Can I be the one to initiate? Or am I out of line?

I am not sure what is wrong with me, but I have this "thing"

where I feel like I am being a pain if I text a guy first. And it's not that I do it all the time or everyday, but I have this impression that I (not all girls, just me) will seem needy or annoying if I ask a guy to hang out or if I text him first. (Someone once told me that if you call a guy/text a guy first, you are chasing him and girls are not supposed to chase men)


Am I being ridiculous? Is it okay for me to text you every now and then(without feeling terrible that I did). Or ask you to hang out?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I feel the same way, but I've learned that a guy will let you know if you're being a pain...usually by being short with you or not answering your text until forever later or at all. My current guy will always text back hello beautiful or ask me a question which let's me know he wants to talk. Most guys aren't very good with the whole phone/ texting thing. Taking initiative helps with that at little and shows them your confident.


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What Guys Said 1

  • It's okay, even desirable, for you to initiate. If everyone feels like a pain for texting, then no one texts and things don't get to happen as often. So, if you feel like texting, e-mailing, or calling, go for it.


What Girls Said 1

  • I initiate text with my crush first but now we text each other all the time. Sometimes he text first and sometimes I do. It doesn't really matter who text who first now as we both seem to enjoy it. You can know if he finds you annoying. He may not reply or doesn't seem to keep the convo going.