Your opinion on online relationships?

I feel like meeting people online is getting more legit (and common), you know?

What do you think? Any thoughts on the topic...


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think meeting people online is great. However, only fit for the introduction phase. Relationships should be tangible. They should be physical. They should stimulate all your sensations; not only your sight and hearing. I don't do long distance relationships, or the newly developing form of long distance relationships, e-relationships.

    I don't intentionally mean to put down anyone in such a relationship but I view them as devaluing who you are. To me it's like settling for someone less attractive than you simply because your not confident enough to go after someone above your pay grade. It's cowardice. It's being afraid to end up alone so you tell yourself I'm not alone... there is someone waiting for me hundreds or even thousands of miles away. It's something I will never do.

    If you're not tangible, you're not real. That is my view.

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    • I think I'd agree with that, the only exception being if there's something getting in the way of meeting in person... I feel like if you've got a connection and intentions to meet, but you have to wait because of timing/distance/etc. it might still be okay...

    • I couldn't even do that.

      If something comes up, I'm distraught for whatever reason, I want to have the capability of calling up my girlfriend at absolutely anytime and saying "I could use someone to talk to right now. Lets go grab a coffee". We talk over coffee than go back to whose ever place is closer and sleep together. Morning rolls around and I feel like gold.

      Sex is the worlds most powerful healing remedy and accessibility is important to me.

    • Haha. Yeah... I dunno, I see both sides of the argument. Not sure I have a strong feeling one way or the other yet.

What Guys Said 26

  • Chatting online is fine. When it comes time to meet, do it in a very public place. There are a million creeps out there.

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  • I like talking to people online but I despise those online relationship sites. I tried that about a couple years ago and I ended up only getting 2 girls to talk to me. And one of them just contacted me to know if I had any weed lol.

    Plus I feel like I can't trust people 100% on those things because I never know if a girl I meet on there is really just some 40 year old hamburgered face guy with a mustache.

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  • I think it's a very pathetic way to 'meet' people. Sure it works sometimes, bt so would throwing darts at a board with people's names on it.

    People are wasting their time for the most part. Get out into the open air already! It's a lot healthier

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    • i 2nd that =]

    • What about those of us who can't stand the open air because there's absolutely nothing (and no one) here?

      That's my problem. I live in a pretty remote area, there are no girls around and I have too many morals to allow myself to go clubbing or to a bar. Online seems safer to me.

  • If you meet them online but then see each other in person it's a relationship. But if it's strictly online its not a relationship. Just my opinion.

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  • If you are going to meet people online, they HAVE to be in your area. Do not chase the pipe dream thinking you can make it work long distance. That does not work. Do NOT fool yourself. I was young like that too, I was a freakin stud on Myspace. I had 3 girlfriends that were all long distance, and none worked out. I met one for a few days, then that fizzled out. It's really pointless unless you can see each other every day.

    I know most girls think "But I love him so much, you don't even know!" Yes, I do know. I've been through this whole circus that is online dating (through social networking sites), and the results leave you deep in regret and a hell of a lot worse than you felt prior to the relationship. Don't do it.

    Who am I kidding... who can talk sense into teens?

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    • Bullsh*t, it works fine if there's love, trust, and understanding. The problem is people fail at the very least one of those (it's usually the trust part).

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    • You are 18. You haven't experienced sh*t.

    • im with you bro

  • i played video games online on my PC from a young age. so I've been chatting to people online since the internet was a new thing in the mid 90s. during that time I met a number of people that, if I met them today, I would probably end up meeting them in person. I didn't use AIM however, there was no social networks like Facebook, and I didn't have a cell phone, so over the years I eventualy lost contact with a few people that I became really good friends with online.

    so I think in todays day and age its totally legit. pretty much everyone uses the internet and its easy to bump into people and chat them up. its also easy to stay in touch. just by frequenting this site, I get friend requested by other people, and I start to chat with them and become friends. I could see myself becoming friends with them outside the original scope of our friendship (in this case, it would be by visiting this site to chat with them).

    of course you do have to becareful about stalkers and psychopaths, but I think that comes from experience.

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  • Yeah I met my ex- girlfriend online...we chatted for a year online then she came to visit...that's when we really fell in love.I moved 3000 miles away to Canada to live with her.We lived together for another year.Problem was I didn't think anything through and was there illegally.Finding and keeping a job there without legal documents was very difficult so I had to move back to the states...

    it worked for a while though :P

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  • Reason being a lot of people don't get time to dedicate to some place for socialising or hooking up with someone... Online is convenient and easy.

