I don't know if I love him, and if I should continue dating him.

Hi. I'm in high school, 17 years old. I have dated this guy on and off for around 2 years now. The first time around, we broke up after four months because he couldn't see me often. My parents don't like him and forbade the relationship. He totally screwed me over and went out with some other girl the month after. He admitted he missed me though. We got close again, however he stayed with her.

I did not talk to him for a few months, and he contacted me again.

I did a stupid thing and admitted I missed him, and he said he missed me too.. We got back together, but I knew it wouldn't last long as he was constantly thinking about this other girl. He pretty much ruined that year for me since I gave a lot of my time to him and it blew up in my face in more ways than one. I lost my innocence just to keep him happy. I ruined my relationship with my parents.

I gained some sense and totally cut him off for several more months. I ignored his texts, calls, emails, etc.

He came to me in July of last year though, and ultimately told me he hated not being able to see me freely but still loved me. You could say I...fell for it, but gave in, because I think at the time I felt happy that he sort of had to chase after me, like I did with him. However, in the space of time I did not talk to him, I had gotten over him and gotten back with him out of stupidity. I had also missed having someone care about me.

I grew to love him again, but then now every time I'm with him, I feel nothing. I want to break up with him, and have tried before but it never works. He always assures he loves me, but I don't feel any way about him until he's gone. We have no future together because of my parents. Knowing all of this, I can't let him go. is there anyway to fix this? What should I do?

Updates:
I just broke up with him. I feel horrible, but I guess I'll be okay?

I think I don't want to lose him altogether or something.. I don't know.

Someone help me out with some wise words? I'm kinda in tears.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Of course you'll be ok! Breaking up was the right thing to do. It's perfectly normal that you feel horrible now, but it simply had to be done. It might not mean that you're going to lose him altogether. For now it's best to give each other space but there's a possibility that in the future you can be friends. Just concentrate on yourself at the moment, and give both of you time to heal and maybe then you can be friends.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Hey, you're too young to be involved with anyone in the first place; your parents were right.

    There are a lot of people who care about you, starting with your parents. They may not always be right but it's clear they care about you.

    No boy should be 'ruining' any year for you, not now or ever, but at your age, boys shouldn't be such an important thing in your life. Find other interests--academics, sports, reading, writing articles, dancing. There are so many things you should be exploring in life, not primarily boys.

    AS for him, just tell him you want your freedom! You deserve that. Its normal not to have deep feelings at your age, so just let it go.

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What Girls Said 4

  • he sounds like a player...on and off? those aren't the best type of relationships

    you need to look after yourself girlie. move on.

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  • I agree with what the other two said. He does sound like a player. Be honest with yourself. If you aren't sure you love him than you probably don't. I know that you feel bad about it now but your still in high school. You've got time to find someone. I know that you don't want to hear it but your still young so enjoy your friends and move on. Be single for a bit and when you least expect it you'll find someone who is great and wonderful and who deserves you.

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  • The only thing you can do is break up with him. You don't have feelings for him and you only miss him when he's gone. It's not him you miss, it's that you miss being with someone, having someone to care about, and someone who cares about you. It's always hard to break up with someone, even if there are no more feelings and even if you know it's the right thing to do. But see it this way: the longer you stay with him, the longer you're stealing the chance from yourself to meet someone you have feelings for.

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  • Forget abvout him, there really is not future with this kid

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