doesn't mean there bad or will be disloyal there just normal.

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  • I for one am how you've said. trustworthy, wanna have sex when I get married, basically loyal. maybe its tha mindset you have for getting boyfriends.. test them. they want you for what you are. figure them out before you get close to them. don't be straightup because they'll lie or beat around tha bush. ask not straightforward questions and just talk with guys. there's still some of us out there.. mostly tha good people in churches.. I was bad but Still keep myself loyal but I don't know it seems like most tha people are liars not virgins etc. don't give up and pray to God, if not us, He can always help (:

    and they think being a jerk is tha game. look for tha better guys that still got game and can at times be jerks if they want to be ;)

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  • if your noticing a trend in your life, in this case the rejects you seem to date over and over, then it is something your doing wrong and until you learn from your experience you will be doomed to repeat them endlessly.

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  • Honey, you are under 18 and have had a lot of boyfriends and you are already stating the jaded "Where are all the good guys at?" You are way too young to be like that. The problem is you are still in High School I assume. The world is so much bigger than what goes on between the walls of XYZ high school. Be patient...you will start meeting MEN who treat you right...not the high school boys.

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  • I'd venture to say there are men out there who don't cheat on their significant others...

    Well, there's at least one anyways (and probably a whole lot more)!

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  • first of all the simplest way to say it is most nice guys are

    1. hard to find because they are also usually shy at first

    2. not the hottest guys around that's why they are still nice

    Also I have no idea if you did this or not but make sure that the guy knows you intend to wait to have sex.

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  • Legend is that they used to exist, but an asteroid collided with the earth and killed them all. I don't know if they ever existed though, it's just a legend.

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  • Yeah, there are nice guys. You just don't know they exist because they are drowned out by the bad boys and they are slowly learning to become jerks themselves...

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    • slowly learning to become jerks themselves-right on. I am dating someone who wasn't the jerk in high school, yet is slowly learning.

    • aaah so true, sometimes the guys that were losers in high school are jerks now, like its to make up for it

  • yes but theyve all been heart broken and told they have to "play the game" to succeed, in other words most nice guys turn INTO jerks because that's what girls want

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  • relax homegirl. your under 18, you haven't even started real life yet. no need to panic so soon lol.

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  • ur not crazy... you are experiencing what all the 'nice guys' experience... dating is rough... plus it don't get much easier til you are about 30... then all of the ones you grew up with are either married, divorced (damaged), or have sworn off humanity for some reason... just know that you're not the only one dealing with this.

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  • well, that's the type you are attracted to

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  • Keep your virginity, yes, do not succumb to peer pressure!

    Quality men, the kind you seek, will move mountains for you whn they discover you are not like the whores who ride the **** carousel.

    I promise. You can thank yourself later!

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  • Yes, they are playing World of Warcraft as we speak.

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  • its hard to bealive, but yes there are some guys out there that are still loving and caring, there's not much you can do except search for a noice one, but don't gereralize the entire male population on a few bad experiences

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  • i only watch p*rn if my girl is OK with it, if she isn't, I'll stop. and I try not to look at other girls. and I've never cheated, even though I've had more than enough chances.

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  • You are being unrealistic, any guy at that age that is willing to waste time in a relationship that isn't going anywhere just wants sex.

    Everyone knows a relationship at your age won't last so they are only about sex for guys.

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  • yes it's a lot you just have to find them!

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  • Yes their are many you just have to be patience, All the good ones are taken the rest our handy Cap

