I've been with my boyfriend for 8 months and we live together, He moved here a year ago from another state but he doesn't really have any friends here except people I've introduced him to or friends of mine. he really only likes to spend time with me. is this right? he certainly doesn't have a pack of guy friends, but he's not really that kind of guy.
Is it just him or a maturity thing, I'm not sure.
Most Helpful Girl
Well, I think you first have to consider that different people have different "friendship styles". Some people are very social, make friends easily, and have lots of friends. Some people are very particular about their friends and prefer to only have a few (and because they're picky about who they're friends with, they often have a more difficult time making friends), some people would like more friends, but have difficulty making them, and some people are more "loner" types (who don't really care or want to have many friends). I don't see any of these styles as better or worse than the others, they're just different.
Keep in mind too, that it can be difficult to make friends when you move to a new place, particular when you're older (often there are less opportunities, or the people you do meet might already have a close social network or have families that they devote all their time to).
So, I think the two questions that you should ask are:
1. Is he truly happy without having his own group of friends? This might be a little tricky to answer, since it isn't a matter of thinking about how YOU would feel in his position, but thinking about how HE feels. If he's more of a loner-type, he might be fine without having his own group of friends.
2. Is it that you're the only person he wants to spend time with, or is it that he wants to spend all his time with you? Those are two different things. If you're the only person he wants to spend time with, I don't necessarily see that as a problem (especially if he's a loner by choice). However, if he wants to spend all his time with you, I would see that as a problem. It's important for a couple to spend some time apart, have their own interests and hobbies, etc. and it wouldn't be a healthy relationship if he is completely dependent on you.
Optimally, even if he is a loner, I think it would be better if he had a friend or two (or family nearby) other than you, so that he isn't completely reliant on you, but keep in mind that not everyone has an easy time making friends and sometimes it takes awhile.1