    My problem is that looking at someone's picture often foxes you into perceiving them for someone they are not.

    One-on-One conversation is the best.

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  • Well I randomly met the girl I currently like because my friend gave her my screen name. She was having computer problems and he thought I would be the best person for advice. At the time she was dating his cousin. Anyway, time has gone by and now that she is single, we've been talking a lot more by text, aim, skype. We can't hang out in person since we both go to different colleges but we can hang out during breaks and summer. We have a beach trip planned with friends so I'm really excited to see how things go.

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  • I have seen a few successful very happy relationships. via online. The chances aren't incredibly high but it really is a fast way to find people and get to know someone.

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  • Met the girl I'm dating right now online and she's amazing! We never would have met had it not been for the internet.

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    • What site or whatever did you meet through? How far away do you live?

  • I think it is just another way to meet people and has nothing special except that you can lie about every thing in your life

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    • You can lie in person as well though. And online relationships turn offline; it's not as though they stay offline forever.

  • Its great... but there are still problems with it. First off, they are human beings with real issues/drama... I recently married my online relationship (of 5 years)... ups and downs happen in any/every relationship, but it is magnified due to distance, time zones, etc... People have to consider this when they start meeting (and liking) these 'cool people' online... it's just like in any regular relationship... My wife is from OR, I'm from GA.. so there's a few culture clashes, stuff like that there. Just 'consider the cost', or make an informed decision when you decide to pursue a online/long-distance relationship.

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  • id say online dating is a more convenient way to meet people. without all the the hassle of going to a bar. online is more personal, one on one type of thing. at the bar, if you like a person that's surround by their friends its intimidating because its like you have to impress the persons friends first before you get the girl or guy whatever.

    theres pros and cons to both. me personally I have never had problems meeting gfs, or making friends. never resorted to dating sites. iam on dating sites though just to see whos interested lol. one of the biggest cons about online dating is the fact that, the person that's in their profile pic may not be the person you end up eventually meeting

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  • worthless.

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  • Sounds a little pitiful to me, but ya know if it's your thing who am I to judge?

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  • ive tried online dating, the only problem is people always go for the pics. I've met some really shallow girls online. and I feel like its very impersonal, its easy to lie in that paragraph you have to write.

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  • I think its a very scary thing. How do you know who they are just because it says on their profile. I could write John Smith and my true name is Roger Jones.There's to much at stake and I wouldn't do it.

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  • I like it. I feel confortable by doing it often. I'm not a weirdo if I'm doing it, I used to think in other way before.

    I enjoy to spend just an hour and talk on MSN or exchanging tweets. I dislike Facebook though, I don't know... is getting a little obsolet that thing, I think that you can only used Fb to channel your blogs and other sites. Put your sites in the tab information so you can make yourself more interesting, like I don't know for example: Write your twitter, flickr, posterous and tumblr account. And just for that I feel sofisticated and more important. it's a way to channel yourself online and not giving to Facebook all your content to display to your contacts.

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  • Tough but doable. Just as long as both are being honest, both trust each other, and both do their best to stay in contact and meet physically as much as they can over the year, ya, doable and such.

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  • It is more or less unnatural. You have to do with a kind of ghost and it is the opposite of romanticism. Also it isn`t much sucessful. Nearly I am wondering, that more and more people go this way.

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  • I know someone who met her husband in a Harry Potter chat room and it turned out fine. I myself haven't, but I'd be willing to give it a shot.

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    • haha! that's pretty fantastic.

  • i think its interesting to meet people from new places but I've never actually thought of doing it online with all the news stories about how bad it is, but I suppose it would be nice if it worked

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  • Nothing legit about it, it's all nonsense. You could do just as well picking names out of a hat.

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  • I think its good ..

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  • Is becoming common because people use to go online just to meet people, new people or even friends..By the way.. would you like to be the first friend on my list? :D..

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    • Ha, sure... friend request me?

What Girls Said 34

  • i met my husband online we have been together for 5 years and married for 4 years and now expecting our second child. I think it works if you can make the time and understand that its not always going to work but you have to put your self out there to find out the possibilities.

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  • I heard somewhere that 1/5 relationships starts on a dating site, these days.

    So yeah, definitely more legit and common, especially if you consider this doesn't count the ones that started on Facebook through mutual friends / contacts and other social networking websites.

    Personnaly, I'd be really hesitant for two reasons.

