Dating girl with kids, can someone give me the 411?

Been on a few dates with this woman, she has kids that I haven't met. We hold hands and I'm sure she likes me, but she seems to be holding back on kissing and we haven't talked about her kids. Just would like to have some tips, or someone tell their experience dating someone with kids as I never have before. Thanks.

Updates:
Thanks for the comments. I think I'll slow down and make sure I really like her. As one of the guys said, there's plenty of women I'd like who don't have kids. And it seems with moms, you have to decide straight away whether you want a ltr with her.

0|0
4|2

Most Helpful Girl

  • As a single mom I tend to take thiings a lot slower with dating because I want to know as certainly as possible that this guy won't hurt me or mai daughter. There are a lot of creepers out there who are abusive or sick and mothers have to be careful that she's not inviting one to prey on her kid/s. Also kids are smarter than a lot of people give them credit for and it has an effect on them when you have different people popping in and out of their lives on a regular basis.

    So think of it as her screening you to make sure you're a good choice. It's a sign she's a good mom and cares a lot about who she has around her kids. Let her know if you're serious about her and don't ask to meet her kids if you don't plan on starting a serious relationship. And as HonestAbe said below you'll be a role model for these kids. Depending on the custody arrangement maybe even a father figure. Personally I would never expect a guy I'm seeing to be a father to mai daughter because she has one, but there are those who do desire that father figure. Make sure you can handle being looked up to and watched before you get seriously involved.

    Good Luck

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 3

  • i am a single mom and here are some things I have gathered when it comes to dating:

    you will need to be comfortable with the situation with the kids dad, you need to be able to be supportive of the situation and not add stress to her. it is already stressful I am sure. that is a huge deal breaker for me.

    be interested in her kids but not pushy about it. if she wants you to meet her kids its a good sign but a very big step for her

    kids come first ALWAYS. things come up all the time and you need to be OK with it. it is stressful when a guy gets upset over something you can't help.

    to a mom. there is nothing more sexy then a guy playing with her kids and making them laugh.

    0|0
    0|0
  • i'm a kid who saw her mother date and eventually get married. my mothers motto while dating was "all of us or none of us". if you want her to get closer to you, try showing interest in meeting her kids. they are a big part of her life and will always be more important. she is probably looking to see how reliable you are. a woman with kids will always be looking for someone she can trust with her children and she can trust with herself. hope that helps. because truth is, if you really want to get close to her, your going to have to work harder than you normally would.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Good for you

    0|0
    0|0

What Guys Said 2

  • You need to realize (the sooner the better) something. If you genuinely see yourself with this woman for the long haul, then you're going to be a "father" to these kids in some way, shape, or form. I'm assuming that she has sole custody of her kids. That means that they're gonna see you more than they see their own father. Speaking from the POV of someone that has a step-father, You're going to need to be someone that these kids can look up to as an adult. You can't escape it. Zombiechick hit the nail on the head when she said "all of us or none of us". That's the mentality that you need to keep in mind. It's all of them, or none of them. They're a package deal. If you can't deal with that, then you need to call it quits before you get in too deep. Best of luck, bro.

    2|0
    0|0
  • If you like kids then it wouldn't be to bad, I hate kids and don't like dating moms. Everyones different so it would be worth a try if you really like her, there's a lot of girls that you would like that don't have kids. She will bitch at you less because she has something more important than you to worry about. If you live a laidback, slow paced, no worry life that'll change.

    0|0
    0|0
Loading...