Any advice for dating women with kids?

So I'm 27 years of age, life happens to us all. Many women within my preferred age demographic (between 5 years younger or 5 years older than myself, though I'm willing to go outside this number) Have kids at this point.

Any advice for dating women who already have children?

p.s. I have no kids of my own.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Just be consistent and don't mess around with them -- or rather with their schedules. A friend of mine kept setting a date up with her new guy, which involved getting a sitter, making "space" in her schedule, etc. only for the guy to bail on her at the last minute, which meant she had to pay the sitter for the night, only to sit home watching Netflix.

    Be kind and respectful, but don't go overboard in terms of paying for things. Co-dependence can be a scary place. Open doors for her and treat her like a lady. If she's wearing something particularly nice, she'll appreciate you're telling her.

    If she's not introducing her to her kids right away, don't get upset. Single moms go through a lot of bad dates before meeting an actual good guy. When she's ready, she'll introduce you. If she introduces you to her kids on the first date, that's a sign of a flawed screening process on her part. (Not as a reflection on you at all. It's just one of those statistical facts.)

    Be nice to her friends. She may not have dated in a while and ask a friend to be wherever you agree to pick her up. Be kind to that over-protective friend who looks at you like she's going to club you and hide your corpse behind the couch. She means well and is just looking out for her girl. You'll appreciate her more if the relationship works out between you and your single-mom GF. :-)

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What Girls Said 17

  • hey! I am so glad to see that you are willing to date someone with children. I am 26 and have an 8 year old. I think the best advice I can give you is to try to include some activities that will include the child. of course, this is harder if the kids of are a younger age. I think the main things guys worry about is that women with kids are looking for a father. and that's not always true. they are just looking for someone that will accept the fact that they can't always pick up and go on the drop of a dime, and they want someone who will like their kids and include them.

    also, in my experience, I think guys are worried that they won't have time with just me. and that's not true either. I actually go out quite a bit. if I do get in a relationship with somone, eventually I will want them to include my daughter in activities and I will want them to hang out with both of us. hope this helped

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    • Thank you for the input.

      Yeah it's as though I would be seeking the approval of mom and the kid simultaneously.

      I hope I recieve lot's of responses to this one, from both girls And guys.

  • I don't see anything wrong with dating women with kids. After all, they are human with emotional needs. Date her, see if there is any chemistry between you two and the next step would be to know if you are ready to go further into the relationship with the full knowledge that you are dealing a woman who is also a single mother. If you can accept the fact that she is a single mother who will give her children the priority before you, and that you can accept her children, I think there shouldn't be any problem to continue on the relationship.

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  • I am a single 24 year old mother with a almost 4 year old. I am very protective over my daughter, and I have been in the "dating" limbo for 3 years. It's hard, but if you would like to date a girl with a kid, you need to have patience. I don't bring my daughter around guys unless I know he's serious about it as me. It's been almost 3 years, and she hasn't met a guy yet. A lot of guys lost patience with me because I can't just get up and go whenever they want or go out and do this during the week. So, patience would be number 1, and number 2 would be flexibility and understanding! It takes a special guy to want to date someone with kids, but if you like the mom enough, it should be an extra bonus in the relationship!

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  • U need to actually get along with the kids ,,, let me tell u something if the kid don't like u and u somehow get married the child will do the impossible to make sure u divorce

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  • Just like be nice to their kids and give them candy every once in a while

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  • Be honest with your intentions. I have no tolerance for time-wasters.

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  • Day time dates that kids can join just be understanding and try to see that for a single woman with kids sometimes its a struggle just to get out of the street door and her time is so limited as a mother dont get the wrong impression and think shes not interested

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  • I dated a guy who had kids once. When she gets to know you well enough she'll introduce you to them. Just be yourself and let her know you like kids and it's not a problem. Some women feel as though men don't like the 'extra baggage'. Good luck. :)

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  • If she wants meet her kids nothing wrong with dating someone with kids I will say tho her kids will need lots of attention depending the age

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  • Show interest ! Ask her about them and what they like etc :)

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  • Do you want to be a step fsther? I don't know where you love but none of the girls I know in that age range are with kids

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  • Do not try taking their mother away from them. It hurts the kid more than you think. Kids are really smart and they are manipulative. If you're going to fight with their mom try not to do it in front of the kids.

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  • Get to know the kids, have them like you. When a guy cares or shows affection for a kid, especially your own, it's attractive.

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  • some mothers are crazy but the good ones doesn't make you question if she is right for you. the only thing that you can show a single mom is love and what a real man is and suppose to be, when you enter a relationship with a single mom you shouldn't think that you're going to be a dad or she's not going to have enough time to hang out like single folks, what you are going to date is woman not a girl, so act that way, if it's too much be a man and say how you feel.

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  • i'm a 25 year old mom of a 4 year old kid...i can say that it's OK to date a single mom but you need to accept first that she had a kid already and her first priority is her kid..if you really love the single mom well show her that you care about her kid.. well I can say a single mom is more matured than the others because she experience the life alone with a child

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  • even mommys need loving

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What Guys Said 4

  • Stay away from the ones that can't keep their parental life separate from their social life. If she seems intent on having you meet her kid(s) very early on, that isn't a good sign. Of course you want to meet the tyke(s) eventually, but not within the first few dates.

    Be patient, single moms are, by default, very busy people, realize that you may not see each other as often as you would like, there will be very few, if any, impromptu get-togethers, and even the most carefully planned dates are subject to last minute cancellations.

    You have to be able to accept that fact that you are not, and never will be, her number one priority. Her kid(s) come first and if you can't accept that, or even worse, if you try and change that, it isn't going to work out.

    Realize that when you are with her, it is her opportunity to stop being a mom and just be a woman, don't let her motherly instincts take over. Be the assertive male figure that makes the decisions, takes care of the problems and makes her feel special. She spends most of her life worrying about a lot of things, try and make your time together as carefree for her as possible, and she will continue to want to spend time with you.

    No matter how much you like kids, approach the thought of meeting her kid(s) with a little bit of apprehension, if you seem too excited it sets off alarm bells in the protective mother part of her brain.

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  • Everything moaterboat said is accurate I can really say much without repeating what he said but in the past I have gone out with a few single moms and its tough you have to remember you won't be a priority but another thing I didn't like was that I happened was that if you interact with their kids if its asking them how they are or playing games or showing you their toys the mom is quick to act to the kid so you they don't get to attached to so speak. One single moms daughter showed some doll toys to me and asked what I thought and the mom jumped up yelled at her daughter said "You don't know him , he don't know you so leave him alone" This was so awkward witnessing this I just decided to not see her again. Bad story I know.

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  • Yeah, don't

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  • Be nice too the kids and she will be nice to you

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