    1) The "psycho" factor

    You never know when you can get abducted/sold/pimped out/killed/raped etc... If I ever was to meet someone from the internets (which I did once after like a year of talking, and we weren't romantically interested in each other. In fact he was gay lol) I'd take my sweet time getting to know the guy. And I'd take the usual precautions (public place, telling someone where I am, what I'm doing an with whom, when I'm supposed to be coming back etc)

    2) I once had an online relationship. In fact it was my first relationship ever, I was 15 and the guy took advantage of that (also he knew damn well that legal age of consent in my country is 14 for girls). He was French (and 26), and everything was going well. He was coming to see me in Canada the next summer, yippee etc.

    We met on a Harry Potter website and as I was talking to another female member, we realized he was playing both of us.

    So I confronted him, and he admitted that he was an heroin addict! He talked to her when he was high, and to me when he was sober. So I'm like OKAY f*** you then.

    So we weren't "together" (to use the term loosely) but I still talked to him from time to time.

    Next thing I know, he disappears from the face of the earth. I was worried about his safety since he was a junkie so I sent him physical letters (I had his home adress) and never got an answer.

    And THEN I receive an e-mail from a friend of his who's letting me knwo he's in JAIL for f***ing a THIRTEEN YEARS OLD. (apparently she wanted to, but her parents still sued. Is that true? I don't know).

    So that was it for me.

    So yeah, I'm definitely aware that people aren't always what they make themselves out to be on the web... Maybe I'm too cautious because of that.

    But I do know a lot of people whose relationship started on the internet and it worked out fine.. I guess it's a chance you have to take.

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  • I think it's a great way to meet people. I met the guy I am seeing right now online, and he is great :) I think it is better sometimes than going to a club. You usually meet the same people when you go out, so it's nice to meet people who are not someone you would normally meet. Plus you can screen them first. You can read their profile, look at their pictures and ask them questions online, talk to them on msn, whatever. It helps you to find out if their interests and yours are a like or not.

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  • i've met some cool people online but for all the cool people I've come across some lame idiots who basically wasted my time and messed my head up ! that was a few years ago ..Just as you would be careful with a stranger in the street becareful online ...your young and it's all the rage to do the networks BUT by far the best way to get to know them is in the 'REAL' people who hide their pictures etc etc be very careful indeed ...BUT all in all life on the net is going to get more and more I think !

    cheers have a great day

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  • I wouldn't be alive if it hadn't been for an internet relationship. My parents though, knew what they were getting in to, they worked for the same company but one in the USA office and one in the UK office so they could check each other out and find out that they were truly who they said they were. It wasn't like an internet dating site or anything, just a prehistoric form of instant messaging between different sectors of the same company.

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  • Meeting someone online is all well and good, but when it comes to sustaining a longterm reationship only over online, I'd tend to shy away from that. After all, you can't have any physical contact - touching, hugging, kissing, etc (not just sexual). You can't actually see their emotions; you can't look into their eyes to see if what they're saying is legit. Sure, you could webcam, but I just don't feel like its the same thing. This however is only my personal opinion, and I'm sure there are people out there who make it work.

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  • meh! You don't get the physical contact. If you met and are dating them in-person fine. But online is like long distance = not worth it if you don't know the person.

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  • It's definitely getting more common and I guess is more legitimate, considering it wasn't even regulated years ago, but it's still a fantastically bad idea and I don't do it

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  • I believe you can't reveal your heart and soul to someone unless you have some sort of in person contact but, I believe it is a great way to start a relationship or keep something that has already started going.

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  • I used to be SUPER judgmental about it. My aunt married a guy she'd met online and then he turned out to be a fraud, so that didn't help my opinion.

    then I ate my words when I signed up as a semi-joke with a friend, and then met my first love who I was with for 2.5 years before an amicable split.

    But its getting to be more accepted, and also can be very successful.

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    • Not to mention, my friend made a great point back when I was nervous to tell people how we met, and he said that it's not so different when people put "looking for: a relationship and dating" on their Facebook profiles.

  • I don't agree to it and I think it's just an easy quick fix to being lonely and wanting acceptance. Plus once you get to a certain level of knowing someone if you don't have the intimacy of being close to them you end up falling apart... I say no to online dating services and anything else you can throw at meh :P

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  • I'm not sure as I have always thought how do I know that person is really who they say they are

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  • relationship wise:I think its hard. and there's so much trust you have to have and integrity.There's temptation because you could get away with cheating. I wouldn't go for it.

    Friends wise: Its tricky. and its true its becoming very common I agree. But I don't know about legit you never know who people are on the internet now these days

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  • I think meeting people online is great! For the special few I met in person as well it's been awesome! :) I met my boyfriend online and we've been together over a year now.

