Which gender is more responsible for the existence of the "dating game"?

Does this fiasco called the "dating game", are the rules PRIMARILY made by men, or by women?

In a nutshell:

are men playing by womens' "rules"...

or...

are women playing by mens' "rules"?

Feel free to vote on the poll, & please comment.

Thank you. No flaming, please. :)

  • The dating games' rules are mainly made by men
    51% (66)22% (19)39% (85)Vote
  • The dating games' rules are mainly made by women
    49% (63)78% (68)61% (131)Vote
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Most Helpful Girl

  • Honestly, I said women. So much of the 'dating game' centers around the man 'courting' the women. But, the men do abide to it and seem to almost...enforce it, sometimes more then women. It's like "I like that girl, I'm going to get her a drink to send that message."

    And then men wonder how they get 'used' financially, and women wonder how they get 'used' sexually.



    How often do you see a women really paying for sex, outside of the obvious situation of 'age' and being a 'callboy'

    How often do women buy a man an engagement ring? OR, what's more, how often would a MAN be COMFORTABLE with that?

    I don't believe in feminism as it's commonly viewed...or rather, a situation where a 'women is in control', however, I do believe in breaking away from propriety and creating more equality in a relationship.

    I don't think men's chivalry should die off, I think women need to step up and RETURN the favors. Let him hold the door open, but...hey, how about the next door you go through, YOU HOLD IT OPEN FOR HIM.

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    • I see where you are coming from, but I also think a lot of guys wouldn't like the door being held open for them. I think it is a pride thing.

    • I've met many who don't mind, but I don't make it a big point. I hold it open just as I would for anyone else. It's a natural habit...if he's not total machismo, he won't view it negatively.

      I'm still able to be very modest and feminine about it, it's not big and showy...it's gracious.

    • Girls don't have to pay for sex because guys are raised to want sex all the time. So when a hot girl asks them for sex, of course theyre going to say yes. Its only the ugly chicks who have to pay a guy or just look for a really revolting or desperate guy to sleep with them. Of course its kinda vise versa as well. If a hot guy was to ask a girl for sex, chances are, the girl is gonna do it.

What Girls Said 9

  • I say men have come up with all those ridiculous rules.

    And if a woman doesn't play by them she's either labeled as desperate, or as disinterested. Which might not be the case at all...

    And I don't know who invented flowers and chocolates as presents for Valentine's day but they where utterly unoriginal.

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    • When the concept of giving flowers and chocolate as gifts was first created, it was probably original. It's just now that 95% of people on the planet have done it that it seems dull.

    • Lol. You're right.

  • If you want to way back into the past, it was most likely men and the society they lived in. Afterall back then women couldn't really decide anything for themselves. Chilivary, courting were necessary as they were the only way a man and a woman could interact without causing scandal for their families.

    Right now I would say women are the ones keeping it up but some men still like to do things that way too.

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  • I would really say neither. There is crazy on both sides, no matter what people say.

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  • Neither. We are both f***ed.

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  • *flaming*

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  • i'd say women

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  • Girls do what they want, Boys do what they can!

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  • The way women dress and behave (including, speech, exercise, diet, conversation, etc.) is often times directed by their instincts concerning what men would want to look at, hear, smell, or touch. Guys don't necessarily have to take as much trouble as girls do in this respect.

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    • ...do you think guys even care? -_-

      Maybe a minority.

    • Show All
    • Wow, how were you raised? If you have to go through all that trouble to seem attractive, you must not be that attractive in general...

    • Hi Rinaxo: I don't need to dress up, lol. I actually try to dress down to get less attention.

      I'm talking about the girls who go out in the tightest thing they can get their hands on so they can make a head turn and the guys who don't feel secure about themselves unless they have the car and clothes designed to impress a prospective partner. Strictly observation from my end, not practicum.

  • Women want to be treated well.

    Men want to treat women well.

    Then men want to be treated well.

