Why did he say that we were good when his best friend asked how we were? We broke up last night

I had to break up with my boyfriend last night because we're both two different religions. I'm perfectly fine with that but his religion is against us dating. We're both falling for each other but I feel like he would never let it work out. I'm broken up inside because of it. I've been crying all day. One of his best friends asked me for advice for his girlfriend so I helped him out. I then told him that we were broken up figuring he already knew but he didn't. He told me that he thought it was a mistake and that he was going to talk to him. So he calls up my ex and asks him how he's doing. He then asks how we're doing and he says we're good. I don't understand why he wouldn't tell his best friend. Is he just trying to have a single night tonight and then try to work things out tomorrow? I'm so confused.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think he's having a hard time getting over you, and doesn't want to accept it, so that's why he acts that way towards you. As for his actions towards his friend though, I think he was putting on a defense mechanism to avoid seeming bummed or confronting the situation with him. All in all, I think he still wants you around, but understands there can't be anything serious... while inside he wants there to be... so I think this is a case of him holding onto you because he doesn't want to let go. My advise is to talk to him and tell him that you know its difficult on both parts of this relationship... but if either of you are going to have any hopes in moving forward and past it, its time to accept the losses and continue with life. Let him know that you're sorry how things turned out, but (unless he were to defy his parents, which I don't see happening) things are inevitable, and both of you need to face it. Tell him to hate you if he wants, or to understand, but you're moving on and "this is good bye." Don't be concerned afterward on how he reacts. If his friend wants to swear about you and stuff, that's their dilemma, not yours. The longer you try to figure things out and make things work, or the more you try to get feelings and reactions out of each other, the more its just going to hurt... and the more difficult it will be to move on. End it because you know its what needs to happen. It'll take time and some pain to get through it, but it'll only get worse (as you said yourself) the longer you let it go on. So you just need to be strong and do what needs to be done. I would suggest just ending this relationship for good though. You need to move on, he needs to move on. And the dramatic freak outs he displays just isn't going to help.

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What Guys Said 2

  • u just have to remember one thing. guys think and feel differently than you do. most guys will cope with their emotions differently than girls can quite understand. and it looks in this situation like he's trying to not let others see his feelings. not a big surprise really

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  • Go have a slumber party!

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What Girls Said 6

  • He's in denial.. plus honey he is struggling with his heart and with his faith... I can't tell you what he will do... I personally do not subscribe to organized religion and this is one of the main reasons.. who cares.. Can you convert? I mean you seem to be fine with it all. I am not downplaying or mocking your devotion to your religion but obviously his is a HUGE thing for him other wise he would've been like "Whatever" you know

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  • He ain't worth the bother, I am muslim too and that's bull he's peddling to you. When I was living in London, I had christian boyfriends and my parents didn't mind.
    He's using you; "if one of us falls for the other" sounds as if he wants a f*** buddy.
    Trust me, he has got his friend to call you up and act all dumb about it all, they're all words and you're better than that.
    He knows how to work you.
    Ditch this guy and his number.

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    • His friend legitimetely didn't know. I know that it wasn't a set up. He talked to me about it for an hour and told me that I made a mistake and need to talk to him. I know it wasn't fake. And I know what you mean about being able to date other religions, but there's also the traditional muslims that still believe in arranged marriages and not dating outside of their religion.

    • still no excuse to let you hear someone say stuff about you like that; he blows hot and cold

    • I'm muslim too and live in Egypt and I can tell you that in our religion it is o.k to get married from others so that is not an excuse but I think he do this because of his family and after that he know that he made a mistake and he want to make things right

      actually I think this is his way to work it out so why don't you get him another chance?

  • It doesn't mater if he is muslim or not . the fact is he is a guy who clearly loves you. He is now torn between his feelings and culture/ religion and such. It is understandable in a way. If you love him think about what you want to do. You could try and work it out . Or you could walk away and try to move on.

    My advice ? stick with him. don't ever walk away from someone who returns your feelings to please other people. especially not close minded once !

    Good luck !
    - Frann

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  • I think your ex, firstly is jealous that if other people find out you broke up with him then they would want you, men are weird that way, and on the othe hand maybe he still loves you but is scared to admit it because that would make it reality an dhe is scared of his parents. But never the less, you don't deserve someone who can stand up when things go bad.

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  • Stop talking to him. Stop texting. Stop calling. This is unhealthy. You deserve more. Steer clear of him and his friend.

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  • The feelings of the thing let nature take its course
    ... I from china...

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