Can I tell him he is never allowed to talk about this?

When my boyfriend and I broke up a week ago, I ended up kissing another guy, and although he didn't kiss anyone, he met up with the same girl on two occasions to see if he had any feelings for her. Obviously what I did was worse, but I figure that if we get back together (we're talking about it), he should not be allowed to mention the guy I kissed, and I'm not allowed to mention the girl he met up with. I feel like that would be for the best. Is this unreasonable to ask of him?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think that as he would probably be more hurt by your actions than you are of his, that he should be allowed to discuss it if that is what he wants. If he wants to put it behind him, then that's his decision but I don't think you should force him to not talk about it.

    For me, I prefer issues to be settled rather than ignored. Then, in the future if something out of your control happens and the topic is brought up again (maybe by the guy you kissed, or his friends, whatever), then he won't be upset by it again.

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    • We already talked about it, though, so I feel like the issue was settled, and I feel like if he keeps asking questions about it, it will only perpetuate the pain he felt when he found out about it, and I don't want him to be hurt

    • Hey! I understand how both of you feel. I guess a little bit of him still probably wants to feel hurt because people like to feel sorry for themselves a little (I don't know why.. girls are generally worse!), so you should be prepared to talk about it for a little more. Maybe you can tell him you understand he's upset, but you just want to settle this so he won't be upset anymore. He'll probably get over it by himself soon anyway though, you both seem pretty mature! Good luck =)

What Guys Said 1

  • erm.i would want to leave that out for now.cuz technically ur in an unfavorable position here.imagine.u jus got back together and the relationship is already on the rocks.would you risk pushing it off with this topic?

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What Girls Said 2

  • You can tell him to but ultimately if he wants to talk about it, that's his decision.

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  • You are not together right now so neither of you have to feel guilty about seeing other people. Therefore whatever you or he did shouldn't be brought into the new relationship.

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