    Then women start treating men well.

    it's a cycle.

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    • That looks like a happy ending to me?

    • It sure would be if it was the common cycle. But, yes, it works great when it goes that way. :)

    • ofcourse it's a happy ending, if both parties just let each other know how they want to be treated then they don't settle for less... they will get what they ask for.

What Guys Said 10

  • It's pretty much equal I think, although I think men have to do the initiating, at the end ultimately it's the woman's decision if something should come from the courting. There was a study done at one point about "one night stands" and the study said that although the man who succeeded in laying a woman may have felt that it was all his "game" really it was the woman that chose to have sex with him LONG BEFORE he even initiated. Which seems to imply that maybe, in the nonverbal sense, women do the decision making and initiating long before the guy even approaches, for instance, "inviting" him over with her eyes, body language and whatever. So while the male might feel like he did the decision making to get her into bed, she decided long before him how he got to that point. So I think that whether the courtship even develops rests on whether the woman gives the guy the green light and from that point its his decision to see to it that the courtship is successful. Thus this can be seen as him doing and saying things that gets a girl to respond to his "moves" so to speak, but to really play the game right, is for the guy to develop the upper-hand, which I think women try to fight. They are constantly trying to test a guy's knee jerk reactions, by playing hard to get, being a challenge, being defensive when he first approaching, using jealousy all in an effort to see how far he would go to pursue her. But this seems ironic. Because the more he chases the more he can push her away, but if he doesn't chase, then she thinks he isn't interested. So thus I feel that courtship, if done right will definitely be played by the guy's rules if he plays his cards right, finding the perfect balance between being assertive, not beating around the bush, initiating/risk taking and being too available. Of course, this can be seen as playing by the girl's rules too, but I think the real thing is to get the girl to chase the guy too a little bit, hence not letting the ball be in her court too much.

    "treat me like a lady and I'll be a whore in the bed"

    --Cristabel

    I think its both, but the ultimate decision and the beginning and in the end favors women more.

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  • The base (and hidden) rules are made by women, until men came in and thought they made the game theirs, like they do lots of other things...like religion, business and war...

    Women are more advanced than men regarding matters of life. Why do you think THEY have the womb? They are the one to accept a man into their lives and themselves, so they OWN the 'game.'

    It doesn't make them better than men, just different. Personally, when a woman smiles and truly means it, the world just feels aligned to me.

    A happy woman shines just as bright as the sun.

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    • Sweet. I'd argue it's 50/50 since girls and guys looking for a true connection would want and need the same sort of trust and assurance, but your take on it is still very sweet. :-)

  • Guys who don't like the silly institution feel it's women because so many modern women take advantage of the free meals and entertainment and otherwise could care less about whoever ti is across the table...

    But actually it's men, the wealthy ones, who made up these meat market rules since they have the ability to select from many women that way.

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    • You may have something there...

    • Of course I do! Sensible. non-hustling women don't go in for this, nor do men, but guys feel trapped into playing the game or they just won't have anyone.

      I thought that way until I met a Frenchwoman.

  • Well, I'm stuck playing by women's rules, and that's not getting me anywhere. I propose a lockout by all men so we can realign the rules of dating in our favor.

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  • almost everything that has made our society how it is was from men. most of the social norms were made long before women were thought of as equal (which is still less common than one would think)

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  • I think it's us actually. We judge too lightly every move that a woman does and doesn't do.

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  • I believe the modern dating culture is ruled more by women.

    In the past it wasn't a game, it was marriage and the family unit; that was dominated by men. As the poll says "dating game", I voted women.

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  • Here's an episode of The Dating Game from 1972

    featuring...

    Michael Jackson!

    link

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  • I'd say the dating game originally stems from the male adaptation to what the female would accept in terms of courting. A generalization on how to approach the opposite gender.

    So I'd say men are playing by women's rules, most often.

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  • Women control the institution of dating.

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