He keeps calling and texting....

Before I go into the details, let it be known that I DO feel bad that he misses me, but I just wish he would stop calling :/

He and I started dating in the summer of 2010 and it ended promptly the day before New Years (boohoo) on mostly his terms. He basically ignored me for a week, lied to me about really stupid things, etc. He claimed I liked him way more than he liked me, which was mostly true, and then went on to say that he wished he liked me more. Basically he said that I was everything he asked for, but somehow not what he wanted. But he didn't want to break up, I wasn't going to be 'that girl' to wait around, so I'm the one who broke it off.

I get over it crazy fast, have the time of my life, and literally a week later he calls to "see how I'm doing." And from then until feb, even after I left town to university, he just kept calling.

Every single time he told me he wanted me back, he made a mistake, was extremely self deprecating and begged every time. But I was already over him, had very little feelings for him, and was generally uninterested. I tried to like him for about a week, but then promptly told him to just stop trying because I'm not going to ride this emotional roller-coaster anymore. I'm not going to give a second chance to a guy who didn't really want me AND treated me like crap, even if it was just a week.

Now, I have a new boyfriend. He knows this. He's known since March when we became Facebook official. Yet, he still insists on calling me on random nights, sends me random goodnight text messages, and other general things. The other day he called me randomly just as my boyfriend got here, so after we hung up he sent me a passive aggressive text message on how he hoped I enjoyed the company more that I would enjoy talking to him. Seriously?

I get it, we could be friends, but a midnight chat where you talk about how "lonely" you are is not friendly. I don't know how to politely tell him to stop. I've already told him there was no chance in hell it would everrrrr happen again and that he should move on but he's clearly not :/


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I laughed at the idea of being Facebook official. Seriously though there is a saying that "You don't know what you got til it's gone". Honostly the best way to end the constant contact is by a clean break. Just ignoring him I know it sounds mean but the constant contact will just string him along.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Guys should read this war story and learn to get the hint when a female doesn't want you. But anyways, the best way to move on from this...is to ignore him. If you don't reply to his text messages, if you don't pick up his phone calls AND if you don't call him back...you won't have this problem. Your ex is not getting the hint even with the presence of your new boyfriend so you gotta break in the 'No Contact' rules. You can't be friends with him because he is always going to want more and, as you said, that is not going to happen. And doesn't this bother your boyfriend?! Easier said than done I know but you seem to be going at this the right way...now all you gotta do is just...stop talking to him. If he continues to call/text/email...let him, just do NOT respond back. One day, hopefully sooner rather than later, he will get the idea.

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What Girls Said 1

  • I am in the exact same situation as you, I started dating a guy summer of 2010 and dumped him a day before new years. I have clearly moved on, started dating again and he knows this. Recently I started to get really close with one of his good friends, but we were forced to end it as he began to claim that he 'loved me'.

    I confronted him a few weeks ago, and he broke down crying and told me that I'm all he wants and would do anything to get me back. Its been 5months and I can still not believe that he has not moved one, he has girls practically throwing themselves at him, yet he still wants him.

    So I explained that nothing was ever going to happen, that I wasn't going to get back with him and that I had stopped feeling anything for him. He told me that he understood this, and that he knew I had made my decision and that I wasn't going to change this. He explained that he was trying to move on in his own way, and that it would take time, because he certainly wasn't interested in anyone else.

    I guess all you can do is be patient, he obviously likes you and it would be so hard for him to see the girl he likes with another guy. Soon enough he will get the idea, and move on

    Good luck

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