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  • I don't believe in online relationships because you can't see the person or have any kind of physical relationship with them. Being with the person is better than hiding behind a computer screen.

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    • I suppose... but what if the intent is to meet at some point? Isn't it good to get to know someone and learn to like them because of their personality and whatnot rather than looks? I mean, I know there is some physical aspect of initial attraction, but... I dunno...

    • I guess you can meet people, but still they should be in your area so you can meet them.

  • Watch the movie Catfish. It has to do with this topic.

    I think they are getting more common, but I don't think I could see myself getting into one.

    I've been texting someone for the past 3 months with no other contact, but we met each other in person and worked together. It's just weird how you can sustain any kind of relationship (not just romantic) without talking to or seeing someone.

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  • I wouldn't do online dating. you never know who you are really talking to online. I prefer dating people I know.

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  • you can meet all kinds of new people online: good and bad :)

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  • it more common than people think, statistics should be reviewed. People is seeing and realizing the pros of online dating, sometimes its even safer than meeting people at the bar. But you know its case to case basis as everything else is.

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  • I personally don't see myself doing it, but I'm sure there are other people who have gotten in to good relationships with people they've met online.

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  • I used to think it was stupid until I met my boyfriend online from Facebook in nov. my cousin goes to the same school as him 6 hours away.

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  • I get what your saying...I mean when people talk online they are not afraid to show there real self...

    they have nothing to lose so way not just be yourself?:P

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  • its seem to be a common thing to do these days but you need to be careful because there are a lot of dangerous people in this world and they might use online dating to rape people

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  • My dad found his girlfriend online.. and they are getting married in August :) so I guess its good!

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  • What? Seriously?

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  • At first, it is fun to get someone to chat with. Later on I found the following fact:

    1. In real life, your chance for meeting with new people are limited only in your society. For example, if you are an investment banker, most of the time in your life, you would meet with millionaires, investors, business people, office colleagues, secretaries, etc. Your society helps screening level of people who enter your life. You know who they are or, at least, how they look, at least, at a glance. But for online society, you will never know whether you are chatting with the drug addicted who doesn't have any job, living at the basement of his Mom's house, or a real handsome police officer, etc.

    In short, you go out of your social level when you go on line and often find out you wasted months or years, with looser.

    2. You get yourself lost into the illusion world. Your turn to believe what you want to believe, in stead of using all your senses you have to analyze all the fact about the person on another end of the internet line. In fact, you don't really have a chance to use all five senses you have when dealing with online people. You don't see the real of them, you don't sense how clean they are, you don't know how much debt they have, etc.

    3. There are more cheater there on the online world. I used to know a guy who chat 5 screens with different girls at the same time. He went out to meet with any girl who agreed to meet with him. Yuck!

    But of course, each of them contact you as good-looking, nice, good heart, sincere, successful, lonely man looking for real love and want to settle down with you... always...

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  • When you are in a online relationship, does that mean you are faithful too? I'm confused, how do you develop a full scale relationship without having sex with that person?

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    • Oh, yeah, that's sketchy for sure. I guess I was thinking of more like, meeting people online, then developing a romantic relationship after having met them in person, too.

  • I met someone online almost three years and we developed an instant relationship. We became official but just recently broke up because of the distance. We live in different states and it was really hard. I started crushing on someone else and that was the end of that.

    I don't regret it because he was my first love and my first many things but it just caused a lot of stress and heartache. We drifted apart - I no longer felt loved and started looking for it somewhere else. I hurt him when I broke up with him and that hurt me because I still have love for him. It was just something that had to be done.

    Meeting someone online is OK as long as it doesn't become a long distance relationship. LDRs suck. Take it from me.

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  • Online dating? Perfectly fine. We already use the internet so much in our daily lives (news source, pay bills, buy shoes, etc.) so why not find a date? It's hardly for desperate people and creepers, I think that stigma has rightfully faded. Everyone and their mother uses the internet now.

    Online relationships? Stupid. If there's no timely transition from internet chats/email/texting to at the very least phonecalls/skype if you're long-distance then it's just infatuation and blind faith. You have to meet to have a relationship. To pick up on body language, scent, intonation...all those quirks.

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    • Best answer.

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    • What we're talking about is relationships that start online and that they can't go on indefinitely, Leto.

    • Oh well then ya,prolly. But who knows, I'm sure there's that one rare case where it could work. But I'm not sure what kinda people would really like that.

  • If I met a person in person I'd still like to get to know them online, like through chat or emails.

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