How do guys feel about a girl wanting to become friends and isn't interested in romantic dating?

I like meeting new people and tend to like to hang out one on one with them. I meet interesting guys sometimes when I am out socializing with acquaintances. I'll ask them to hang out later. It feels somewhat awkward doing so once I've hung out with them again. Usually our personalities click and they find me attractive but I'm not ready to date. I just want friends. I feel guilty asking them to hang out because I'm afraid of leading them on. Any advice?


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What Guys Said 2

  • I have no problem with it, but first impressions are everything with me. If I start out with no intentions of dating you, it's pretty set in stone. I know this one girl, she's attractive as all else, smart, funny, enjoyable, you name it. But right off the bat, we went into it as just friends. Even though I've gotten the vibe on multiple occasions that she seems interested in more now, it's never going to happen. My mind is made up about her and that isn't ever going to change.

    Likewise, if I start out interested in a woman and that interest continues for any length of time, becoming "just friends" is also no longer an option. Once a my mind is made up, that's it.

    So my advice is to early on make it clear you're looking for new friends. During the conversation fit in how you're not looking to date and just want to make some good friends and meet new interesting people.

    Just keep in mind that you might be making friends with somebody you would have wanted to date and might kill that possibility before it even had a chance.

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    • Would you say as long as I'm up front with just wanting a friendship, he at least feel I respected him and didn't lead him on?

    • Every guy is different in that regard. I wouldn't take it to heart, other might though.

  • Honestly, we men don't much attention to girls that we're not interested in romantic relations with.

    If I met a girl through a group of friends that I thought was a cool chick, but I wasn't interested in her romantically, I probably wouldn't get her number. I'd just assume I'd see her another time because it's honestly not that important.

    And frankly, if I approach a girl seeking romance, anything less sounds like a negotiation. And this isn't Priceline.com.

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    • Basically you are saying that if a guy is interested in being more than friends, he is likely to not want to be my friend because it is painful/insulting to stick around?

      Would you say as long as I'm up front with just wanting a friendship, he at least feel I respected him and didn't lead him on?

    • I would say that as long as you're up front about just wanting friendship, you can definitely use that in your defense when he becomes your friend and eventually tries to build attraction.

      I wasn't saying that it's painful or insulting to have a girl as just a friend if a guy really wants more. But it's certainly not very inviting. And many guys will see it as a situation that they can change, even if you clearly convey to them that it isn't.

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