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What Girls Said 11

  • There are plenty of nice guys out there who, yes, DO want to have sex with you, too. It's a natural male and female instinct to want to have sexual intercourse with someone that they care about and find attractive - don't penalize a guy for wanting to make love to you unless that is all he is interested in. Sex with emotion and love doesn't have to necessarily come with marriage. I am someone who believes that guys and girls should experience many different people before they settle down and get married because then they feel as if they have experienced a "full" sexual, adventurous life. I encourage this, just as I encourage my "nice" trusting, loyal boyfriend to watch p*rn. Watching p*rn is an avenue for your man to release his natural need to look at other woman without ever cheating on you (and to learn some new moves!) Hell, I watch rugby games not only because it's an intriguing sport, but because of the insanely muscular dudes ripping each other apart who also love to pose naked for calendars. Mmm! I look at p*rn too - doesn't make me a bad, disloyal person! The "game" works both ways, girl. I'm young too - but I think the key to any healthy relationship is being completely open with one another and accepting what each other values, and their flaws - as long as harmless. Don't dump a guy because he wants to have sex with you - everyone has hormones and wants , including you, I'm sure - but that doesn't mean that both parties can't accept each others' values and suppress it. You will learn these things with time, but be aware of the other side of your emotions and thoughts right now. "Nice" guys are out there everywhere, some who will wait and some who just can't, just be open to everything and seed out the bad ones.

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  • :Youre not crazy sweetie,its just part of relationship you did your part and yet it wasn't good enough for them,i experienced that thing too end up to the wrong one... Nice guys are rare and always remmebr Sometimes love it can work out right, sometimes you never know but if it brings only pain into your life don't be afraid to let it go... Takecare and Godbless :))

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  • They are hard to find. There are a lot jerks out there these days, it seems it's better to just give up sometimes...

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  • maybe you're finding guys in the wrong places. try hanging out at like a soup kitchen or somewhere where good do-ers hang out. maybe just a simple concert...but bring a friend

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  • i was with a guy for 2 years have a kid for him and all he told me he didn fancy anyone else ect and didn seem intrested in other girls then I found out he made a facebook behind my back ya think ya now some one but you have to really get to now someone its all about trust and you should wait till you find the right person it may seem like forever but one day you will and you won't regret waiting either

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  • yes, theyre out there

    i have one you have one too

    dont get bitter, you'll find him

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  • You're like, exactly like me. I mean I hate all these pricks in high school. All it's about is sex and p*rn, getting some. I'm so sick of that. Is there such thing as feelings, or love anymore? Plus I don't know if I'll ever find someone I'll feel comfortable having sex with because I want it to be mutual. As in if they're MY first, I want to be THEIRS too. But because of how stupid youth is nowadays, no one waits for that special someone to share that moment with. I want to. But honestly I don't think I'll ever find someone right for me.

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    • You'll be in for a tough realization just like I had, It only gets worse in college and uni where hookups are the most common.

    • Stop dissing us Men are wonderful and complex.

  • OK For starters you are like every girl in your age group. You like scum, you don't know you like scum because you are young. I want to make this brief because most girls blow me off. get the bad boys out of your life NOW. If you don't then stop reading because this will be a waste of time.

    The "bad boys" are FU(KING LOSERS and the girls who pursue them are even worse. If bad boys are your preference than You R A Loser. Start thinking in th 21st Century where girls have "she balls" to pusue guys. If not . be content with the loser you described

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    • thanks I like how you used laddy balls and ya I have stoped likeing those kind of guys

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    • good for you girl!

    • Anyone that acts the same as they did in high school years later is an a**hole? I guess I'm an a**hole. But I'm changing... into a bigger a**hole. lol

  • Dude you're 16. At your age guys will be immature and nine times out of ten won't know how to treat a girl. Honestly high school relationships rarely last anyways because they have no depth. Focus on yourself and stop worrying about guys. Trust me the good ones always find you when you stop looking.

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  • There's plenty of nice, shy guys out there, but are too "scared" to make the first move.

    It's usually the popular, spoiled, overconfident guys who want nothing more than to "get it and get out".

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  • nope their is not ! our best bet is to find a guy who has a relationship with God. someone who is christian.

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    • Being a christian has nothing to do with this. Why would you even assume that?

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    • anyone that associates themselves with the myth of God is a lunatic

    • From what I've seen and heard religous people are the worst hypocrites because they pick and choose what applies to them and when it applies to them. I recall this one local church youth group a few years back now ending up in the papers because it had become a **** fest and most of the girls going there ended up pregnant. I couldn't believe it.

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