Do you consider kissing on a first date disrespectful?

Just wondering as it says, do you consider a guy kissing you on the first date to be disrespectful to women?

Also consider if it's a first date with someone you've never met in person, like someone you've met on the internet.

Updates:
Let me tell you now what happened on a date I went on, that prompted me to write this question:

I met this girl online, we hit it off really well when chatting and all, we texted a lot for a few weeks, she was even calling me 'dear' and 'honey'. Finally we went on the first date, going bowling together, it went well and we had fun, joking and flirting and all, then when we were about to part ways, I wanted to kiss her (but I was a bit shy), so I said "Kiss me" and she leaned a bit and I kissed
her, just two quick pecks on the lips, I just wanted to 'show' her that I liked her a lot. Then, I texted her after the date, and she tells me that "the kiss was too much..." and she was "weirded out", and eventually told me that she's upset at me now, and doesn't want to talk to me anymore because during the date we had talked about the subject of respecting women, and that me kissing her was 'disrespectful', and showed that I didn't listen to her. So that's the story behind this question.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't accept a kiss on the first date. I have no moral issue with it, I just have been on many first dates and think it is too soon for me to know or send a message to the guy that I like him enough to kiss. Kissing is intimate, it should not be something you do with someone you barely know.

    As far as a guy trying to kiss me on the first date, I am not a fan of it but I wouldn't necessarily think badly of him trying and I am good at deflecting a kiss without saying anything to the guy. I have had a couple of kisses land on my cheek and it happened so quick that I am sure the guy thought it was an accident and he shrugged it off. If the guy was insistent in trying again I would probably not date him again because that is pushy and makes him seem like someone who just wants a sexual deal.

    Overall I would advise you not trying to kiss the girl but giving her a hug and on the 2nd date going for a kiss.

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    • if she didn't want a kiss on the first date I would take that as disinterest or she wasn't attracted to me :(

    • Why? If a girl smiles at you, looks you in the eye, flirts and overall seems to be enjoying the date it doesn't mean she is not interested in you just because she doesn't accept a kiss. If you ask her out again, and she doesn't accept that date, well then you know, but don't bank everything on a first date kiss.

    • I read your update and overall I think this was more about you two not having chemistry than anything. Sure, you liked her but it wasn't working for her or she would have enjoyed the kiss and not said a thing. She may have been "weirded out" by the fact you asked her to kiss you. I don't know that I have ever had a guy tell me to kiss him. So, you two are just not a match and, yes, I would hold off on a first kiss until you felt confident enough to just kiss the girl without asking for it.

What Girls Said 15

  • If the date goes really well and both people really feel a connection, then I don't think it's disrespectful. And if I've known the person for a bit before that first date (in person, not online) then I think it's okay as well.

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  • it will really depend on a lot of things such as, hw much you like each other, the place the time and so on but disrespectful? only if you force it!

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  • If you actually know the person before going on a date with them then it might be OK. If it's your first time meeting them then it might be too soon. Of course if she seems open to it, go for it.

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  • depends on the connection you guys have been building before the actual meetup and on the woman.

    For me, if I rele like a guy, and feel I have a good sense of what he's about I'd be OK with kissing him ( kissing some1 I'm into helps me get a better sense of my level of attraction for this person). Though this is considerin he isn't being all pervy and rele persistant about it.

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  • disrespectful if she is drinking/drunk. DONT DO IT

    but if sober, its not disresepctful, but I think its too soon.

    i think the first date, should be for getting a initial feeling about a person. then go home, sleep on it, and of you wake up and wana see her again, tats date two and all the kissing in the world is allowed. maybe even more. hehe

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  • I feel that if the date went really well then a first kiss is totally appropiate; however, sometimes I feel that it takes more than one date.

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  • it all depends on how the date went. I've had kisses on first dates... some were awkward, but some were fabulous. You just know if it's right, you can tell

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  • No. I usually give the guy a kiss but that's IF I like him.

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  • It's only disrespectful if you try and force it on the girl. If she is all for it then it is not disrespectful

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  • i think so, unless I've known him before and had a crush on him and he took me out. But a guy on a blind date trying to kiss me is like peer pressure and I don't like to kissed by a complete stranger until I've gotten a likeness to him first

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  • not at all,in fact if you don't kiss, she may assume you're jus tnot into her.

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  • if I like him it would be nice lol :) although I think, he doesn't think anything but sex lol :D

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  • No, if the date went really well then a kiss is not a bad thing

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  • Kind of. Some of us girls feel like kissing is intimate. Pretty much what Tamikaze said. Then again in your situation if it was just pecks I wouldn't go overboard about it. She's probably never been kissed before and wanted it to be special? She should have heard you out at least. Don't worry about it, sounds like you dodged a bullet if she's overreacting already.

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  • No.

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What Guys Said 4

  • Kissing on a first date is virtually mandatory if you're serious.

    Save sex for the second date.

    If you can.

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  • if they liked each other and the date went really well then there is nothing wrong with kissing on the first date

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  • Nothing bad about that...

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  • not really.

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