How long do guys wait to call after a 1st date?

I went on a first date a week ago tonight. I thought we both had a real good time and the chemistry was intense. He said he was going to Miami the next day for a week. Should I be worried that he still hasn't called me? Is he waiting to get back from him trip?

Updates:
He was getting back yesterday so I broke down and sent him a text "Thinking about you :)" I didn't even get a response back. I erased him from my contacts so I wouldn't even be tempted to text him again. I get the point...if he was interested, he would have at least said hi back. He is definitely back in town by now.
I hope you guys still remember this post...He just text me now. He said "Miss me?" I had erased him from my contacts but I know it's him. I don't even know what to say back. We went out almost 3 weeks ago. Should I pretend like I don't know even know who it is and say " Oh I erased you because you never text me back?" so confused...help!



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Most Helpful Guy

  • I just got a few texts ignored (long story) not too long ago and I was thinking today "What if she hits me back in a week or two as if nothing happened?"

    The only conclusion I could draw is that if she was going to play the ignore game with me then she obviously thinks of me as a toy to play with, so if she hits me back it probably means she just got bored of whatever else she had going on.

    Tread carefully on this one is what I'm saying, he could just be feeding his ego because he knows you like him, and I'm sorry to say but obviously a lot more then he likes you. Same thing as in my story. Keep your guard up, you don't have to ignore him but you need to stop showing emotions for him and text calm and neutral. Think of it as texting an acquaintance who might possibly want to hang out with you, nothing more. You did all the chasing up to this point, if he's truly interested let him come to you- but do NOT let him bait you into chasing him all over again. I know you'd want to do nothing but return his flirts and advances but I guarantee you it'll end up just feeding his ego and hell drop you like a hot potato again.

    Stay strong, you and I both are in the same boat so I feel for ya.

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    • Bleep...thanks for your response. I know I haven't been playing my cards right. You don't even wanna know what happened on our 1st date...We almost went all the way. We have known each other for 10 years as platonic friends and would run into each other here and there. I swear I'm not usually like this. I'm the one always telling my gfs play hard to get and now look at me!

      What would be your advice as to when to text back? tonight? tomorrow? wait a few days? What do I say. Just a hi?

    • Hahahaha I know EXACTLY how you feel right now, when I say we're in the same boat I meant it! Now when it comes to responding back to a text, unless it isn't RIGHT AWAY I don't see a problem with it being the same day. However it's clear that he's going fishing with the "Miss me?" text, don't fall for it. Now if you still feel this is salvageable respond with a casual "Hey" or "hows it going" or something of the sort, they key is to let him start a conversation you feel you're in charge of!

What Guys Said 6

  • Give it another week, if he doesn't call then it's 100% done. In the meantime though don't think about it.

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  • No, you don't need to be worried yet. Give it another few days. He hasn't forgotten about you; if he's interested, you'll hear from him.

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  • sounds to me like he is the type of guy that uses people, why else would it have taken this long in order for him to get back to you?

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    • It will be 3 weeks tomorrow since I saw him. Not trying to give him excuses but he went to Miami for a week and Last week was thanksgiving.

    • thats true I guess but he did say ill call you when I get back

  • I probably wait until I get my shoes off after I get home.

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    • yeah it's been a while since he got home. Even if he texts me back...which I know he will eventually. He will not get the same response from me. Time to play hard to get. I hate games...but now the game is called "I like myself" so he has to work much harder

    • I would suck at that game since I don't like myself

  • Wait until that week is up and he gets back, most likely he will call you when he gets back but long distance is expensive in a hotel so that explains why he won't call you now lol

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  • Minimum 3 days. But a trip to Miami might mean waiting until I got back.

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    • so tomorrow is going to be 3 weeks since we went out. He text me an hour ago. Should I just give him the benefit of a doubt. After all he was in Miami for one week and last week was Thanksgiving. Thanks for your input!

What Girls Said 1

  • I say continue to make other plans. Don't wait on him. If he wants to go out again, he will call.

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