Why guys always disappear on me?

Idk why they always take me out on a date, or 2 dates, followed up with either a fone call or a text message saying they had a great time and we should hang out again soon, but then after that they just seem to disappear? I never did anything too much, after they text me I just reply briefly saying I also enjoyed myself the other night and I am def up for meeting up again. Those guys are all from a dating site. And they all said they were attracted to me. So what's the deal? Why this keeps happening to me?

Updates:
I am a lady with class so I don't even kiss on first date. And most of the guys that I choose to meet up with are decent, they are serious about meeting new people, not looking for a hookup or anything. And of course we exchange messages to get to know a little bit about each other before we exchange numbers and arrange for meeting up. And they always say how I know how to hold my conversations and that I'm very smart. I just don't quite get it. It happened to me 3 times and is pissing me off.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Because you didn't put out. Most guys on dating sites are looking for an easy lay. Otherwise, I would guess that another girl has peaked their interest or that there's something unlikeable about you.

    ~Distant

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    • could be the second reason. that makes a lot more sense now lol but it can't just happen to me so many times like that?! Plus if there's something unlikable about me, why did they call me saying they had a great time and wanted to see me again?

    • I guess it's just luck. Some guys will call and lie to you so you keep waiting for them to get back in touch without planning to do so. I would say it's my first suggestion, haha. Just because you exchange e-mails and get to know them doesn't mean they really want something more than sex.

      ~Distant

    • haha in that case I think I'm lucky I never hear from those guys again. But I'm not looking for a boyfriend and I made it clear with them already lol. I mean who would look for a boyfriend on a dating site? I just wanna have fun and enjoy someones company that's all I'm looking for.

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What Guys Said 5

  • hard to give you an exact answer because don't know your personality...but if there's chemistry no reason y you can't kiss him...he may think you are not that interested even if you say you are...body language says a lot. just keep going at it...dating is a numbers game...and people just keep getting to be pickier and some guys just want sex even if they say they want dating.

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  • To answer this question I first need some additional info:

    1) Do you have sex on the first or 2nd date?

    2) Do the guys know how you look (on the dating site)

    3) Are you the same person in real life than you're in the virtual one?

    4) How quick do you meet with a guy?

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    • : I am a lady with class so I don't even kiss on first date. And most of the guys that I choose to meet up with are decent, they are serious about meeting new people, not looking for a hookup or anything. And of course we exchange messages to get to know a little bit about each other before we exchange numbers and arrange for meeting up. And they always say how I know how to hold my conversations and that I'm very smart. I just don't quite get it. It happened to me 3 times and is pissing me off.

  • 3 times? There are people that try that 20 and are still single. Just try again. It doesn't work out that soon.

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    • haha how come everybody assumes I want a boyfriend? I'm perfectly fine being single, the only reason I join that dating site is because I'm bored of the same people around me and wanna make new friends, and have some fun.

    • Everybody asumes that, because that is usual when you join dating site.

      And that may be reason why they disapear. They hope for something more than friendship and when they find out that you are perfectly happy being single ... c'mon, you said that they told you that they are attracted to you from your looks at least. Knowing that they will be friends, that's ice cold shower. I do not wonder that they stop talking to you.

  • guess there dnt agree with your roles on first date

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  • they might be doing it do build up there confidence or they just showing interest to try and be polite and avoid making an awkward situation

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What Girls Said 3

  • it's not you, it's them. they clearly have a problem being around you, intimidated maybe? or they wanted to see if they could get sex afterward. you know how guys are, some expect girls to invite them to their place afterward. I've gone out with 3 guys, 2 of them stopped communication a few days after I texted/called them, and the other one is a no show. also, maybe they were being nice by saying they had a good time in order to not look like the bad guy. they might have not felt a connection, sometimes that happens. I got a little disappointed when that happened, but not that much because girl, that is one less douche to worry about!

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    • lol if they didn't feel the connection I'm pretty sure I could tell. But they all seem to really enjoy talking to me. They talked a decent amount and asked a decent amount of questions. I could also tell from their body language that they were leaning toward me and stuff. But normally if they don't feel the connection why bother calling me for a follow up? Because I never call or text a guy first after a date. They would be the ones who initiate contact after the date.

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    • Nah, they're not worth my try. Thanks girlie for your answer. :D

    • there are many more guys out there to get to know, and who will keep their word. just focus on dedicating time for yourself and your girl friends. girls can be so much more reliable than guys. you're welcome =)

  • If a man is interested in you as a person, they will go to you. This is regardless of whether they just want sex or they want to get married. If they stop contact with you, they simply lost interest. Men are pretty easy to read in that sense.

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  • Men aren't wired to stick around or be monogamous.

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