Am I a shallow b*** for not dating someone because of what my friends will think?

I am an ardent believer that you should do whatever makes you happy. But recently I've been having some problems taking my own advice. There is this friend I have who is the EPITOME of dorkyness at my school...and I've found myself falling for him? I don't know what to do...I'm a big dork myself (although I can hide it very well) and I feel like...he's the male version of me (a scary thought I can assure you) . I just don't know what to do. The only thing that's really keeping me from dating him is his "social status" I suppose. But that makes me feel terrible about myself...That shouldn't be the only reason why I don't...but I can't help but feel...self conscious...especially when my friends (although they're great and everything) are the people that they are. Help me please?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think you know your answer just by how your feeling. Your talking about a guy who has that possibility to be in your life forever. Your friends should support and be happy for you but don't allow them to influence or controll your decisions based on their opinions or reactions. But at the same time if your friends can't accept him with you, it may add a lot of stress to the relationship and you, depending on a lot of things. Plus who's to say his friends aren't thinking the same about you. It really shouldn't matter at all and I would go for it and see what happens. Would you rather make your friends happy or date the most incredible but dorky guy who treats you amazing and makes you happiest. Possibly of course. . .

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What Guys Said 5

  • I am less concerned about the boy than I am about your girlfriends. If you are questioning how they will treat you based on which boy you choose to date then you should really reconsider your friends.

    This obviously leads to the answer to your question. Yes, you are shallow. If you connect with someone on deep levels but don't date him because of surface reasons then that is the definition of shallow.

    I hope you can get past what your friends will think and give things a chance with this guy if he really is someone you connect with.

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  • "Am I a shallow bitch for not dating someone because of what my friends will think?"

    Short answer, yes.

    Long answer, yes but it's not something most girls haven't done before.

    Ask yourself this: Are these people my friends because they like me for who I really am, or are they my friends because of what they think I can do for their social status? Do they really care if I am happy?

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  • I you really were falling for him. you would not care what your friends would say or need to be told to by random people on the Internet. the only advice I think I am able to give is that you might need to look at new friends if their snobby enough to care what "Class" some one is. my bother married a girl that was from a very poor family and none of his gave a damn and nether did we.

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    • It's not so much about "class" and I'm sure my friends would accept him (well my best friend would. Idc about the other two lol ) if I really liked him. He's just...very socially awkward ? I mean he's by far the smartest person at our school and for reasons I'm not quite sure he's accumulated a following a people who don't like him? I just feel like I'm going to get unrelentless rap from everyone if I admit to my feeings.

    • sorry about the class thing, it sounded like that might be one of the big things. still, you would not have to ask the internet if you really liked him. I've only been out of HS for two years and do you know how many people I remember? 3? the girl I liked, the guy I hated, and the guy in my algebra class that I still hang with from time to time. you like this guy, to hell with every nameless person you will forget half way through you freshmen year in collgie.

  • Social status be damned

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  • nope. your not shallow. your just dumb as hell for that. in matters of style, flow like the wind. in matters of substance, stand like a rock. You got some real bitchy gf's doe.

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What Girls Said 1

  • yes you are. Date the guy if you really like him and he likes you back. Forget about your friends' reactions.

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