I have never been kissed, what judgement do you make about me?

so I'm 18 and the furthest I've gone with a guy has been holding hands and cuddling. a little spooning too.

i ask this because yesterday I found out the guy I liked had another girl in mind. the mutual guy friend who told me ended up playing psychologist with me and helping me talk through my fear of always being replaced by a better girl. he asked about my relationship history and I ended up telling him I had never been kissed even though I planned not to tell anyone that. it makes me feel so inadequate and like no one would like me as more than friends. now I wonder what judgment he made about me knowing that, I know he won't tell anyone but I just feel very vulnerable. he seemed surprised when I told him. I've only known him a month and he is my closest guy friend but I hope he doesn't see me differently after seeing me cry and knowing how inexperienced I am. he also noticed how weak my whole body was after crying and talking for about an hour. he gave me a big hug and picked me up. I was so weak my whole body was really limp and I couldn't control it well. I was just physically and emotionally drained because it was late at night too. I had to really try to make it up the stairs back to my room because my legs were shaking badly.

in this kind of situation, would you think any differently about the girl knowing this very personal stuff? thanks for any answers!

  • I would think less of her for being so weak
    Vote A
  • It doesn't make any difference
    Vote B
  • I would feel closer to her as friends
    Vote C
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy


Most Helpful Guy

  • There's men and women on here that are in their 30 40s and up that have never had a first kiss or boyfriend/girlfriend. Most people find it cute, that someone isn't experienced shows they have good morals or something along the lines of that :). You'll find him don't worry so much about it. GL !


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What Guys Said 5

  • Actually it depends on the guy.

    I chose option C because I am a guy who has neither had any physical relationship nor his first kiss.

    My respect for her would just double because she has been through something similar through which I have been. :-)

  • Wouldn't make a lick of difference. In fact, if I happen to be said person that gets to be even closer to you than any before that kinda makes it feel like I'm truly special to you and ya... that's a good thing. But, it really wouldn't matter in the end. I don't care if a girl has no experience (can be cute sometimes), I just cause if she has too much. As in she's doing anything with anyone or ya... whatever.

  • That wouldn't disuade me from a girl. If I liked a girl, and found out she'd never been kissed, I'd still like her, and probably want to be her first.

  • not a big deal to me at all, actually doesn't matter

  • I was 24 and had my first kiss so I know how you feel


What Girls Said 2

  • I don't know how much it helps since I'm a chick, but IMHO being a kiss virgin isn't that big of a deal. I didn't have my first kiss until I was 22 -not that I am unattractive or that there's something wrong with me. In fact I consider myself quite a looker. I just simply have a very specific set of standards for the kind of guy that I look for, and they are few and far between. I had lots of chances with guys in the past but I just never developed feelings for any of them.

    I'm the kind of person who doesn't like to play around when looking for a partner -I think life is too short to waste your time on someone you don't have feelings for. As a result when I find a guy that I DO have chemistry with, I know that he's a good one. But I digress.

    Being a kiss virgin doesn't mean that you're weird, it just means that you have high standards. And believe it or not when you decide to go in for that first smooch and you let your guy in on your little secret, he'll probably feel very special and honored.

    If not, he's a d***.. :)

    • thanks, your answer makes me feel better :D I don't think I have too high of standards, I just want a genuine guy who is funny and a gentleman. I haven't even had the chance to be picky in relationships, I have only been asked out once and we only got to a second date where we held hands, then he got back with his ex :( I've asked guys to things before but they always want it to be just as friends

  • That is perfectly fine and normal.

    I have a rule to only kiss guys who I am serious about.

    I have only had 2 serious boyfriends, and even tho I am 23, I have only kissed 2 guys.

    Nobody should judge you on that, I respect you for it & so will guys.

    I know of many people who have not been kissed at 18 & older. It just means you reserve kissing for someone/something special that hasn't happened quite yet.

    • what the.. wow. from reading your other comments I thought you slept around

    • Yeah people like to call me a dirty slut because I have an open mind. Its pretty funny.